Immersion

Stuff Christians Like: The Soloist

2009-08-12T08:16:00.001-07:00

http://www.stuffchristianculturelikes.com/

I love sites like this. It’s always entertaining to get a humorous perspective of something when you live so closely to it that you’re often blind to the parts of it that are, to be blunt, pretty silly. It’s no mystery that the modern Christian is quickly becoming defined by fashion statements, coffee shop attendance, and entertainment choices. I especially love the one about Leading Worship Barefoot. We LOVE to be comfortable on stage and create a non-threatening atmosphere for those who come to worship with us! ;)

And I only bring this website up to familiarize the concept a bit. I frequently think like this. Just by nature, I’m a bit of an observer. I never hesitate to point out something that seems odd, or to ask why if I don’t understand. I need more than two hands to count the times I’ve offended someone by challenging something near and dear to their hearts just because, quite frankly, I never saw the connection between their faith and the subject of said offensive question (eg: removing hats for prayer, using ‘soft’ swear words).

Last night my roommate and I were watching The Soloist. And I’m going to bold this sentence because it’s important: I’m NOT speaking out against The Soloist, or any movie that would fall into the same general category. I swear, if anyone sends me an email or responds to this with some dimwitted comment about how I missed the point of the movie, he or she will be met with a swift reply about something in which he or she also missed the point. ;)

The movie had a good message. In all honesty, I liked what the director said in the preface more than the movie itself. Homeless people ARE our brothers and sisters, and often times, treating them like human beings might be more helpful than apologizing for not having any spare change. But that’s the moment that hit me: This is something Christian culture loves.

We love movies with wholesome messages. We love songs with motivational and encouraging lyrics. We love any and all media that encourages a humanitarian reform in our lives.

Ready for the kick in the crotch? Here it comes…

Why does it end there?

Why do get so swept up by movies that call us out on crap that we do that is actively damaging the world around us, and then not change? Is it Christian to just show our support for those things, and then go about our daily lives as if it doesn’t apply to us? Are we honestly so naïve as to think that just because we agree with a convicting message that it somehow excuses us from any responsibility?

I mean, imagine if Luke 9 had actually gone like this…

Jesus Sends Out the Twelve
1When Jesus had called the Twelve together, he gave them power and authority to drive out all demons and to cure diseases, 2and he sent them out to preach the kingdom of God and to heal the sick. 3He told them: "Take nothing for the journey—no staff, no bag, no bread, no money, no extra tunic. 4Whatever house you enter, stay there until you leave that town. 5If people do not welcome you, shake the dust off your feet when you leave their town, as a testimony against them." 6After that, while nodding in approval, Peter said to the other disciples, “Wow, yea, he’s got a good point!” Fidgeting uncomfortably, Andrew nervously suggested, “You guys wanna just go back to fishing? I’m sure there’s someone else who is better at this whole ‘Kingdom of God’ stuff than us.” 7They all breathed a sigh of relief, and walked away knowing that the weight of the world was no longer on their shoulders.

Can you begin to imagine the fury Jesus would’ve felt? Unless I’m drawing a line between things that are unrelated, that’s roughly what we, as Christians, do. A defining aspect of our Christian culture is to say support good causes, but not actually get off our butts and do anything about it.

Anyway, I’m going back to my comfy desk job. I just thought I’d share these musings with you.

Why I Will Never Own an iPhone

2009-08-05T11:22:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of Christian bloggers out there who love to take an aspect of our culture, vilify it, equate it to sin, and make us all think twice about doing something that we all do anyway. Well, I’m no different. There are a lot of things that genuinely abhor about the way we live our lives as we claim to be followers of Christ. But, I’m not about to blame the gun for hurting someone – we make our own choices, and we’re responsible for the consequences. And, for the record, I won’t preface anything I say here by saying I don’t intend to offend you. In fact, if something I say here pertains to you, I hope it DOES sting a little, because I think it’s a pretty important that we step beside ourselves once in a while and look at the big picture of our lives in relation to the one we call our savior.

That said, the recent hype over smart phones has been an excellent reflection of something that gets to me sometimes. I’ve owned one. They’re pretty slick, there’s no denying that. It’s fun to instantly text your friends as many times as you want, even while you’re sitting in a boring meeting at work. It’s nice to be able to poke around on the internet in the middle of a conversation to look up some important information. And heck, I’ll even admit I’ve been impressed by the program that can identify a song just by listening to it.

But, here’s where I get hung up. I know a million people who own these top-of-the-line phones, so I’m frequently exposed to conversations about them. While it’s neat that these fancy phones have all these extra features that could probably neuter your dog if you needed them to, I almost never hear anyone saying how thankful they are that they own this big, fancy phone. They tout the features of it, but never how helpful it is, or how convenient it is, or how “It totally saved my life when I was lost on a gravel road in the middle of nowhere” (a frequent excuse for owning one).

I can’t honestly say that I have ever heard anyone, nor do I think I ever will hear anyone, say, “I am SO happy that I have this iPhone so I can play farting noises in the middle of quiet rooms!” Yes, there is a Fart application. I’m not kidding.

And it makes me wonder, how often do we do things JUST because they’re the cool thing to do without really thinking through whether it’s something we need or not? I’m not about to roll into a rant about being wise with your money, or how we should consider our blessings in light of those less fortunate, though those are both topics very worthy of discussion in their own rite. What I am more concerned about is the underlying behavior, and how we drag it into our faith.

It reminds me of when I first started in music ministry. I was itching like crazy to play. I remember harassing Michael Novotny for weeks on end to get me an audition in the middle of Easter season. And when he finally did, I was all over the place almost instantly. I got into playing for the Hope weekend services, I quickly got asked to play for Immersion, people in the Immersion band asked me to help with student ministry music, and soon I was dragging my bass out to Jordan Creek and Ashworth 5 or 6 nights a week. I was on fire!

And this isn’t entirely different than what it’s like getting a smart phone. First you see your friend’s new phone and all the fun things it can do. Soon you’re enamored and hell-bent on getting one for yourself. FINALLY the day arrives when you’re holding that $500 pile of plastic and gadgetry in your hands, and it begins! You get all your contacts organized, synch up your email, Facebook, Twitter, and whatever other account you “need” to access with it, load on all your music, get pictures of all your friends, download all the latest applications, and use any and every excuse to be meddling with your phone throughout the day. I mean, if you’re stuck in a long line at the McDonald’s drive-through, the Twitter-verse needs to know about it, right?

But, slowly it started to wear on me. This super awesome music schedule that I’d run headlong into had basically overtaken my life and was pulling me away from friends and family, distracting me at my job, and interfering with good habits that I’d worked hard to develop. There came a point where I realized that it had felt like months since I’d even sat down and had a heart to heart with the person I considered to be my best friend. And from there, the realizations of the life I’d lost started pouring in…

How I never got to work out…
How I never had time to go out to eat during the week…
How I never spent time reading the Bible…
How I was blowing off family engagements and holidays to play…
How I hadn’t seen to my mom in nearly a year, and was using music as a reason not to…

And what killed most, how most of the time when I was out there playing, I felt empty. It wasn’t giving me life. I wasn’t giving a gift to God – I was there begrudgingly, because I felt I had to. As a musician, this is just what you did, right?

Well, in my heart, I don’t think so. I don’t think Christ would call any of us to live that way. I will boldly say that I think we, as Americans, do way too much, way too often, and we let it suck life away from us JUST because that’s what is expected of us. Or, that’s just what we do. That’s just what is cool.

If you are a Christian, and you aren’t going to church at LEAST once a week, you don’t read your Bible every day, you aren’t in a Bible study, you don’t volunteer in some ministry within the church, and you haven’t shared the gospel with your coworkers, you’re some kind of failure. Tell me that message hasn’t crossed your mind at least once. Do it, and I’ll happily call you a liar.

I could go on and on about this, but I think you see my point by now. Never be afraid to genuinely examine your life, your time, your investments, your activities, and asking why they’re a part of your life. Is it there because it’s a genuine calling from God, or is it there just because you felt like it was what you should do? If you never even have time to just go sit in the sun and watch the grass blow, maybe you need to think about the relative importance of everything that is filling up your life.

Try it sometime; I think you’ll be pleased with what you discover.

Redefined, But Not Recreated

2009-07-07T07:00:00.000-07:00

I don’t really know how or why it came to me, but this morning I had a pretty neat thought pertaining to all of the current relationship discussions we’ve had at Immersion:

Christ calls us to be servants, not to change who we are.

Jesus finds us just as we are, accepts us, and then invites us into a relationship in which we’re called to submit 100%, just as he already has for us. In the midst of our sins, shortcomings, and failings, he doesn’t withhold his invitation for a single one of us. And in those times when we don’t submit ourselves entirely to him, he offers us grace - a chance to get up and try again, all the while knowing full well that it won’t be long before we slip up the next time.

And in that grace, Christ encourages us to turn from those things that pull us away from him. Never forcefully, Christ offers us a chance to redefine who we are. We don’t have to define ourselves according to our struggles. Instead, a few words that describe us are redeemed, valued, treasured, special, adored.

But the most beautiful part of that is, when we know that we’re redeemed, valued, treasured, and adored, Christ encourages us to be who we are! He encourages musicians to sing and play, he encourages artists to paint and create, and he most certainly encourages those with a knack for the culinary to cook mouth-watering feasts!

This is why the words that came to me this morning struck me as so profound. Christ asking us to turn from our sin isn’t asking us to change who we are; he’s peeling away layer after layer of crap to get to the core of who we are, while revealing the most beautiful parts to shine more brightly and truly than before.

When you’re thinking of your current relationship, or a future relationship, keep that in mind. Know that being a servant doesn’t mean giving up what makes you who you are; it means allowing God’s love to shine through that other person to you, and vice versa, so that you can both be complete in one another, lacking nothing. It means being completely open and honest about your deepest struggles, and loving each other enough to move out of them together.

It doesn’t mean you’re going to have to give up every hobby you enjoy. It doesn’t mean you’ll never get to enjoy Thai food again. It doesn’t mean that you’re going to be bored by every movie you choose to see. Heck, with the way that God knows the deepest desires of our hearts, the person he pairs you with might even have those same quirky preferences as you! ;)

Unpacking

2009-06-15T07:46:00.000-07:00

It never ceases to amaze me how often I find myself revisiting what I consider to be the most basic, core principles of Christ’s teachings. You know what I mean, those little token phrases that get tossed around in the church, like how “Jesus loves everyone equally” or how “Jesus was God.” So often, I dismiss those concepts as things I’ve heard before, and don’t give them so much as a second thought. But it seems that God has done some of the most powerful work in my life – or at least, in my brain – with those very concepts that I never bothered to think through completely. Although these sayings that we’ve all heard a million times are very familiar, the implications are vast, and seemingly endless.

The one that really has been ringing loudly in my ears lately is the one about how Jesus calls us to be “in the world, but not of it.” Jesus himself frequently spoke about his kingdom not being of this world, and likewise how if the people questioning him knew his father (who is also from said kingdom), then they would know him. However, a quick read through any gospel will quickly reveal that friend and foe alike had no clue where Jesus was from, where his kingdom was, or why he was there with them in the first place despite his best attempts to explain everything clearly.

I think it goes without saying that there are a million great examples of Jesus demonstrating behavior that not only affirmed his own faith in his claims, but validated them. Curing diseases, controlling nature, and raising people from the dead are just a few. But, what particularly interests me is how he interacted with the culture – the people of the time.

Anyone who had grown up for over 30 years in first-century Nazareth would have had a pretty sound understanding of the cultural norms of that time. Said person would know that people with skin diseases are to be avoided. He would know that when a person has been dead for several days, there is no saving them. This person would understand that disrespecting authority would earn you more than a slap on the wrist.

But, these are exactly the kinds of things that Jesus ignored. He did everything that made people’s jaws drop. He chose love over the norms that their culture had constructed because he knew that love was greater.

This isn’t anything new under the sun, nor is it a huge revelation for most people. But as I said, it’s when I think through the implications of those things that I think God really starts talking to me. With that in mind, I have to wonder about a few things…

Jesus knew what he was doing. He had to know that people were going to react extremely when he turned a deaf ear to everything that was “right” in their time. He had to know that the lowly, mistreated, and ignored people would almost instantly turn their hearts over to him. Likewise, he had to know that he was going to piss off the people who had dedicated their lives to keeping their religious beliefs in check, and their communities in order.

Think about that for a second. It’s easy to say, but put yourself in the shoes of those people. Think about how incredibly offensive Jesus was, right or wrong. I have to wonder if maybe the heated arguments that Jesus got into with the Pharisees weren’t fueled by the fact that he had no respect for their high-and-mighty position in society. Numerous times, we see them coming back to fight with him and try to catch him in a trap. Do you think maybe their pride was a little bent out of shape? I mean, we paint the Pharisees to be such horrible people, but we’d react the same way if some low-life came talking to us like he knew something we didn’t. How would you feel seeing someone standing outside an abortion clinic who, instead of protesting, was doing nothing more than giving hugs to the women who walked in and out? What if he sat on the bench outside the clinic and had a conversation with them? What if he loved them as if they hadn’t done anything wrong? Does that get on your nerves just a little? It probably would.

Now, on the other side of the coin…

Be brutally honest with yourself about your biggest insecurity, your worst fear, or the thing you hate most about your life. Think about the thing that you feel segregates you from the rest of society, or the thing that prevents you from ever taking risks in your life. What if an unsuspecting person on the street, who looked to be nothing special, walked up to you and relieved you of your affliction? How would you feel? Part of me would feel completely thrown off by the fact that someone who appeared to have no money, no education, or no power changed my life in a way that a doctor or psychologist never could! If it were me, I’d probably be asking for a way to repay him and show my gratitude! I’d go around telling everyone about the incredible thing he did for me!

Anyway, like I said before, this is probably nothing that you’ve never heard before, but God’s really been speaking loudly to me about this lately. It’s easy to say that I’m a Christian, but it’s not always easy to do the “right” thing and risk being seen as someone who has no clue how a culture operates. It’s not easy to get off my high horse and serve someone lower on this irrelevant totem pole of society that we’ve arbitrarily constructed. It’s equally as challenging to speak love into situations that 90% of our culture would chastise me for contradicting.

Home Away

2009-05-07T08:44:00.000-07:00

I was left tossing and turning, jumping at every noise outside my window, wondering who was out there, making sharp turns to look at my bedroom door. I didn’t want to feel this way, I prayed that it would stop, it felt so…. so… unnatural, when I think being afraid of a serial rapist would be societies “natural.” I felt so distant from myself, so lost, so disturbed. How could this man who I have never met or (to my knowledge) never come in contact with, have so much control over my thoughts and actions. It occurred to me that I was in my home, but it didn’t feel safe, it didn’t feel like home. My fear took that from me.

Why did this feeling have so much control over me? It was running my life. I know that God is always with me, whom shall I fear? God is my strength and my refuge… all those things were so far from me… I couldn’t seem to control myself. How did I get this way? I wasn’t acting like I knew these truths.

I was fearful.
I was a mess.

I hated it!

It got me thinking as to the other thoughts or feelings I may have throughout my day that steal God’s best for me.

Selfishness, envy, insecurity, lust, impatience, laziness, anger, gluttony, greed, oh… did I mention selfishness… I swear that is the root.

There are so many “little” things that can creep into my mind that eat away at my soul and destroy my life. Do you ever act our of one of these ugly things listed above and think to yourself “this isn’t right, this doesn’t feel like my true self, this is stealing me away from my home, my life with my maker.”

I want to take steps and notice these little things before they become bigger, deal with them with God and try not to let them control my thoughts and actions.

I want to be home.

@JesusChrist

2009-05-01T07:26:00.000-07:00

For those of you who weren’t in attendance at Immersion last night (or for those of you who weren’t watching the live steam on live.bedeviant.com) Justin gave a pretty neat talk about the ways that we have seen advancing communication forms change the way in which we’re able to share the news of the gospel.

The example that he gave that pertains the most to us as Christians, I think, is Martin Luther’s belief that everyone should have their own Bible in a language that they could understand (not Latin). More specifically, the example relied heavily on the technology that allowed him to run with this idea: the printing press.

Martin Luther pushed printed translations of God’s word to everyone who had ears to hear, and became revolutionary in doing so. Today, the effects are still very tangible as 99% of us still have a printed Bible of some sort.

Justin went on to compare the technological advances of the internet to the printing press. The internet has given us nearly limitless capabilities to reach people on all ends of the globe in a plethora of mediums. Much in the way that the printing press was able to bring God’s word right to people’s hands and eyes, the internet takes that to a whole new level. People can watch church services online, watch worship music on YouTube, meet fellow Christians on Facebook and Twitter, read blogs where nerdy musicians are allowed to ramble, so on and so forth. The fact that we have a million golden opportunities is undeniable.

But, a question remains…

After the service last night, a friend of mine seemed less than enamored with the message of the night, so I inquired for an explanation. She told me that although Justin was correct about everything he said, she was concerned about the internet making church so accessible that it could promote complacency [or, at least, that’s what I heard]. That, while it’s great people can watch Immersion online, if that’s all they ever do with their faith, are we really helping? Or are we holding them back?

It’s a great question, and a very valid concern. If we go to the aforementioned example, we can definitely say that something happened between Martin Luther’s revolutionary actions and where we are today with printed Bibles. Perhaps people in Luther’s time were concerned that giving a Bible to everyone would have similar negative repercussions. Maybe they were concerned that people would sit in their homes and read, and that church attendance would plummet. Maybe they were concerned that people would start forming their own ideas of the Bible and start their own religious belief systems. Who knows? All we can say is that despite what concerns they may have had, the printed Bible has become a staple of anyone’s faith, and that a Christian life without it would be a very difficult one indeed.

I think that as we move forward into this unavoidable digital future, it would behoove us to ask similar tough questions and address our concerns about what we’re doing.

What can we do to ensure that, even though we are using technology to reach people, we are still nudging them into community?
How can we simultaneously broadcast our services to be viewed in front of a computer and promote a life of action that involves people getting up and going?

These new technologies are fantastic, and embracing them with the hope of spreading God’s love is equally as fantastic. As Justin said last night, “If Jesus were here today, he’d be on Twitter.” But, I’d have to add, Jesus would still get off his computer to go cast out demons, heal the sick, and preach the good news. Let’s make sure we’re doing the same!

Eyes to See

2009-04-27T20:44:00.000-07:00

I was taking a walk the other day when a little boy who couldn’t have been older than two or three suddenly ran out from behind a house, looked at me, and yelled, “Hi, Mom!” Now, this greeting was surprising on at least two levels. First, I’ve never come close to mothering a child. Second, I’d never seen this little boy before. I laughed, but then got to thinking about it. Kids aren’t the only ones who get confused. As adults we sometimes do the same thing; we don’t see things as they really are, though we may not notice at the time. We call it love when it’s really lust. We deem something or someone a success or a failure, when really we’re merely thinking in worldly, temporary terms. We consider situations hopeless when God’s cooking up something really great. God must react to those mistaken assessments with laughter, much as I reacted to the little boy, and also with grief, when these situations pull us away from him.

As I turn 27, I find myself struggling with questions about where I should be and what I should be doing. As I crawl closer to my “late 20s” it’s hard not to evaluate life so far and consider my current situation versus that of others and the expectations I had for myself through the years. When I look at it compared to the world’s standards, I’m lagging behind in a lot of areas.

Like a lot of people these days, I’m really struggling to find a job. As some of you know, I worked with a team of missionaries in Mexico City for most of 2008. I could talk about my time there for hours, but let’s just say it’s an experience I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world. But I arrived home last winter in the midst of a brutal economic crisis. I’ve looked online nearly everyday for the last four months or so and have had little success. Thus, I’m pretty much itinerant, living with my parents, my sister and friends. Also, as my friends get married and some begin to have children, it’s easy to feel a bit left behind sometimes. Besides that, I still yearn for Mexico and constantly ask myself (and God) if I should be there or here.

So let’s review: no job, no place of my own, unmarried, confused about the future. This is not where I expected to be at 27. But this is exactly where God expected me to be and that’s so much more important.

I think as Christians we should constantly remind ourselves of the things that God has already done in our lives. When I get bogged down by my frustrations, I pull out journals I’ve kept over the years and meditate on things God has done for me. I’m not a stranger to waiting on God’s provision. I waited for almost a year to see if the funding would come through and everything would line up for the Mexico City trip to happen. It was a year filled with uncertainty, stress and worry. But it worked out perfectly. If God had my life so under control then, even though I wasn’t aware of it, why would now be any different?

And I also remind myself that we all have different needs, which God knows utterly. I could have all the things my younger self expected me to have at 27 and still be completely unhappy. God wired me with a heart for Mexico and took me there. And in order to have the incredible experiences I had there, other things had to be put on hold for awhile. But those things will happen when God, in His complete knowledge of the world and of me, deems it right. And that makes the world’s standards insignificant.

But what do I do in the meantime? Despite the comforts I just described, I still have days when I’m really frustrated. And when I’m frustrated, it inevitably spills into my relationship with God. And it’s confusing, finding myself vacillating between trusting God’s provision and getting discouraged when nothing changes. Sometimes I get hung up on just asking God for things - for guidance and for signs - or just complaining to Him. Don’t get me wrong, God still wants to hear those honest petitions and expressions of anguish. But sometimes I lose track of seeking God merely for the joy of seeking him, being in his presence and knowing him better. At times my soul doesn’t long for Him, but rather for direction, an answer.

Since my time in Mexico City was so important to me, it particularly touches my heart when things I’m learning or experiencing here are affirmed by friends there. As we talked about having “eyes to see as God sees” at Immersion a few weeks ago and I processed through these thoughts, I talked to a friend in Mexico City about some of my frustrations. In response, he said “Ask God to give you understanding so that you can see what He wants you to see”. I don’t think God wants me to just see my struggles. The point of this period of my life is not just to find out the answer or the next step. As I wait for guidance and opened doors, God wants me to see the joy of a beautiful Iowa spring, of reconnecting with old friends and making new ones, of learning to salsa dance, of meeting my first niece. He wants me to see his faithfulness as he provides in his timing, and his comforting presence when everything seems messed up. And, most importantly, He wants me to see Him.

A side note: Please continue to lift up the people of Mexico City in prayer as the city is disrupted and frightened by this influenza. Thanks.

Climb Every Mountain

2009-04-24T09:46:00.000-07:00

There are times I find myself facing a decision in life, a hard one, one that I do not think I can handle or control on my own, something that scares the crap out of me – I am calling this a mountain…. because, let’s be honest – that’s what it feels like.

I believe God places us in front of these mountains throughout our lives because He knows the amazing life that is on the other side waiting for us, the Promised Land. He wants us to trust Him and in doing so He wants to mold us and teach us and bless us beyond our wildest imagination. *

*Christian disclaimer: God never says life is going to be easy, but He does promise His strength for those who trust Him, fulfillment, contagious joy, peace, patience, love…. etc. Now, you can’t put a price tag on those things people!

There are 3 stages to every mountain:

1. Base Camp
2. The Climb
3. The Promise Land

The base camp is your comfort zone. Sure, it can be nice and pleasant most of the time, but there is a part of you that feels like something is missing. You see the mountain in front of you and you can’t help but think to yourself “I wonder what’s on the other side?” Sometimes I like to be in denial about the mountain in front of me. I may stay in base camp for a lot longer than I should because I’m afraid and I do not believe what God promises, because if I did, I would get off my butt! Unfortunately a lot of people stay in the base camp their entire lives, fear takes its grip and they can’t let go. This is a sad…sad thing.

The Climb is…. well, let’s be honest, it’s hard. It’s hard to trust, it’s hard to let go of your comfort zone and give up control in your life. The climb is when you say to God “okay, let’s do this!” It’s hard work, it’s a struggle, and it’s a time of great struggle but with this comes great reward, growth and excitement.

Things that will help you on your climb:

Sher·pas
n. pl. Sher·pas- local people, guides that can help you through your climb. This could be a close friend, someone you can trust, who has great wisdom and has maybe climbed a similar mountain and can encourage you along your trek. God places these specific people in your life and uses them to encourage.

ox·y·gen
n. Symbol O– When my heart is breaking or I’m scared, it can literally be hard to breathe - can I get some air up in here!! Just saying the name of Jesus gives us breathe, he is the life giver and will always be there with us.

com·pass
n.– I bet you didn’t see this one coming, ☺ it’s God’s word. The B-I-B-L-E! God spells things out for us in His word to direct us. Read it!

And finally, the Promise Land which is intended for all of us, and it’s not just when we get to heaven. It’s our sweet spot, the best God has to offer for our lives here on earth. He wants this for each and every one of us; we just have to let Him take us there. This is a life of greatest fulfillment. Maybe you know someone who is living here, they are full of life! This is what God want for you too!

Some mountains seem bigger to us than others, some are scarier to overcome, some make you want to pee your pants. ☺ However, I believe God calls us to LIVE LIFE to the fullest and I truly believe if you are bored in life, you have no one to blame but yourself!

Let’s get a climbing!!

Flurry of Feathers

2009-04-21T06:44:00.000-07:00

This is something that’s been on my heart for quite a while now, and I have yet to come up with any answers as to why we do it.

Let’s face it, Christian or otherwise, people are just generally not very good at communicating with one another. Yesterday over a bowl of Potato Pepperjack Soup from South Union (outstanding soup, by the way), a friend of mine told me that her friends know that when she says, “Nothing!” that she is actually trying to say, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Everyone does this is some way or another. Smiling and nodding at someone when you’re not really interested in what they’re saying, or saying you understand someone so you don’t have to face the embarrassment of not understanding – all sorts of little lies and miscommunication.

So, if everyone does it, what’s the problem?

Well, quite a few things. For starters, lying isn’t good. Even in a casual greeting, if someone asks how you’re doing and you tell them, “Good!” when you’re really not, you lied to them. I don’t think we’re called to tell the truth unless we think that the person isn’t really interested in hearing what we have to say.

That’s just one example. But, there’s one particular behavior regarding poor communication that I am finding interesting. What I’m finding is that our propensity as people, when we’re confused by another, is to go to a third person. When someone behaves in a way that perplexes us, we go ask someone else why they did it. When a significant other is speaking another language to us, we run to a friend of the same gender for translation.

My question is: How rational is this? If you’re confused by someone, what are the odds that another person is going to understand them any better than you? Sure, they may have more reasonable assumptions than you, but they’re still just assumptions, right? Wouldn’t it be more rational to ask the person who is confusing you what they actually mean?

But, we almost never do this, and I have no idea why. I do understand that there is merit in sorting out your own feelings and thoughts with a friend. For instance, if you’re in a disagreement, sometimes it’s constructive to explain how you’re reacting to the situation to an objective third party as a “head check” to make sure you’re not being unreasonable. However, beyond that point, involving someone else can be downright destructive, and basically gossip. The inflection point is when the conversation fails to be constructive. Gossip, in English at least, is defined as “idle” talk (pointless).

I have a coworker who loves to assume he knows other people’s motives. He is convinced that everyone else is motivated by cynicism and is out to make his life miserable. I know this because, well, he tells me about it. Almost everyday I’m told how one coworker who was assigning him work was particularly condescending to him (when in reality, he was just doing his job) or how another coworker is overreacting and being a hot-head about everything towards him.

Here’s the hard question though: If he actually felt talked-down to, or irritated by perceived anger, wouldn’t it make more sense for him to talk to those people, and not me? Probably…

...Wouldn’t it make more sense for me to tell him this instead of griping about it in a blog? Probably…

Anyway, if any of you have seen the movie Doubt, you might remember this. But, I heard a cool analogy about gossip in that movie. It really challenged me to think differently about how I address situations involving a third person. It challenged me to ask myself if I really want to discuss something important and reach a conclusion, or if I just want to complain and make someone else look bad.

Here’s a paraphrase of the story based on my [questionable] memory:

A woman went to confession, and asked the priest about gossip. She explained what she had done, and asked if what she had done was really gossip. The priest told her that yes, it was gossip and that yes, she needed to confess and repent for it.

After that, he told her to go home, take a pillow from her bed, go up to the roof of her house, and stab the pillow with a knife.

She returned to the priest and he asked if she had stabbed the pillow like he asked. She told him that she had. The priest asked her what happened, and she told him that she saw feathers, tons and tons of feathers.

The priest told her to go recollect all of the feathers that had flown from the pillow. The woman responded telling him that it would be impossible. The wind had blown them in a million different places and they couldn’t possibly be found.

“THAT is gossip!” the priest replied.

So, as a fellow human being, I’d encourage you to be counter-cultural. If someone isn’t being clear with you, or you don’t understand them, do the “weird” thing and ask for more explanation. If someone is upsetting you, take some time to cool down, and then talk to them about it. They’re not easy conversations to have, but they’re necessary. The world will know we are followers of Christ by how we love one another – never forget that!

How is your race?

2009-04-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

What comes to mind when you think of Spring? For me, it is track season. I was a sprinter in high school and loved running very short distances as fast as I could. I liked speed, running relays with perfectly timed handoffs, and crossing the finish line knowing I had given the race all I had inside. Well, sadly I think my sprinting days are over so now I try run a few times a week to stay in shape. I am certainly not a distance runner. I cannot stand to run more than a few miles because I get bored and because it’s hard. It’s no wonder the analogy of a race is used several times in the Bible. Here are a few references:

1 Corinthians 9:24-27, “Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should.”

Philippians 3:12-14, “But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

2 Timothy 4:6-8, “As for me, my life has already been poured out as an offering to God. The time of my death is near. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful. And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing.”

God has been teaching me a few lessons these past few weeks about my race:

1. A good diet and plenty of water are crucial. I struggle to run when I have not eaten well for the day and have not had enough water. Same goes for our spiritual races. We need to be in the Word and drinking of the Living Water for our nourishment. How is your spiritual diet?

2. It is hard to run a race facing backwards. It just does not make sense, but yet I do it in my spiritual race. So often I look back at my past mistakes and past failures rather than looking ahead at who I am now and where God is taking me in my future. I’m looking the wrong direction and find my race to be much easier when I turn around and run forward looking ahead. Are you looking back? I encourage you to focus on the race ahead and on the finish line for a much better race.

3. “90% of the race mental and 10% is physical” my coach would say. It is so true...especially in an endurance run. In the middle of a longer run I catch myself looking down at the ground in front of me rather than keeping my head up and focused on the race ahead. I also find that I start to think about how much my body aches and how tired I am rather than thinking about the finish line and how great it will feel to finish the run. In life, are we focusing on the here and now or the finish line. Do we have our eyes on the prize?

4. It is much easier to run with the wind than against the wind. Nothing is harder and more discouraging than to run directly into a strong wind. Nothing is better than having that strong wind at your back to help push you along and keep you strong. Are you running with or against the wind? I pray God will guide me and show me His path for my life so I can always run with His wind at my back. I don’t always know which way I am to go or what I am to do, but I do know I want to go God’s way because I want to run with the wind.

How is your race? Do you run each step with a purpose? What are you running for? What is the prize?

An Adventure!

2009-04-08T12:38:00.000-07:00

(Before I begin, let me just say that my thoughts below may not be entirely correct so I look forward to feedback either way.)

The past several weeks have been quite a journey for me in my spiritual walk with my Savior and my God. I literally drove 3,750 miles on a 3 week road trip designed to get me out of my normal routine so I could focus on what God’s plans and purposes are for my life. During the trip God and I talked about and wrestled over several questions I have about my life.

What is my calling? What is God’s will for my life? Am I in the right place? Do I need to stay or do I need to move? Who am I supposed to love? Is my girlfriend the “one”? Does God desire to bless me? Does God really have a dream for my life beyond what I could ever think or imagine?

Twenty one days with over 50 hours in a quiet car and I can tell you I really don’t think I am any closer to knowing answers to those questions now than before I left. Am I frustrated or disappointed? Absolutely not.

God didn’t give me the answers, but I did learn one really big lesson: a life of following Christ and living in God’s will is meant to be an adventure. It does not guarantee certainty and is more likely to be a life of uncertainty.

It seems too often I think that following Christ or living in God’s will for my life means I will know all the answers to my questions. The reality is God wants me to move forward in what I do know while trusting Him to take care of the rest. I do know I am called to love God and love others. Really that is all I know and basically, beyond that, it’s in God’s hands. It sounds rather pathetic at first but that is the real exciting part!

In the world of uncertainty comes a divine adventure with the God of this universe who is infinitely creative and good.

It is so easy for me to put false security in my own strength, my own abilities, my own determination when I think God calls me out of what is certain into what is uncertain. As this happens, I cannot rely on myself and I truly need to have trust and faith in Him. I realized I desire to witness miracles in my life but I never put myself in a context for them. I never let go of my own security to utterly and completely put my security into the hands of God. It’s almost like how can God perform a miracle if I never give Him the chance.

One of my main prayers over the past several weeks was that God would turn my world upside down as I put everything I hold dear into His hands. This was not easy to pray or do. I gave Him my career aspirations, I gave Him my dreams, I gave Him the love I have for my girlfriend and gave Him many other things. Again, it was not easy.

I truly felt like I imagine Abraham felt when God told him to go but did not give him a direction or did not tell him where to go. Can you imagine what that would have been like? Talk about a life of uncertainty. How did he do it?

I believe he trusted that God loved Him God and would take care of Him. In the end, that is all I can do as well...trust that God loves me and will take care of me like He promises. I am sure this will be a lifelong learning process but to say the least, I have witnessed a few miracles in my life the past few weeks.

In short, I now try to take each day for what it truly is...an adventure.

DisEaster

2009-04-07T12:42:00.000-07:00

A not-so-clever play on words for you. But, it's about the feeling I get each year around this time. Either that Easter week is actually just a big disaster, or that it's some kind of disease afflicting people.

One of my wise friends once said that he feels more spiritually attacked on Easter week than any other week of the year. It sounds a bit far-fetched at first, but given what Easter is really about, it would make sense that Satan would do his best to derail us in a time like this.

[If anyone replies saying, "Why would Satan be upset about bunnies and colored eggs?" you're going to get a virtual smack upside the head.]

But seriously, for the past few years especially, on the week when I am supposed to be celebrating the resurrection and life of Jesus, the son of the living God, I've been nothing but miserable. Every petty little annoyance will get to me, every miniscule worry can bring me down, and it takes everything I have to just sit down and read God's word at night, much less pray and mean it. And I loathe feeling like this. Given all I have to be thankful for, I feel such an ungrateful scum moping around like every problem I have is worse than everyone else's.

Maybe it's being busy with worship music that doesn't give me time to just relax and recooperate. Maybe my friend was right and Satan really is tempting me away from my normal flow of life and into a despression. Who knows?

All I know is, despite the crappy feeling this week may bring for some of us, there are angels around us just waiting to us to give them a chance. If this week gets to you the way it does me, just remember that God is always alive in your brothers and sisters. Open up, tell them how you feel, and let God in.

If any of you cross paths with me this week, and I seem less than chipper, you have my permission to remind me of this! :)

To Support, or Lead to Sin?

2009-03-31T09:47:00.000-07:00

Normally I’m a person that’s quick to try to see the big picture of things. I don’t often get hung up on one particular bad period or bad situation because I know, deep down, that God’s up to something. People often comment about how lax I am about everything, and truthfully, that’s why. I see no point in getting worked up over things that, 1) I have no control over, and 2) Are probably being done for a very good reason well outside of my sphere of understanding.

I don’t know why, but it’s always come naturally to me. So when I say that, right now, I feel like I’m at my wit’s end, I want you to know exactly what I mean.

What do you do when your heart is breaking so badly for someone that you want nothing more than to support them, but supporting them would mean contradicting your faith in Christ?

My family life was never quite normal. My parents parted ways when I was 10, and have both since remarried. However, due to some serious issues from his past creeping back up on him, my dad was recently admitted to and released from a rehabilitation clinic. Although I was sad he fell so far to have to wind up in a place like that, I have never been prouder of him. Seeing him become man after God’s heart and God’s will has been one of the most encouraging things I’ve seen in my brief 26 years here. I am proud to call him my dad, and I love him with all my heart.

However, as far as he’s come, everything isn’t all peaches. Although I certainly don’t know all the details, I do know that his wife has had an incredibly hard time understanding and dealing with his addiction, and it’s really torn them apart over the past half year. And now, they’re facing a divorce.

If you aren’t familiar with what it’s like living with an addiction, think of it like a way to not deal with real life. Anytime you have to do something, have to make a decision, have to go to work, have to deal with people, or anything other than what you would do in paradise, your first instinct is to run to your addiction. Problems pile up quickly because they choose to ignore real life and indulge in a substance or behavior that gratifies them instantly and helps ease the stress and pain.

As you can imagine, overcoming a pattern like this takes an indescribable amount of self-discipline and immeasurable amount of support and patience from loved ones. So, with that in mind, I can easily see why their marriage is suffering.

I want my dad to continue to keep his life in order. He has come so far since last year. He has made new friends who share his struggle and support him. He attends meetings and talks to others regularly to continue learning. He’s even started reading the Bible and pursuing God, which is something I never thought I’d be able to share with my dad.

But, for whatever reason, he feels that his marriage is dragging him down instead of building him up. And with that in mind, I want nothing more than to support him and tell him to make every sacrifice he needs to in order to keep from falling back into the pit he’d fallen into last year.

But on the other hand, I’ve come to see God’s answer for marital issues is rarely, if ever, divorce. That’s not a topic I think I need to give much thought to, because it’s pretty clearly stated throughout the Bible.

What do I do? How do I encourage my dad to continue to seek God and keep his life in order when I don’t, at my core, support what he’s about to do? How can I say that I think he SHOULD get a divorce, even though I believe it’s not the right answer? Could I even justify urging a brother in Christ to something that I firmly believe is sinful if it meant preventing a multitude of future sins?

So, yea, any words of wisdom are sure welcome… *sigh*

Break My Heart for What Breaks Yours

2009-03-19T09:55:00.000-07:00

I don’t think I’ve ever learned so much about myself in one time period as when I briefly saw a Christian counselor back in late 2008. I initially went because I had a horrible relationship with my mother at the time (which has gotten back on track, thank God). But, in working through that issue with my mom, I ended up spending a session with my counselor talking about communication levels.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with them, I’ll do my own paraphrase (they exist in many formats, but they’re all similar):

Superficial – The things we say that we put basically no thought or intentions into. The “Hi, how are you?” and “Good, how are you?” that you hear 900 times a day in the elevator at work.

Factual – Basically like your Facebook or Twitter status. After the superficial level, we’ll often move to things like “So what’s new?” or “How is your job going?” Again, very little thought is required at this level of interaction.

Evaluative – This is where a person starts to become defined to another. We can share our opinions, goals, dreams, desires, etc. Normally, agreement at this level is the basis for the start of a friendship, and disagreement, vice versa.

Emotional – If two people are comfortable sharing opinions with one another, even if they don’t necessarily agree on all points, they may be more comfortable moving further and sharing emotions with one another. Typically, women move to this level much more easily than men.

Communal – The level at which two people are so emotionally intertwined that they actually feel the emotions of the other with mutual intensity. Ideally, this is the level at which married couples would communicate.

I loved talking about these. Having these variable definitions of communication between people allowed me to get a better understanding of the relationship I had with EVERYONE in my life. From the coworker who only ever discusses weather and politics, down to the MySpace pen-pal who knows the deepest, darkest voids of my heart. And having those things in mind, I was able to see more clearly why the relationships existed as they did. I loved learning about how we tend to match communication levels with people, and how we tend to seek out people who will easily move to the level at which we’re most comfortable talking.

However, I was particularly interested in those relationships that somehow managed to cross the level at which I was genetically predisposed to remain: Evaluative.

So, out of curiosity, I asked my counselor what enabled people to move from Evaluative communication to Emotional communication. And consequently, from Emotional to Communal. His answer is something that has profoundly impacted my relationship with God ever since:

Frequency

And like that, my relationships with my closest friends, as well as my relationship with Jesus, were put into a sharply-focused perspective. Frequency, it’s that simple. We learn to trust our closest friends through frequency of sharing our opinions, thoughts, emotions, feelings, etc. When we share those things on those deeper levels with people everyday, it comes more naturally to us.

And suddenly, I realized why I felt so distant from God sometimes. How often was I making time for him? And to what level of communication was I going?

What is your relationship with God like? Is it one in which you might have a casual thought or two about him once a week or so? Is your Bible reading a quick thumb through that never really sinks in? Is your prayer life on the level of thanking God for the same things you thank him for every time (ie: you don’t even think about it)?

Or, are you in a communal relationship with God? Do you frequently talk to God about every thought or feeling that crosses your mind or heart, no matter how painful or discouraging it may be? When you read his word, do you give it your utmost attention and earnestly seek to understand what God is saying to you? When you pray, are you reaching down deep to the things that your heart desires most, and trusting God to make good on those prayers?

Back to Basics

2009-03-11T06:58:00.000-07:00

So, as I may have previously mentioned, I’m not the hugest fan of uncensored public forums on the internet in which any uneducated Joe Schmoe can get on his soapbox. But of course, it’s that same freedom that lets me do this each week, so I’ll live and let live I guess… :)

But, earlier this week, a friend of mine sent me a link to an article about how less and less of the country is identifying itself as “Christian” in the traditional sense and how the people drawn to religion-less organizations like [some] mega-churches is absolutely skyrocketing. On one hand, I totally identified with the article. I sure didn’t grow up a Christian, and what initially drew me to Christ wasn’t the fact that taking my hat off to pray made sense, or that I just had this inkling that I was more holy for doing some obscure version of pew-aerobics during the sermon, but the simple fact that Christ was the epitome of love laid down for others.

But, on the other hand, I clicked the red X in the corner of the window with a heavy dose of dismay. Because see, I couldn’t help but read a few of the comments left by anonymous internet pirates at the bottom of the page - the kind of comments that make you glad that the people can’t see your face when you read them.

Rather than talking about the topic of the article, the comments quickly deteriorated into debates about the validity of Christianity as a whole. Which, as a minor aside, I LOVE [loathe] when a single person thinks he or she has the logic and mental capability to refute our entire history of religious tradition and thought. The notion that one person knows better than hundreds of religious scholars who have influenced the way we approach Christ today is simply the pinnacle of DUH!

Anyway, back on topic…

Despite my dry heaving, I couldn’t help but notice that a majority of the comments were aimed at things like the timeframe in which God created the universe, how God first created man, and [this is my favorite] a rabid rejection of Christianity on the sole basis that God making Eve from Adam’s rib was too difficult to grasp. The people arguing against Christianity were focusing so intently on the miraculous and unimaginable things that God did that they never even bothered to say a single word about Jesus himself.

And, with that, I couldn’t help but wonder…

What are we doing so wrong that the unbelieving world only sees God’s magic tricks? At what point did we stop communicating the simple fact that Christ was HUMAN? To everyone who doesn’t know Jesus, are we just silly people who want to believe in a God who can snap his almighty fingers and answer our misguided prayers? Why don’t people get that it’s about Jesus, and nothing else?

I mean, from a purely argumentative standpoint, we can debate whether the story of Adam and Eve was literal or allegorical until we’re blue in the face. But at the end of the day, despite the fact that none of us will ever know if we’re right or wrong, will it ultimately make what Jesus said or did untrue? I mean, let’s say God didn’t actually make Adam from the dust of the earth, Eve from his rib, or a garden for them to live in. Let’s say that God never actually spoke to Abraham commanding him to sacrifice his son, or that Moses’ parting of the sea was nothing more than a timely gust of wind. Is our faith in Jesus totally bunk based on those things?

But, back in the bigger picture, why are those things the subject of so much debate, and why is Jesus so often left out of the picture as if he was just an accessory in the grand scheme of the Bible? It seems that people need to be able to grasp the concept of God having superhuman powers before they will even consider the fact that Jesus may, in fact, have been who he said he was. And to an extent, that’s so silly. That would be like me demanding that a person explain all of his quirks, personality traits, habits, and opinions before I decide whether or not we can be friends. But, in reality, it’s often the opposite, right? We befriend people, and the parts of them that may have been tough to stomach in the beginning tend to fade into the background. Why is it not that way with God and Jesus?

As with so many other things in life, I don’t know the right answer. I really wish I did, but I don’t. I know that when people ask me about my faith, I’m going to talk about Jesus’ model for our lives and how it’s nothing but awe-inspiring. I’m going to talk about how his limitless endurance in everything he did inspires me to be a better man. And I’ll definitely say that my life is a million times better now than it was when I tried to get all the answers on my own.

From there, I can only hope and pray that my conversation partner managed to see the point of it all.

A Question from Justin, Vision Night, and Other Stuff.

2009-03-09T08:04:00.000-07:00

Hey everybody, Justin here.

I've been thinking about ways I can be easily accessible to all you Immersionites in case you ever have a need to connect, be it prayer requests, concerns, or just time to chat. How to do that with 250-300 weekly has been, of course, a challenge. But alas, we live in a time unlike any else where communication is no longer limited by space (or time, for that matter.)

Then I started thinking about how my professors in college used to have office hours. You know, they'd put on the syllabus things like, "Office Hours: 2-2:01 pm. Must call ahead for appointment." (Something tells me they never liked having office hours. Maybe it was the fact that those hours consisted of cranky students wanting a better grade? I digress. . . .) Then I started thinking, "What if I had office hours, but if instead of being physically located in an office, I held 'virtual office hours'? What would that look like?"

All that to say, recently I came across a site that I've really been digging and have started to use it to communicate to our Team Leaders on weekly basis. The site is TokBox.com and it's really sharp. Amongst other things, it allows for group chat rooms and individual video chats. (Oh yeah, it's a regular instant messaging service as well.) Check out my page here.

Technical specs aside, my question to you is this: Would you utilize "virtual office hours" if I had them? What if I blocked out a certain set of hours during the week to be "e-vailable" to you on TokBox? Would you "stop by" for a video chat over your lunch hour? Would you share a prayer request over IM? What if we had a "group prayer" session online where you could see 15 other Immersionites via webcam? Would you benefit from something like this?

Basically it boils down to being available for all of you who consider Immersion "home." With all of us being scattered all over different parts of the city (and country and world, according to the webcast!), I have found that being online is one of the easiest ways to connect with people. Let me know in the comments if this would be of value to you. Just a thought.

In closing, I want to leave you with the video webcast from last week's Vision Night. We met on 3.03.09 to discuss what God was doing in Immersion and how we could all play a part in that. How we could continuously be immersed in Christ, immersed in community, and immersed in culture. The quality isn't all that great, but you'll get the gist of what went on.

Wrestling with God

2009-03-04T14:30:00.000-08:00

Today I do not have any real thoughts to offer so please allow me to just share a little of my current adventure with God. I am in the midst of quite a wrestling match with Him.

To say the least, I have been under spiritual attack the past few weeks as you can tell from my blog last week. In many ways I am still in the midst of a dark storm feeling really lost, but the past few days I have been full of joy. The turnaround came later in the evening on Ash Wednesday just after I wrote my last blog called “The Eye of the Storm”.

During this season of Lent I gave up a very significant love of mine. (Please know I am not writing about this to brag about myself and my only intention is to encourage you with what God is doing in my life through these 6 weeks.) I really did not even like the idea of a fast at first. I’ll even admit the motive at first was to please someone else and it really was not for me. It has not been easy and I struggle every day with temptations to break the fast. But wow...my eyes have been opened and now I realize how much I actually needed this time to focus on God.

Feeling lost, I’ve been asking God where should I go, what should I do, who am I to be and who is the one to be next me. Those really seem to be surface level questions, but I want to have more passion in life, more meaning, and more fulfillment. I am really wrestling with Him right now on an even deeper level: I’m asking Him what is my purpose here and now. Trust me...I don’t just get down on my hands and knees and pray like a good little Christian kid. I wrestle with God and I actually get frustrated and angry with Him sometimes.

Now before I go any further I will say I know the Christian cliché answer is my purpose is to love and serve God and bring glory to Him in all that I do. I have heard that answer from Christian circles all my life. And all I want to say to them right now is...really? Is it really that simple? I feel really lost in so many ways right now and that answer just does not seem to be enough. I need something more...something more tangible...something more real. Maybe that is the answer and I just need to discover that for myself (which may be what God is wanting to teach me right now), but I’ll be honest and say I don’t like that answer right now.

I’ve started reading Rick Warren's Purpose Driven Life book for the first time. I know the book has been around for years now, but in the past it has actually been something I have tried to avoid reading. However, it seems to fit perfectly with what I am searching for right now since it is based on a 40 day schedule of asking God questions about one’s purpose. I'll give it a try anyways. Through the book and many other things God has been teaching me some amazing things even in just this first week. I certainly don’t have any answers yet, but I am excited to see what God has in store for me in the weeks ahead.

Help me out. Tell me...what is your purpose in life? What motivates you to get up day in and day out?

BML

2009-03-03T12:37:00.000-08:00

http://www.fmylife.com/

I guess that given most of the unintelligible drivel you can find in the public sector of the internet, it shouldn’t surprise me that a website like this exists. But, nonetheless, I find myself pretty discouraged by it.

When did we become so sad that we needed an entire website devoted to the most depressing, miserable, unfortunate, and even heartbreaking moments of our lives? Furthermore, given that the aforementioned moments are undesirable, why would we want to share them with others in such a way that they’re allowed to judge whether or not we were justified in saying “F my life!” or if we’re just whiners?

Yes, we all have bad moments, and a lot of us have pretty significant problems that we’d rather not laugh about. But wow, is that really all the basis we have with which to connect with each other anymore? Can you imagine if every conversation you had were only about drivers cutting you off, a waitress spilling hot coffee on your lap, or getting fired from a job for stealing food they were going to throw out anyway?

Personally, I’m quite tired of the negativity in the air as it is. The economy, the skeptics about our new president, tax season, winter being too cold, gas prices slowly rising again. It seems like so much of our media and daily conversation is comprised of nothing more than a finely-focused lens on depressing issues and just general complaining.

What if there was a website that did the opposite? How encouraging would it be to read about selfless, humble, honest, loving people improving the lives of those around them and asking nothing in return for it? Would you like to open your email each morning to read stories about how a stranger behind you at Starbucks paid for your drink when you forgot your money in the car? I know I sure would.

How about Bless My Life instead? http://bmylife.com/ It can work twofold as a way of saying “God, be my life,” and as a way to say, “Bless my life!” by focusing on the blessings you have (even though they may seem few) amidst all the things you’d rather not deal with.

Honestly, if someone out there is familiar enough with web page development and at all interested in pursuing something like this, I’d be first in line to help get this site started.

The Eye of the Storm

2009-02-25T03:47:00.000-08:00

Whether you’re a Christian or not reading this, have you ever had those days and nights in your life where nothing seems to be working for you? Where you feel completely lost and totally confused? Well, I have been having one of those months and I just had one of those nights. It is about 5:00 in the morning as I start writing this and I have not slept a wink all night and I’m actually at the office to just start working when I finish writing this. It is going to be a long day.

I have been wrestling with God about a great number of things tonight. Please allow me to be extremely vulnerable and personal in this post. Yes, I am a full blown “sold out to Christ” Christian, but I feel really lost right now.

I don’t know who I am supposed to be in life, I don’t know where I am supposed to go in life, I don’t know who I want to walk along side me in life. I just don’t know. So I was up all night asking God some really hard questions and frankly getting sort of upset at Him. Then I became even more frustrated because I realize that God is probably trying to give me the answers but I probably don’t even know how to listen for the answers. I am so very confused, broken, and frustrated.

I heard this song called “One Thing” by Paul Coleman earlier tonight on the radio. It is one of my favorites, but today it really hit home for me. I made bold the things that really resonate with me right now.

Well Here I am In a river of questions
Can I pour my heart out to a listening ear?
Well I see this life
Its valley’s and mountains
And I think of all the roads that brought me here
Oh that brought me here
Walkin' down, walkin' down those roads

Well I’ve questioned my reasons
This life I’m living
I’ve questioned my ability
To judge wrong from right
Well I’ve questioned all the things I’ve ever called certain
My race, my religion, my country, my mind

Chorus 1: But the one thing I don’t question is You
You really love me like you say you do
You really love me like you say you do
So hold me, 'cause I need you
Hold me

Well I’ve questioned my significance
Meaning and relevance
Does the work I’m doing really matter at all?
Well I’ve questioned my friendships
Alliance, dependence
Who will still be here when I fall?

Chorus 2: But the one thing I don’t question is You
You really love me like you say you do
Yea the one thing I don’t question is You
You really love me like you say you do
So hold me, (come on now) hold me
Hold me, (come on, I need your love)
Hold me...

Only one thing doesn’t change
Only one thing stays the same
All I know at the end of the day is your love remains

I know I have a great number of questions right not but I suppose I don’t really question God. I know he will be here for me and will make things clear in time. I did seem to get one answer from Him when I was asking why I am going through all this. The answer seemed to come as He gave me a mental picture of a hurricane.

I feel so surrounded by the storms of this life right now just like a hurricane. The strong winds surround me and are beating me down. I can’t see which way to go and feel so lost. To be honest, I’m a little scared.

Then it hit me and I know it was God talking to me. It just clicked.

At the center of the hurricane in which they call the “eye” there is great peace and I can have clear vision in one direction which is up...toward God. I feel so lost and surrounded by life’s storms but I fully believe I can look up and know God is looking right down on me. I just can’t stop looking up and I can trust He will give me peace in the eye of the storm...

Thank you God. I still love you. (Even though I was mad at you last night.)

I want it my way, and I want it... whenever! :)

2009-02-24T09:46:00.000-08:00

I only have 26 minutes and 43 seconds to write this, so I’m going to be as efficient as possible.

Yes, that was a stab at our culture.

Lately I’ve been reading a pretty cool book called Ministering Cross-Culturally: An Incarnational Model for Personal Relationships. The author, Sherwood Lingenfelter, talks a lot about breaking down cultural barriers in inter-cultural relationships and ministry, and it’s really helped me put my life as an American (and especially as a Christian) in perspective. It’s a life-long battle to try to see the world through God’s eyes, and when we can strip away the biases and influences of our own culture, it helps that much more!

One thing that Lingenfelter did that really struck me was to compare a time-based culture (America in a nutshell) to an event-based culture. In America, everything is about time. We make the most of it when we have it, and we never seem to have enough of it. Investments in technology help us become more efficient with our time. We conduct business through email and telephone to make things happen faster. We have clocks everywhere so that our rigid schedules are adhered to down to the minute.

However, obviously not everyone in the world works like we do. Lingenfelter spent several years as a missionary in a Pacific Island state called Yap, where time matters little, and events matter most. He gave many examples of how time doesn’t matter in the Yapese culture, including most “scheduled” events beginning 2-3 hours late on average, as well as local movie theaters waiting for a full crowd to begin showing a film.

As an American, this sounds ludicrous, right? If an usher came into a movie theater and told the customers that they were going to wait an hour to allow more people the time to arrive, most of the movie viewers would get upset almost instantly and probably demand their money back. But in Yap, this is common. They’re more concerned that the movie be seen at all than when it is seen.

But there was one example that blew my mind. It wasn’t so much the example itself, but the way that Lingenfelter explained the attitude of the man in the story. He said that in the village where he lived, he watched a man take two years to build a new house for his family by hand.

Is two years an incredibly long time to build a house by yourself? Maybe? But this is what I liked. He said that the man would just decide to take two days off of working on his house to go fishing. Or if his neighbors needed his help, he had no problem dropping what he was doing to lend a hand. The man had no reason to rush. He just knew that he wanted a new house for his family, but it wasn’t important that it be anytime soon.

Is that as inspiring to you as it is to me? The man’s primary objective could take a backseat at any time that he so chose. He didn’t ruin relationships or burn himself out in a race to the finish. He enjoyed every step of the way and did what he wanted, when he wanted.

Now, this IS a ministry blog, so let’s bring it back to Jesus. Remember the story of Lazarus? Jesus said he would heal Lazarus. But, Jesus didn’t make it back to Lazarus in time to heal him, and he died. When he arrived, Jesus was rebuked by the friends and family of Lazarus who said that if only Jesus had gotten there sooner, Lazarus would be alive now. However, as we all know, Jesus brought Lazarus back from the dead, fully-healed, just as he promised.

As Americans, how often are we like those people who got upset with Jesus? How often are we so blinded by the perceived importance of time that we lose sight of the big picture? Have you set an unrealistic goal for yourself to lose weight after New Year’s? Do you keep in touch with most of your friends with your phone? Or maybe you’re upset that God hasn’t given you a spouse in your early twenties like everyone else.

Do you have the eternal perspective to understand that, although achieving goals is important, quality of time spent is as well? Do you know that, once God fulfills the desires of your heart, because you’re so spiritually-filled, you will be able to look back and laugh about all the time you spent worrying? I know I’ve done that before!

Obviously we can’t turn our culture on its head, or even remove ourselves from it. But, I know that stories like this are always great reminders for me. I can rest easy knowing that God WILL deliver on my prayers. That doesn’t mean it will be tomorrow, nor does it mean it will be 10 years from now. But he knows the desires of my heart, he hears my prayers, and he came so that I would live life abundantly. With my time, I "plan" to let God do just that.

Dang, that took me almost 40 minutes… Oh well… :)

Thanks... I think?

2009-02-18T08:17:00.000-08:00

This is not going to be a well-planned entry by any stretch. This topic literally came to me this morning a matter of hours ago, and having had very little time to think about it, I don’t have many of the important details sorted out. But, I’m just going to throw what I have out there and hope I might stir up some controversy… :)

I realize it sounds cliché to say this to a certain extent, but I’m not the kind of person to lie about my shortcomings. So when I say that I don’t like accepting praise for things that I firmly believe I would not have been able to do without God’s grace, I mean every word of it.

I’ll use my involvement in the worship ministry as an example. This is a little-known fact in the church community, but a LOT of us musicians (not all, but a lot) honestly don’t like being told what an awesome job we did after a service. Being that each and every one of us is a flawed human being, it’s always a struggle for us to remember that we’re playing our instruments to and for God alone. But being told that we did such a great job in a song, although the compliment is no doubt heart-felt, is somewhat counterproductive. It takes something we brought to God as a prayer and offering, and turns it into something to puff up our own egos. It’s pretty tough to not let those kinds of things go to your head sometimes.

Through that lens, it’s equally frustrating to never hear the same people who would compliment a worship musician for a job well-done offer a single piece of gratitude to those who ran sound, set up the stage, served communion, prayed for people during the service, or even set up the coffee and snacks before the whole night went down. Not a one of us who serves God through volunteering in a ministry wants human praise for what we do, and I’m willing to bet that it would be pretty awkward if someone came up to a greeter and said, “Wow, you did an excellent job shaking people’s hands tonight!”

Now, I don’t mean to pick on anyone. Like I said, I realize that the compliments given are coming from a place of good intentions, but I wanted to expose the issue for all of us to think about a little bit. There are a million and a half questions to ask about this kind of thing, so I’m not even going to try to do justice to them. Instead, I’d much rather see some kind of discussion if people would be so bold as to post! ;)

When you’re complimenting someone, are you thinking about why you’re really doing it? Are you doing it because you appreciate what they brought to the ministry as a whole, or are you doing it to get on their good side? Are you offering the same praise to other people who work just as hard for the ministry, or are you swayed by a bias?

When you’re on the other end, receiving a compliment, where does it end up in your heart? Does it make you feel, “Oh, wow, finally SOMEONE appreciates me!” or, is it more rightly something like, “Well, God really deserves the gratitude, not me.”? Is your satisfaction in your servitude contingent upon human praise, or are you fully serving God with what you do?

As I said, I sure don’t have all the answers. Though, I’ll suggest that if you’re out to offer praise to someone, it’d be best to thank God for that person’s heart as well. And if you’re frequently receiving compliments for your servitude in the church, well then, thanks are also due to God for your gifts and abilities that have allowed you to serve in such a way.

Jesus IS that In to You

2009-02-12T08:24:00.000-08:00

Cheesy title...but it's only been in the past year that I've come to accept this truth: The Creator of the Universe is in Love with ME. Say that to yourself...

I read this passage from Genesis 29 this past weekend and it made me think of my own past relationships:

31 When the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, he enabled her to have children, but Rachel could not conceive. 32 So Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said "The Lord has noticed my misery, and now my husband will love me."

33 She soon became pregnant again and gave birth to another son. She named him Simeon, for she said, "The Lord heard that I was unloved and has given me another son."

34 Then she became pregnant a third time and gave birth to another son. She named him Levi, for she said "Surely this time my husband will feel affection for me, since I have given him 3 sons!"

35 Once again, Leah became pregnant and gave birth to another son. She named him Judah, for she said, "Now I will praise the Lord!" And then she stopped having children.

Now granted, I have no children, but as a woman, I can totally relate to Leah's situation. We feel unloved, lonely, or scared we actually might end up alone, and so we manipulate circumstances or become someone we are not in order to gain affection, in an effort to feel loved and accepted. Looking back on most of my signficant dating relationships, I often compromised my values and lowered my standards in order to gain the love and affection of a particular guy I wanted to be in a relationship with. I desperately wanted someone to really get to know who I was and what I believed in. Someone who understood my hopes and dreams and fears and walked along side of me. Someone who pursued me with interest and was willing to go to great lengths to ensure my happiness.

I never realized it at the time, but what I was searching for all those years was God Himself. So it's no surprise to me that I never really knew myself until I knew God. This idea of a relationship with Jesus - it was completely foreign to me. For all the years I had been going to church, I never understood that the Creator of the universe wanted a relationship with me. I could've saved myself a lot of heartache if I had learned this earlier...

Is it possible this was God's plan all along? Maybe He knew exactly what it was going to take for me to accept His love, so He let me take my sweet time going after what I thought I wanted, only to end up with a bad ending every time.

I have to say I'm not where I thought I'd be at my age. But most importantly, I am learning who I am in the Lord's eyes and trying faithfully to follow His will for my life. It's not easy because the world tells me I am someone else - that I should look a certain way, act a certain way, that I should get nervous because I'm almost 30 and not even close to being married...

As women (myself included!), we need to do a better job at allowing Christ to be the One who fills our cups. We need to get out of the mindset that we need a man to bring any sense of excitement to our lives. We need to stop basing our sense of self-worth on whether or not a guy is interested in us. We need to focus on becoming who Christ says we are and who He created us to be, so that we are ready when He decides it's time to bring us the man chosen for us... the one who will be the overflow in our cup.

Do you have a "Junk Drawer"?

2009-02-11T10:06:00.000-08:00

My family had a junk drawer when I was growing up. It was the place we put all things that did not have a home elsewhere in the house. The drawer was full of miscellaneous trinkets and broken little contraptions and random things one would need once every 10 years or so. I think most people know what I am talking about. Now I don’t have a drawer, but I have a box shoved under my bed.

Why do we hide those items away? I suppose it is to keep the surfaces around us in our kitchens or rooms cleaner. It is so people (including ourselves) don’t have to see or deal with the junk. Interestingly enough, we know right where the junk drawer is and it usually the first place we check for the random item we need. Yet, we really never enjoy digging through the stuff and for some our drawer is so full things fall out when it is opened.

I think it will be obvious where I am headed with this but please follow me to the end. Here comes the transition....wait for it...wait for it: many of us have a junk drawer within our hearts as well. It is where we put the life experiences many of us don’t know what else to do with. All of us have made mistakes, but some of us have made really huge mistakes – ones we want to hide the rest of our life. The drawer might even contain wounds we carry from others who have hurt us. The thing about the junk drawer in our hearts is we know exactly where it is at and what is in there and we certainly don’t want others to see it.

I don’t want to come across as “preaching” today, but rather as one who struggles with this as well. I am realizing when we have a junk drawer in our hearts it prohibits us from loving with all our hearts because part of it is hidden away. We are not able to love God with all our heart and we are not able to love those around us with all our heart. We guard ourselves from vulnerability but in turn we guard ourselves from those who love us.

We say to ourselves “no one will love me if they knew the stuff in my drawer.”

That is a lie.

It is simply not true.

When we put things in our junk drawer we do not even let Jesus Christ love us. He already knows all the junk...the junk from our past, the junk we are in right now, and even all the junk in our future. Yet, He does not want us to put the junk in a drawer where we hide it and carry it and let it weigh us down.

What are we to do with it?

Jesus wants it.

Give the junk to him.

All of it.

Even the stuff that is buried so far down in the drawer that it hurts beyond words to bring it out.

I could go on and on with this but I don’t want to preach. I myself have tears in my eyes as I write this knowing I still have my own junk to give to Jesus. It is not easy and I will not pretend that it is, but let me tell you from personal experience that it is so, so, so much better once we give it to Jesus.

We are to have faith like a child, right? Well, when I was a little kid I remember I loved to go find stuff in the junk drawer and play with it to the dismay of my parents. The “junk” would be all over the house if it had been up to me, but I had fun with the stuff and found such joy in it.

Can we have that kind of faith with the things in our junk drawers?

Can we believe God can use them to bring us joy in life?

I believe so because it has been true in my life even though I am so often quick to forget. I have made some serious mistakes and deal with some serious wounds, yet God has used them for good in my life and I can celebrate what He has done in and through my “junk”. I know it sounds Christian cliché but it is true. I get so excited when I need a little tool or trinket or some random item and I find I have had it stuffed away for years in my junk box under my bed. It is a great feeling to have the perfect little tool or item for the time when you need it. Give your junk over to Jesus and allow Him to give you joy where there has been fear, shame, and condemnation. I guarantee you he will use your “junk” in exciting and miraculous ways you never would have dreamt imaginable.

I know this from my own experiences.

Don’t take my word for it. Here are some promises for you:

Galations 2:20, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,who have been called according to his purpose. (“All” means all and that is all “all” means!!!!)

Vulnerability

2009-02-11T07:22:00.000-08:00

I can’t remember where I first heard it, but this quote has been ringing like a bell choir in my head for weeks now:

Love is giving someone the power to hurt you, and trusting that they won’t.

Maybe it’s just me, though I doubt it, but it seems like it’s a pretty big deal when someone knows the depths of your heart these days. And by depths, I mean information that could collapse you into a ball of tears if someone were to use it against you - some of the most humiliating and depressing things you’ve come to experience in your life. It takes a heck of a lot of trust in someone to be comfortable giving them that kind of power, doesn’t it?

At first, I wanted to think that it was a quote that really only applied to our societal format where we’re very inwardly-focused, and where we all walk around with a thick coat of verbal armor should anyone try to expose the parts of us that we don’t like. But it wasn’t until a good friend told me a story yesterday that it really hit me how God used this same model.

Think about what we commonly uphold as divine attributes (God’s characteristics). God was not created, he is the creator. God, in the blink of a figurative eye, could wipe out existence as we know it. It’s only by his will that we are given each breath we take.

So, with that in mind, why even bother with people? Well, I think the aforementioned model of love might lend a good answer to that. In doing what God did through Jesus (ie: become fully human and allow us to hurt him, both physically and emotionally), he extended his own vulnerability to us.

Chew on that for a second. The creator of the universe, that could end our existences if he so chose to, allowed himself to be vulnerable to us as an expression of love. Jesus’ teachings can be read as “good advice” in one way, but if you really think about how God demanded reparation for sin in the Old Testament, Jesus was effectively saying, “This is how you can betray my love and trust for you, and sin against me.”

And he continues to do so in giving us the freedom to sin and receive his grace. It’s through this model, where we are given the choice, that the love God receives from us is genuine. Were we forced to obey God, there would be no love, because there could be no absence of love.

At this point, I’m sure I’ve said something that has poked or prodded some philosophy buff’s last nerve, so I’ll quit with the extra-biblical implications for now. But as long as we’re here, why not bring it down to Earth? How are you doing in this regard? How vulnerable are you to the people you’re close to?

I’ll lead by example and bluntly say that, for the amount of “friends” I have, I think it’s pathetic how few of them know me on a real personal level. And it’s entirely my own doing. I trust small handful of people in my life with very personal information. I know those people will never hurt me because they’ve proven it time and time again. But to those whom I don’t willingly share my personal life, I’ve developed some kind of “rationale” as to why I don’t. Rationale, at the end of the day, is just a reason for me to continue to be scared.

Perhaps I’m scared of what people will think if they knew that I’d been medicated for clinical depression on more than one occasion. It could be I’m concerned that people will think less of me for having been engaged once upon a time, and ending the relationship and leaving my fiancé in the dust. Maybe I’m petrified to think of how most of Immersion would react if they knew that one of their worship leaders used to be a raging pothead.

Oops…

God Sized Dreams

2009-02-04T06:35:00.000-08:00

Last week I wrote about being a sideliner. My question for you now is: what would you do if you knew you could not fail and money was not an issue? What are your dreams and passions? What are your God given talents and gifts that have been hidden deep down inside you over the years? If you cannot think of anything, I challenge you to list 100 things you love to do. Maybe a few things will come to mind.

Now, what is holding you back?

I suppose when I ask this all of myself...it all boils down to fear. I’m afraid. I’m afraid my dreams are selfish and wrong. I’m afraid God will not support me or encourage me if I pursue them. I’m afraid I will fail. I put God in a box and limit His power and goodness. I am realizing though that if I live life in a mundane world full of false security (a.k.a. the “comfort zone”), I never put myself in a context to let God work miracles.

If we take on a God sized dream, our need for God is heightened and our natural tendency toward self-sufficiency is diminished.

Could you do it? Could you put yourself in a position where you would be utterly and completely dependent on God?

I wonder what was going through the mind of David when he volunteered to fight Goliath. (Check out 1 Samuel 17.) David was just a little shepherd boy, but yet he was the only one willing to step up and fight the giant Goliath. He had to be afraid deep down inside. Yet, I think he knew what he was cable of with God on his side. Everyone around him, including his brothers and the King, probably thought he was crazy and was signing up to commit suicide. However, I think David knew he had been practicing and training with a sling shot day in and day out all his life. God had prepared him and had given him the gifts, talents, and tools to do the job. So finally the King agrees to let David fight but then tries to tell David to use the King’s armor and sword. Basically, he was telling David he needed to do it his way...the worlds way. David tried on the armor and he had to have been thinking, “This is not me. I’m not a soldier. I’m a shepherd boy. I’m going to do it the way I know how and the way God wants me to do it. It may look differently than the way the world would say to do it, but watch this because my God is about ready to rock your world.”

What is your Goliath?

Do you have faith in God like David had?

One final thought: in order to have faith it seems one must first have doubt because if doubt did not exist faith would not be needed.

What do you doubt about God?

Allow faith to take the place of doubt.

What Is Wanted In A Man

2009-01-30T15:44:00.000-08:00

“What is wanted in a man is kindness,” says Proverbs. Doesn’t that seem like a strange thing? You’d think the writer and collector of some of the world’s best known and most studied axioms of wisdom might say, “What is wanted in a man is strength … or aggression … or courage.” Something fierce and warrior-like, seemingly more representative of a man filled with testosterone, called to fight and forage and conquer the world. Kindness seems kind of wimpy, almost non-masculine and old lady-like.

This is what I love about the Bible and partly how I know my faith is true and absolute. I serve a God who turns everything upside down and inside out and does the exact opposite of what is expected and desires the same from us.

Kindness. The Hebrew word for kindness [chesed] is better defined by these three English words: kindness, goodness and faithfulness. Noah Webster was a contemporary of James Strong, author of Strong’s Concordance (the most widely used Bible translation tool). Since English is a living language and in a constant state of flux (think of how the definition of the word gay has changed in the last 20 years), it is helpful to look at Webster’s 1828 Dictionary to get a closer idea of what James Strong meant when he chose those words for his translation.

Kindness means good will; benevolence; that temper or disposition which delights in contributing to the happiness of others, which is exercised cheerfully in gratifying their wishes, supplying their wants or alleviating their distresses; benignity of nature. Kindness ever accompanies love. Goodness, according to Webster, is the state of being good; the physical qualities which constitute value, excellence or perfection; and the moral qualities which constitute Christian excellence; moral virtue; religion. Faithfulness is defined as fidelity; loyalty; firm adherence to allegiance and duty; as the faithfulness of a subject; Truth; veracity; as the faithfulness of God.

Stitching these together, Proverbs says, “What is wanted in a man is having the character qualities of benevolence (desiring good will for others and wishing for their happiness, supplying their wants or alleviating their distresses) of moral excellence and of virtue, loyalty, truth, and firm adherence to belief. Does that not conjure up a completely different picture? This is why it is so helpful to dig deeper into the Scriptures.

My friend Todd V is a walking, talking Proverbs 19:22 guy. Though he would probably vigorously deny it, eschewing public praise, to me he is a man’s man, steeped in kindness, goodness and faithfulness. Although life has not dealt him an easy hand, He plays his cards with the grace and humility of someone who has been touched by Jesus. He puts the needs of others first, always has a kind and encouraging word, a welcoming smile and a heart to serve. And he never calls attention to himself or to what he is doing or how he is helping others. But if you watch him, he is always about God’s business.

Immersion is blessed to have men like Todd and the so many other great men- men of faith and virtue and excellence- who are taking the lead in Immersion, in their homes, churches, businesses and communities. How desperately the world needs them! And how desperately do we women need to see and applaud these great men as they step up and into their destinies. According to Webster, kindness ever accompanies love. I do not suppose it an easy task being a “kind” man in today’s harsh, demanding and unforgiving world. But as I said in the beginning, God doesn’t do things the normal or easy way, does He? And neither does He expect different from us.

Are you a sideliner?

2009-01-28T10:29:00.000-08:00

This post will hopefully encourage those of you who are exploring Christianity, but it is geared more to challenge those who have been regular church goers and who...well...need a little kick in the pants.

I so often hear church goers say something to this affect, “My church just does not meet my needs...the worship music is too loud or too boring, the pastor doesn’t preach in a style I like, there is no community, my friends no longer attend, I just don’t fit in, etc...” The complaints usually go on and on. I am often guilty of this myself when sometimes I leave church feeling like I didn’t get anything out of it and it didn’t meet my needs in the way I wanted it to.

Over the past few weeks, God kindly reminded me that I am the church. We...the people...are the church. The church is not the building, the worship music, the programs, the lights, the fancy bells and whistles...it is simply you and me.

We are the church and rather than ask “What did the church do for me?” maybe we need to ask “What did I do for the church?”

What did I do for the person sitting next to me or the new person I have not seen there before? Did I say hi, did I show them Christ’s love, was I acting as the church should act? Even more importantly, how do I act as the church when I leave the building I call “church”?

It seems all too many church goers are completely content to stand on the sidelines and criticize those who are in the game. Sure...it is easy to sit back and say the “church should do this or that” or the “church doesn’t do this or that” when you are just watching from the sidelines. Are you in the game making plays or are you standing on the sidelines? Not everyone will play the same position, but I urge you to get in the game. Yes, you may get bruised and beaten a little but it is so rewarding knowing victory is ours through Christ.

How are you using the gifts and talents God has given you?

Are you watching life from the sidelines or are you living life...seizing every moment and living the life God has called you to live?

What kind of church are you?

This is something I am humbly asking even of myself.

I need to be a better church.

To My Beloved Sisters...

2009-01-27T08:19:00.000-08:00

So there I was last night, enjoying some hot chocolate and a few online conversations with some good friends, when something rather concerning popped up in my little Facebook chat.

“I think I’m too jaded to ever let anyone into my life anymore,” she said without blinking, as if it were a common way to start a conversation.

I inquired for an explanation, and she proceeded to tell me a story of her work life involving the second-level CEO of her company. To the casual observer, he’s got it all. He’s a faithful man with a heart for God. He’s young, but managed to land a very successful job. He has a beautiful wife who loves him to no end. The road was paved smooth for both him and the silver spoon in his mouth. She described him as the person that people 20 years older look at in awe and think, “Wow, I wish I had that!”

But no one else in the company knew him the way she did. My friend proceeded to tell me stories of him grabbing at her underwear when she wasn’t expecting it, or how earlier in the day he obviously and intentionally staring down her shirt to make her feel uncomfortable, then trying to make light of his behavior with a joke. She had confronted him about how inappropriate and degrading it was to her, but her words fell on deaf ears.

Of course, because she’s a close friend of mine, my first instinct was to become disgusted with her CEO’s actions. The way he treats her is absolutely inexcusable by any measure, especially given that he’s married. But, while I definitely felt for her, I wouldn’t have been able to sleep had I not asked her about things she may have been doing to provoke his behavior towards her specifically.

I asked what she chose to wear to work that day, and she showed me a picture. To her, it was a nice sweater that she got a good deal on. “I just got a sweater for $15!” she said. But I explained to her that, as a guy, it was pure potential. It was a low-cut sweater that could turn virtually any upper-body movement into an unsolicited Victoria’s Secret commercial.

As our conversation continued, it revealed an attitude in her that I’d heard from numerous young women before:

“I had no idea he would look at me like that!”
“I just thought it was a cute shirt!”
“I can’t believe men really think that way!”

I’m not out to get on my soapbox about the fashion industry being a horrible influence on the minds of young women, or about men for being irresponsible with their sexual desires, or about women for being naïve regarding how men view them (though, I think all three are equally to blame). Frankly, I’m not a clothier, nor am I a woman, so it would be hard for me to objectively speak about many of the arguments and counter-arguments around this subject.

But, I am a man. I know full well what it’s like to have my eyes closed in prayer to God one minute, and open my eyes to find them straying onto the body of a young woman the next. I am all too familiar with wanting nothing more than to be a good friend to a young woman, but still struggling to not think of her inappropriately because of how undeniably beautiful she is.

So, with that, I aim to lay some hard truths out into the open for the young women who care to read this blog (especially those that are single), in hopes that they will have a better understanding of how men struggle with the things they do, and how they as women can present themselves in a way that’s honoring to both themselves as creations of God, and to God himself.

Truth Number 1: Men Are Dogs

It’s true. Every last one of us. We all struggle with lustful thoughts. If you meet a man who tells you otherwise, then he’s a dog AND a liar. It’s the reason that the verse in Matthew 5 talks about MEN committing adultery in their hearts after having a lustful thought.

The cliché that says men are visual beings is absolutely true. God created us to appreciate beauty, and he created women to be beautiful. It’s one of the many ways that God has perfectly designed us. Yet, it’s also something that can cause a great deal of pain to men and women alike when the appropriate appreciation of beauty isn’t embraced.

It’s difficult to accurately explain this struggle because it’s unlike most others. This isn’t a struggle like swearing or gluttony that are bad habits we learn from the world and can eventually learn not to do; this is a struggle that is built into our very core because of how God made us. It’s a struggle to use what we were given in a proper, God-honoring way. Women are always going to be beautiful, and we’re always going to want to admire them. That part of our brain never shuts off.

And on the subject of brains, I think it serves to make an important distinction here. A man who is being tempted and drawn into lusting after a woman can very well have NO emotional connection to her whatsoever. It is entirely possible (and entirely common, I fear) for a man to indulge himself in careless thoughts about a woman’s physical beauty when he doesn’t even know her name.

So women, please do not make the mistake of believing that because a man is gazing your way more frequently than others that he feels something for you. A lustful gaze is NOT the first sign of love; it’s the first step off a slippery slope of him approaching you for the wrong reasons.

Truth Number 2: You ARE Beautiful

What is somewhat troubling as a guy is that while it’s easy to spot women who are trying very hard to attract attention with their physical features, there are ten times as many women on the opposite end of the spectrum who somehow believe that they are simply unappealing to men in general. Every time I have a conversation with a young woman about modesty and the struggles of men, some sort of self-deprecating belief inevitably rears its ugly head in the form of a phrase like, “I guess I just never thought I was much to look at.”

Let me set the record straight. It’s a lie. It just is.

I can’t count the number of times I have heard a young woman I’ve thought was stunningly beautiful talk about how unattractive she was, and it is always disheartening on so many levels. Obviously it breaks my heart because the undying truth that God created every one of us perfectly has somehow escaped her. But it’s also dangerous because it’s that kind of thinking that leads a young woman to think a discussion of being careful about what she wears is wasted on her. Or even worse, that when a man finally does pay attention to her, he must be the one.

Don’t kid yourself into thinking that you have no need to dress modestly because no one is looking anyway – think again. DO NOT think that just because you find it difficult to see the beauty in yourself that it somehow doesn’t exist, or worse yet, that no one else thinks you’re beautiful.

And if my ramblings don’t get you to reconsider your stance on how you dress, maybe this will:

“For a woman, a great motivation for dressing and looking properly should be that she is jealous for her husband. First Corinthians 7:4 says, "The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband." The Bible says my wife belongs to me. She is my property. I own her. That is really not "politically correct," is it? But it is true. The Bible says it, and I would not want another man to be taking possession, even if only in his mind, of my property. I'm very territorial. There is only one man in the world who has the right to lust after my wife, and that is Me. And when a woman dresses in such a way where she shows her form, she shows her figure, shows her nakedness, what she is doing is taking something that belongs to her husband and giving it to another man. So you may say, "Well, I didn't go to bed with him." No, lady, but you showed him something that didn't belong to him. You showed him something he had no right to see.”

“So a woman, for the love of her husband, should want to be modest. She should want to be dressed appropriately. And by the way, if you are not married, your body still belongs to your husband, whoever he will turn out to be. Therefore, if you go showing it all off because you are not married, you are robbing your future husband. You are taking something that will belong to him and giving it to someone else, and that is not right. So you may say, "Well, I have to show it off to get a husband." You do that, and there is a good chance that you will wind up with the wrong kind of husband.”

“If you dress shamefacedly, then the only thing a man could be attracted to would be your countenance, your face, your character and your personality. It would take quite a man to become attracted to that, because men are not naturally attracted to those things at first. Naturally, the man is attracted to the flesh first, and the rest comes later. So if you can find a man who, without first having seen your body, is attracted to you, you have attracted the right kind of man.”

- www.momof9splace.com

Truth Number 3: You Have a Part to Play Too!

As I said before, there are multiple factors that play into this particular struggle for men. I’ll never deny that men should take every positive step that they possibly can to keep their eyes, minds, and hearts where they belong. But, as the beautiful women that God made you to be, there are things that you can do to both help your brothers in their struggles, as well as command that you be respected and loved in the way God intended.

For starters, if you are still having a hard time choking down the fact that you are beautiful and can be physically desirable, figure out why. Figure out who or what taught you to think less of yourself, label it as a lie, and start telling yourself the truth. This is of the utmost importance because until you believe this about yourself as a daughter of God, taking steps to help young men see you as more than an object of desire will never make sense.

Secondly, challenge what you believe about the way you dress and present yourself. Take a long, hard look at your wardrobe and ask yourself, “Does this present me and my body in a way that honors God and leads young men to appreciate me properly?” If you’re on the fence about a particular piece of clothing, try phrasing the question differently. “Am I comfortable exposing this much of my [body part] to complete strangers?” Because, trust me, if there is something to be seen, men will see it.

On this point, if you’re still coming up empty-handed, to those of you who have men in your lives that you know and trust to be honest with you, I would highly encourage you to consult them. As a guy, I can’t tell you how much it means to us knowing that you want to take positive steps towards being seen in a way that God desires for you. It helps us to stumble less, and it’s reassuring to know that you have the self-respect to demand that you be seen as more than a body. If most guys are anything like me, they would jump at the opportunity to help you present yourself in a God-honoring way.

In Conclusion…

Ok, this has gotten a lot longer than I intended, so I’ll wrap things up at this point. Just know that as brothers in Christ, it absolutely breaks our hearts to see our beloved sisters treated as anything less than the beautiful, perfect creations that we all know you are. So as we take steps to love you in a God-honoring way, I would lovingly challenge you to meet us halfway. Don’t settle for anything less than complete respect and love of who you are as a person and child of God first and foremost.

And one day, if Prince Charming sweeps you off your feet, rest assured knowing that when you’ve invited him to love you in the way you deserve to be loved above all else, the other aspects of your beauty will be fully appreciated as God intended in its appropriate time. And the relationship, having been built on solid rock instead of sand, will endure through thick and thin.

With that, I’ll leave you with the end of my conversation with my good friend who has since made some encouraging choices about how her beauty.

I like to think of myself as a present,
For someone super special to unwrap one day,
And I am careful not to wrap too tight to give away the shape ‘cause then IT’LL RUIN THE SURPRISE!

One Thing CS Lewis and Spiderman Would Agree On

2009-01-16T06:00:00.000-08:00

By design, man is a creature that seeks knowledge. When we are captivated by something, we desire to know more about it. What captivates each of us varies greatly, as do the degrees to which each of us pursues the respective knowledge of said captivators. Some of our desires for knowledge manifest as nothing more than a hobby or way to relieve stress. For others of us, our pursuit of knowledge earns us the label of “gifted” in that particular endeavor. Regardless of these details, the fact that we desire knowledge is undeniable:

At a global level, the desire to answer the most difficult, timeless questions of “Where did we come from?” and “Why are we here?” have fueled countless years of scientific research and philosophical thought.
At a national level, we’ve been enticed by the potential that modern technology contains, and have been led to create some of the most mind-blowing advances that the world has ever seen.
And even at a personal level, our individual passions for knowledge can give us the drive to become an Olympic hurdler or an idol in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.

Our desire to know more, as well as the resulting benefits we obtain from following said desire, are both gifts from God. But like any gift, it must be harnessed and nurtured responsibly. Peter Parker would tell us that “With great power comes great responsibility,” and he would be right on.

Often times, it’s easy to let the fact that we are well-informed about a particular subject change our hearts for the worst. If our egos aren’t contained and our hearts kept in check, we can become highly critical of both ourselves and others, and we can likewise lose the ability to recognize achievement and experience joy in that subject:

To an observer at the finish line, a marathon runner is a pinnacle of human physical achievement. To that same marathon runner, her own performance may have been deemed sub-standard due to her knowledge of other runners, previous race times, and the resulting unrealistic beliefs about herself that may have been in place because of it.
A member of a crowd at a concert may be mesmerized by a guitarist’s performance. The experienced musician standing next to him in the crowd, watching the exact same performance, could be at a loss to find anything impressive about the guitarists work due to his own in-depth understanding of the instrument and music.

As followers of Christ, we must strive to remain humble in all walks of life. We must be humble about our gifts in the light of others, and even humble to ourselves. We must remember that the gifts we have been given are nothing more than that. They were given and can just as easily be taken away.

"A man who is eating or lying with his wife or preparing to go to sleep in humility, thankfulness and temperance, is, by Christian standards, in an infinitely higher state than one who is listening to Bach or reading Plato in a state of pride."
- CS Lewis

Strut It Up

2009-01-13T18:25:00.001-08:00

Rasta Dog got her hairs trimmed necessitating wearing her camo coat when we walk the city streets on these frigid snowy eves. I am embarrassed to tell you she is a clothes horse- or would be if I indulged it. At present she owns only 2 articles of clothing. A black t-shirt with a skull and crossbones (indicating to all dogs in the area that she is one bad you-know-what so watch out- which she decidedly is not) which, if given the option, she would wear day and night and her camouflage coat. I am sure we are a sight. Me bundled up like the abominable snowman with my umbrella open (yes, you read that right) in a futile attempt to shield this poor suffering Jamaican from the northern snowy winds and Rasta Dog in her American Kennel Club camo coat happily treading along. Beauty and the beast and she's the beauty.

A nice thing about growing older is that you no longer care what other people think of you; or at least you care a whole lot less. I used to think it my job to get everyone to like and approve of me. I spent inordinate amounts of time living to try to please others and then growing angry and resentful when I couldn't. Now I realize just how self serving and vain that was and how just plain stupid. People for the most part are pretty wrapped up in themselves and don't care near so much as I'd like to believe about what I think or say or do.

I used to personalize everything. Seeing someone with a crossed look meant I had somehow pissed them off instead of what it probably meant- that they had a fight with their significant other or forgot their checkbook at home or just ate something that didn't agree with them. Now I try to give people space to be and even give them permission not to like me without having to suffer through my annoying attempts at winning them over. I find that I have a lot more peace and I think that comes from finally accepting and liking who I am. I know that sounds like dime store psycho babble but it's true. It has taken me 5 decades to get here but here is a really good place to be. The irony being that this is the fruit of rejection. It took a full force gale of rejection (in the form of divorce) to realize that I am not the sum total of what others think of me but of what God thinks and what I think of me, as determined by Him.

I finally like myself and am comfortable with who I am- warts and all. OK I don't have any warts but I do have wrinkles and extra pounds and some thankfully infrequent but annoyingly boingy gray hairs that stick straight out of this otherwise head of brown. Honestly, I wouldn't trade the now me for the twenty year old version with a killer skinny body and all of life to live still ahead of her because I love the now me and then I did not. Although I wouldn't mind having the option of having them both at the same time.

The now me is funnier, more relaxed and happier. The now me doesn't take myself so seriously that it can't find the humor in dropping a communion plate full of wafers in church two weeks ago and watching it shatter into a million little blue pieces at the exact moment that this herd of people (rushing relentlessly to their cars) is pouring out of the worship center and of course there are no brooms to be found and the maintenance closet is locked. The now me takes those things and weaves colorful stories to amuse others (which, for some reason, I am never at a lack of) instead of hiding in shame and embarrassment.

I guess because I finally love me I can be OK with others who do not. And I think I am freer to love others whether they love me or not. When you stop caring about how you look or how you are going to come across or if you are going to be perceived to be pretty, smart, industrious, successful (fill in the blank) or if you'll be let in that group or invited to that party or liked by that member of the opposite sex; when you just stop caring about all that and put it down- the suffocating need to be loved- you are set free to care about what is important- God and the people He has placed in your life. And astonishingly, when you truly love others, you find yourself loved in return, boingy gray hairs and all.

Rasta Dog and I are going to strut it up tonight when we hit the downtown sidewalks and streets for the final night's peruse, snow and arctic air be darned. Watch out Des Moines- here comes the crazy Jamaican umbrella lady and the deaf dog with the camo coat and aren't they lookin' mighty fine!

God Knows Me

2009-01-07T05:46:00.000-08:00

I have been reading the book Knowing God by J. I. Packer. It is a theology book about God and is rather deep...at least for me. (Please understand I am not the type to read such books regularly...especially to brag about the complex things I read...but I humbly admit I am only reading this book as I am fascinated in learning more about God.)

I often find myself reading paragraphs over and over again to soak in all the richness of the words as they help me grasp a new understanding of who God is. Much of the book is about how one can “know” God (hence the title), but the author made these few points about how much God knows us:

“What matters supremely, therefore, is not, in the last analysis, the fact that I know God, but the larger fact which underlies it – the fact that he knows me. I am graven on the palms of his hands. I am never out of his mind. All my knowledge of him depends on his sustained initiative in knowing me. I know him because he first knew me, and continues to know me. He knows me as a friend, one who loves me; and there is no moment when his eye is off me, or his attention distracted from me, and no moment, therefore when his care falters.

This is momentous knowledge. There is unspeakable comfort – the sort of comfort that energizes, be it said, not enervates – in knowing that God is constantly taking knowledge of me in love and watching over me for my good. There is tremendous relief in knowing that his love to me is utterly realistic, based at every point on prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery now can disillusion him about me, in the way I am so often disillusioned about myself, and quench his determination to bless me.”

Did you catch all that?

Read it again. Take a deep breath. Let it soak in.

I just don’t know what captivates me the most. Maybe it is the fact I am never out of his mind.

Maybe it is the fact nothing I will ever do will “disillusion him about me” because he knows not only all my past failures but even the worst about me yet to happen...the terrible stuff I don’t even yet know.

Maybe it is simply he knows me as a friend and the God and Creator of this ever expanding universe...loves me.

Wow.

Bella

2009-01-06T09:33:00.000-08:00

For the past couple weeks, I’ve been going through some pretty unclear circumstances that seem to be changing daily. Some good, some confusing, some bad. As such, it’s been tough for me to come up with some super-encouraging, awe-inspiring blog topic for this week.

Yes, the Immersion bloggers are human too. You know our big secret.

So, that said, I’m feeling the itch to follow Woman-of-Steele’s example and share my thoughts on a really encouraging movie I saw recently: Bella.

Before watching the movie, I was told that the director, Alejandro Gomez Monteverde, had a very specific motive in making the film. Being a Latino in America, he wanted to break the stereotype of Latinos in film. Commonly, they’re portrayed as lower-class citizens in poverty-stricken neighborhoods riddled with crime and “banditos.” In making Bella, he wanted to have the positive influence of the film be from Latinos, and have the person at the bottom of the barrel be who we commonly see as the heroes in movies: Caucasians.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the story, a young, single girl by the name of Nina is fired from her waitressing job after showing up late too many times in a row due to an unplanned pregnancy. The restaurant she was fired from was own by a very well-to-do Latino man named Manny, and the lead chef was his brother José. After Manny fires Nina, José walks out on his job and his brother to take care of Nina.

The movie follows the two of them as Nina struggles with the thought of having an abortion, finding a new job, and just generally getting her life in order. Through it all, José is there by her side. He even takes her to stay with his family who welcomes her with open arms. They give her a place to rest and a meal bigger than any she’s had in months.

Nina is simply blown away by their kindness. In one of the most powerful scenes, she tells José how lucky he is to have a family that loves him so much. It was in that moment that Monteverde accomplished turning the Latino stereotype on its head.

I won’t spoil the end, but I think there’s a bigger theme here. I don’t believe the movie won the plethora of awards that it did simply because it challenged racial stereotypes, although that certainly earns it a firm pat on the back for that fact alone. There’s a very simple, heart-warming quality about José that all of us long to be for another person, and long to feel when we’re in need.

It shows the power of love.

José ditches a great job, turns his back on his money-hungry brother, and puts all his priorities aside because he recognizes that Nina’s needs are far greater than his own. He shows her that even though she’s made countless mistakes and has been cast aside by everyone else in her life, he still sees her as a girl worthy of being loved and cared for, and he does just that.

If you haven’t taken time out to watch this film, I highly recommend you do so. It’s will challenge you boldly to think about your own priorities, the people in your life in need of your love, and what you’re doing [or not doing] about it.

Responsibility

2009-01-03T12:32:00.000-08:00

Some friends and I went to the movie Seven Pounds last night. This movie is so spiritual (but honestly, what isn't?). So as to not give anything away if you haven't seen it, I'll try to be general. In one part, Will Smith gives a really big gift to a woman and her children. He chose her because of her circumstances and this would now allow her to get away from her abusive boyfriend. In the letter he had written to her explaining things, he says something like "When you feel like asking 'why me?', don't". She is instructed to start a new life, starting with this gift she's been given.

I can't tell you the number of times God has said this same thing to me lately. When I look at the huge gifts and blessings God has given me, I can be in awe of it, but I'm no longer going to try and figure out how or why He did it. I do know it's because He loves me THAT MUCH. But ultimately it's what I do with it that matters. Am I going to start a new life or continue to repeat past mistakes that took me away from God? For me, the answer is easy.

This gift of grace and mercy - it makes me responsible. I am responsible for showing others the love that God has shown me. I am responsible for taking lessons learned and share my story with others so that I am a model for how a relationship with Christ changes a person. I am excited for all the different ways He will have me do this in the coming year. I know as a Christian, it's what I'm supposed to do. It is what I want to do.

My prayer for all of us this new year is that we will feel a deeper responsibility and desire to act because of what God has done for us personally. I pray that you too have felt the power of God's love and grace and that it inspires you to reach out to the world in any way you can.

Happy New Year!

To be filled with wonder...

2008-12-31T09:34:00.000-08:00

Today is the final day of 2008. As I reflect on the past year, it was certainly filled great highs and great lows. I experienced times of great happiness with many blessings and other times of great sadness with difficult trials.

I would say it was in the lows where I grew the most in my faith and trust in God. It was in the challenging trials where I found myself drawing closer to God to rely on His strength. He was always there for me; He was faithful as promised.

When the going was good, God was still just as close, but it was easy to drift my own direction relying on my own strength. I still have much to learn, but God did teach me a great deal about love, trust, patience, and forgiveness. I could go on and on about how much I have learned, but we all know I still have a lifetime of learning still ahead of me.

It is good to look back on 2008, but I look forward to 2009.

As we begin 2009, my prayer for myself and for all of you is that we would have a greater sense of wonder at the majesty of our Savior and King, our Lord Jesus Christ. My desire in the coming days is to learn more about who God is, what He is like, what are His characteristics, and how He reveals himself.

I desire to be filled with wonder. I desire this for all of us.

Wonder used as a verb can mean “to think curiously or be curious about” and “to be filled with admiration, amazement, or awe; to marvel.”

What would it be like to wake up each day in the months ahead truly curious about God or to wake up filled with awe at who He is? What does it mean to admire God and marvel at who He is? How would our lives look if we were filled with wonder? Would our lives be different?

May we all be filled with wonder...

Queridas Gemelas

2008-12-30T06:11:00.000-08:00

A couple years ago I headed to a district of Mexico City called Coyoacan for a week-long mission trip with six other young adults. The director of the missionary program, Jonathan, was in the early stages of planting a church which would later be called La Fuente (“the fountain” or “source”). It was a short trip, but very powerful. We made a lot of friends and got them plugged in to the ministry that Jonathan was leading.

As our trip ended, Jonathan invited two of the girls from our team to be interns in the heart of Mexico City for 10 months! Needless to say, after many long weeks of prayer and careful consideration, they both accepted the offer. For the sake of simplicity, we’ll call these girls “Heather” and “Abi,” even though those are, in fact, their actual names. :)

Prior to our initial trip, I had been very close friends with Heather for many years and knew her very well. I hadn’t met Abi before our trip, but it didn’t take long for her and I to get to know one another on a semi-personal level.

What I, as well as the girls themselves, found pretty interesting was that they were fairly opposite one another when it came to their personalities. I had always known Heather to be very easy-going, laid-back, and low-stress in all walks of life. She was the one that would show up five minutes late to every class we had in college, and could never fail to find a reason to smile even in the bleakest of circumstances.

Abi, on the other hand, would tell you that she was a classic example of a Type-A planner and organizer. She stuck to a schedule, was punctual about it, and liked to know what was going on, what was around her, and how everything was going to pan out.

It goes without saying that I anticipated quite a bit of personal conflict between Heather and Abi with them being so different from one another and being chosen to embark on such a lengthy voyage together. During their internships, Heather and Abi would be heavily and frequently involved in ministry outreach programs such as Alpha, English courses, and small groups. On top of that, they would be roommates for the duration of their time as missionaries. Not a day would go by when they wouldn’t have to spend a significant amount of time together.

But, I was completely taken aback by something I’ve been seeing over and over since they got back to the US from their 10-month internships in late November.

It was subtle at first. Over a conversation with Abi, I would hear her agree with something I’d say with an extended “Uh huuuuuh!” which was something I had always known Heather to do. Likewise, I had noticed Heather using several verbal mannerisms that I always remembered Abi using, such as sarcastically referring to risqué humor as “classy.”

But that was just the tip of the iceberg that sunk my Titanic of an incorrect assumption. Over many conversations with the girls, more and more significant examples of their seemingly inverted personalities emerged. Heather recounted stories to me of being frustrated because she had no plan, no knowledge of what was to come, which was totally unlike the Heather I had known for years. And Abi, on the other hand, spent a long conversation explaining to me about how she had come to let so many details that she used to sweat vigorously pass by her without so much as a glance anymore.

It was as if, because they were around each other so frequently for so long, they had started to become each other.

At first I just found this whole thing a point of humor, but it occurred to me the other day that what happened with Heather and Abi is a beautiful representation of what happens as we let Christ into our lives.

When Christ finds most of us, or rather, when we’re at the end of our rope and finally turn to him for help, he is completely foreign to us. We’re so unlike Christ in every way. But as we spend time with him every day, as we read his words and see the great example of how to live set before us in the scriptures, and pray to him from the bottom of our broken hearts, we start to become more like him and less like the self we became when we were trying to live life on our own.

Whether it’s when you wake up, during your lunch break, or before you go to bed at night, make time for Christ every day. Take time to hear FROM him, as well as talking TO him. Christ calls us to a relationship, and like any relationship, it requires full disclosure, emotional intimacy, and frequency. And, with your willing heart, Christ will make you more like him.

O Holy Night

2008-12-25T10:13:00.000-08:00

I had a most incredible time at Hope last night.

Last Christmas eve I went to service alone, my kids being scattered to their respected husband's or boyfriends' family homes. I went there feeling sorry for myself. Church during the holidays when families are all together can be a difficult place to be as a single. God answered the prayer I prayed as I drove in that night, that I would find someone to sit with. I did. I ran into someone in my Alpha group who invited me to sit with him and his girlfriend (who is now his wife, whose wedding, in fact, I stood up at this past Thanksgiving) and who later after the service asked me if I'd be interested in renting his loft. That started a whole new and exciting and amazing chapter in my life- living downtown and living alone. I must say this about my life sans-divorce. I find myself in places and situations and with people I never dreamed or imagined possible. It has been a grand adventure with Jesus.

So last night, not wanting to repeat last year's Christmas eve being alone struggle, I went to church for a completely different reason. I went to church to serve. I have found that it is much easier to stop myself before I go down the road of self-pity then it is to get out of it once I have begun to indulge that sin. I am finding that sometimes I have to be strategic and wise and make plans to not put myself in the path of temptation by finding an alternative- by doing something different to seek a new solution to an old challenge.

I remembered how much I used to be blessed when people showed up out of the blue and offered to serve in children's ministry when I was on staff at Hope. To have an unexpected extra set of hands was like manna from heaven. The same thing at Immersion. To have someone walk up and ask if they are needed to serve communion when they aren't scheduled is a gift (by the way, the answer to that is almost always “yes”). If there is one thing you can count on- you can count on the fact that Hope and Immersion always need volunteers. Always.

So I made plans with a few single friends and we went to church to serve. We greeted, passed out bulletins, lit candles, collected offering, gathered up candles from the bridge and the gym, passed out lights, refilled the boxes of lights and pretty much did whatever was needed.

We had a fabulous time. FABULOUS! Being immersed in Christmas music, being surrounded by hundreds and hundreds of people who were there to celebrate the birth of our Lord, being able to greet and shake hands and hug and say “Merry Christmas” and meet new people and reconnect with others was a blast. No joke. It was really and truly and amazingly enjoyable. Melissa Chrystal and I just beamed with the joy of it. We left tired but fulfilled.

I know I have said this before at and about Immersion but going to church to serve is a completely different experience from going to church to receive. Not that going to receive is bad- that's what church is there for. But when you go to serve you become a part of this grand and large thing that God is doing and you become connected with this staff/volunteer team and share the camaraderie and fellowship of a shared mission that you don't experience or even see when you come to receive. You know that the small part you are contributing is necessary and you don't feel alone.

The last thing that Jesus did in the upper room after sharing communion and before His arrest in the garden was to wash His disciples' feet. “For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you … If you know these things, happy are you if you do them.” (John 13:15,17) What made me truly happy last evening, was looking single women in the eye and welcoming them as they arrived, letting them know in my own small way that they were loved and wanted and not alone. That was a gift for me straight from heaven; a gift that made my heart truly happy and transformed Christmas eve into a holy night.

Put Your Heart Where Your Mouth Is

2008-12-22T07:33:00.000-08:00

If you’ve been around a church community for any length of time, you have probably learned to just expect certain things around the Christmas season. Dozens of shiny decorations adorning anything and everything, a special Christmas production put on by the church staff and ministry volunteers, and that one guy who thinks that wearing a Santa hat to church is both witty and stylish, whom no one has the heart to confront.

Most of these things we just take with a grain of salt and shrug off. That’s just Christmas, right? Sure is! But along the lines of those things we often witness and dismiss as Christmas behaviors, there is one thing that has never really sat right with me.

Each year, you’ll more than likely have to sit through several different sermons about remembering what Christmas is really about. Inevitably we will hear pastors talk to us about the story of the birth of Jesus, how humble his beginning [and entire life] was, and how we spend way too much money on Christmas presents. They encourage us to truly remember Jesus on Christmas day and to be his light to our families and those in need.

Now, I don’t mean to berate or insult the pastors who preach these sermons. In fact, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that they have only the best intentions and truly wish to enhance the spiritual richness of those who hear their sermons. But, I can’t help but notice that my Christmases never really change.

Even after hearing all those sermons, I still go home to my parents’ places. I still buy gifts that I’ve put basically no thought into. I still receive way more than I give. I still eat enough food to feed a homeless family. I still do nothing but think about myself...

But this year, I decided to do something different. I decided to look past the layers of tradition, swarms of rabid shoppers, and millions of sugarey treats. I decided to even look past the Christmas story itself to try to get a bigger picture, and ask the question, “What was God up to?”

No less than changing the world, of course!

God sent Jesus into our world to give us a chance to redeem ourselves of our sins and experience his infinite love. He reached out in a way that changed the dynamic of every relationship that every person on Earth had with him. What God did that day forever changed how we as people would approach him.

It seems to me that if we really want to strip away the seemingly insignificant parts of Christmas and honestly make great examples of our faith to honor our father this season, we’d be wise to start with his example.

What are some ways you can change your life drastically? What are some ways you can permanently enhance the lives of those around you?

Is there a family member you have been fueding with for years? Maybe this Christmas would be a good time to extend a peace offering.
Has God been tugging at your heart to start a ministry to help those in need, but you’ve just not gotten up the faith or motivation to do it? Now is the time.
Have you been rationalizing a selfish behavior that has been preventing a brother or sister from getting too close to you? Perhaps a good gift would be your undivided attention.

Needless to say, the examples could go on forever. But the more I’ve searched for God’s heart this Christmas, the more it has seemed to me that truly life-changing New Year’s resolutions are infinitely closer to the steps we should be taking than anything we actually do to celebrate the birth of our savior.

What We Can Learn from Mary & Joseph

2008-12-21T21:12:00.000-08:00

Every year as we hear the Christmas story, we are reminded of the faith of Mary and Joseph. Mary, the unwed, pregnant woman engaged to be married to Joseph, a poor man who knew this baby was not his. Put yourself in that scenario...how would you have responded if you were either Mary or Joseph? They are nothing short of an amazing demonstration of obedience to God.

Think about the events leading up to Jesus’ birth. Luke 2:4-5 says: And because Joseph was a descendent of King David, he had to go to Bethlehem in Judea, David’s ancient home. He traveled there from the village of Nazereth in Galilee. He took with him Mary, his fiancé, who was now obviously pregnant.

The notes in my bible say this in reference to the passage above:
Sometimes we think to ourselves, “I’m being obedient, so why aren’t things going better?” We face discomfort or inconvenience and immediately think either that we have misread God’s will or that God has made a mistake. But watch this quiet couple as they head toward Bethlehem. God did not soften Joseph’s bumpy road, but strengthened him. God did not provide a luxurious inn for Joseph and Mary, but brought his Son in to the world in humble surroundings. When we do God’s will, we are not guaranteed comfort and convenience. But we are promised that everything, even discomfort and inconvenience, has meaning in God’s plan.

If I were Mary, I'm not sure I would've been faithful given the circumstances. Luckily, God didn't choose me to give birth to the Messiah. But even today we can relate to their story. Reflect back on the past year of your life. Think about the times you felt doubtful or inconvenienced. The times you stepped out of your comfort zone and did what you knew God was asking, and the times you didn‘t.

If you are like me, your year may have felt like a roller coaster - a lot of amazing experiences but also a lot of doubt and uncertainty about where God is taking you. I find that it was the times I stepped out and took a risk - whether it was becoming more involved in a ministry, meeting new people, putting myself in places I never thought I'd be - the experiences that were no longer about me being comfortable but were faithful to God - those were the most rewarding.

Immersion CHRISTMAS HOPE BOX Update

2008-12-18T19:57:00.000-08:00

Hello Everybody Well, for those of you brave enough to trek out to Immersion tonight - THANK YOU. Hopefully you got your fill of Christmas cookies and paper boxes!

If you weren't able to join us tonight and you bought items for the Christmas Hope box, you can still drop them off! We'll be accepting items on Monday, December 22nd at Lutheran Church of Hope. Just bring them by the church and drop them off at the office and we will put them in boxes and take them to the right place! If you're wondering what you can still bring, or just feel like bringing more stuff, here's a list:

Christmas Hope Box gift list:

· New bath towel and wash cloth

· Large can of beef stew · Bible

· Body Wash

· Large can of chicken chunky noodle soup

· Box of Saltine Crackers

· Tooth paste

· 4 pack of toilet paper

· Two cans of green beans

· Can opener

· Laundry detergent (please place in plastic sack to prevent spills)

· Two large cans tuna or chicken

Hope you're all well. Stay safe and warm! See you on Monday if you have gift items to bring. Don't forget, no Immersion on Christmas Day - Merry Christmas!

Peace.

Justin

Immersion is ON.

2008-12-18T12:12:00.001-08:00

Immersion is ON tonight!

We'll be rescheduling Kingdom Praise for a later date.

Gift-packing in the Bridge is on as planned! Come as you're able. Stay safe!

Justin

No Pocket in a Shroud

2008-12-18T04:12:00.000-08:00

In Maine they can spot a visitor from a hundred paces and love, with their sarcastic wit, straight face and dry sense of humor, to spoof on them. Especially lost ones. Stop and ask for directions and its likely you'll hear (in a slow drawl) “You caaan't get they-ya from he-ya.” Press the case and you'll be told, “Ayuh … down the rud a piece.” Which could be anywhere from around the bend to miles away. Even in their speech they are austere.

I love Maine. Everything about it. The people, the accent, the land, the dense forests, the rocky coast, the weather-beaten houses, the lobster pots and rough-hewn boats. If you ever have a chance to visit, go- it is unlike any other state and truly in some ways you feel you're in another country.

Maine is not a wealthy state but it is a state of very hearty people who are hard-working, tough-loving and frugal-living and who don't take or make excuses, whine or feel sorry for themselves or pander to others. They are strongly opinionated, fiercely independent, love arguing for arguments sake, aren't impressed by much and are good to their core. They do what ought to be done and are not driven by the need to amass things. True Yankees. In fact, people in Maine pride themselves on their frugality. Nothing goes to waste. Nothing. They can teach the rest of us a thing or two about surviving tough economic times.

There is a saying there that sums up the man and speaks to the fabric of his being: Use it up, Wear it out, Make it do or Do without. Don't believe me? Check this out. Little slivers of bath soap are saved and used in a metal net-like contraption to wash dishes. I kid you not. You swish it around in the sink until the water gets soapy. Windows are cleaned with vinegar water and newspaper (yes it works- try it). Clothes are patched and patched again and there is no shame in it. Even today. Of course I am not talking about city transplants but the real Maine-iacs, the stoics, born and bred there for generations. The ones who can point out 5 generations preceding them in the small town cemetery they keep up with pride.

Cod fish is dried by hanging it outside on two lines designed to continually spin to keep the flies off. It hangs and spins for days until the consistency of leather (and yes, flies land on it and it is served anyway.) When you eat lobster in Maine, every bit is devoured including the meat (if you can call it that) in the antennae. Yes it is unapologetically and publicly sucked out. Nothing goes to waste. Nothing.

Ever look at an L.L. Bean catalog? It never changes. Every year it sells the same wicked good socks and wicked good slippers and wicked good slickers. But develop a hole in those socks no matter how long you wear them or how old they are and they'll be replaced for free. I don't think its ever occurred to them to change the style. It works, they like it, why mess with it? Plus, how can you get a free pair 10 years later if they change the style?

About our materialism and our inability to use it up, wear it out, make do, do with less or do without, they'd probably say we're “soft as custard” and we “don't know more than a goose knows God”. I don't think they'd say it in judgment as much as a statement of fact, cut and dry, no offense intended. After all, “there's no pocket in a shroud,” they'd say. And what can we said to that but, “Ayuh,”? There is no pocket in a shroud so we can take it with us when we die.

"Only One Thing Worth Being Concerned About" this Christmas

2008-12-17T10:42:00.000-08:00

Wow, the Christmas season seems to get busier and busier every year.

I took a few minutes to watch A Charlie Brown Christmas last night. Even back in 1965 when the show made its debut, a reminder was needed that the meaning of Christmas is not metal trees, light contests, or pageants. When all hope of a wonderful Christmas seems to be lost, Linus steps up to the stage and quotes the Christmas story from Luke 2:8-14. After quoting the verses, Linus kindly reminds Charlie that Christ is the true reason for Christmas.

How much more do we need to be reminded of that this year?

This weekend I read this story from Luke 10.

38 As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. 39 Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. 40 But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.” 41 But the Lord said to her, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! 42 There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”

The story reminded me not to worry and be anxious over details but to focus on Christ and His love...especially in this holiday season.

Ask yourself…am I busy with all the details of the season or am I focused on Christ? Am I full of love, joy, and peace or am I full of worry, stress, and anxiety.

Don’t be like Martha. Don’t be distracted from the real meaning of Christmas. It is so easy for us to get distracted.

My prayer this season for each one of us (myself included!!) is that we would not be distracted with all the details of the season. I pray our hearts would be full of love, joy, and peace rather than worry, stress, and anxiety.

I will likely be on vacation next Wednesday so have a wonderful Christmas everyone!!!

Dead Hard-Drives Make Great Spiritual Opportunities

2008-12-16T08:15:00.000-08:00

Do you ever have those days when you get the distinct impression God is messing with you, and your spiritual ears perk up to see his hand at work? One of those days when things are far from normal from the get-go, and you can't help but think there's going to be some bigger reason for it? For instance, when you leave your house to find a flat tire on your car, or when you wake up to find out your water was turned off when you need a shower, or when you come in to work to find the hard drive in your brand new laptop fried like a curious toddler with a metal fork?

The first two were examples; the third actually happened to me yesterday...

Technical details aside, my brand new work laptop had a dud hard-drive in it, and I was without a computer all day yesterday. We made several jokes about IBM standing for Inevitably Broken Machine, but that's neither here nor there. The important thing to know is that all the "work" I do is done via email, Microsoft Word, or a web-authoring program called RoboHelp. Without a computer, I'm unable to do anything productive.

I swear I just heard a construction crew member somewhere cursing my name...

So, after the tech told me that it would take until at least noon on the following day to get my computer back, I decided to pick up a book called The Energy Bus. Our boss had gotten us all copies of it and asked us to read it in our free time, stating that it was something we could all stand to hear. I figured there couldn't possibly be a better time than this to read it seeing as twiddling my thumbs and texting can only occupy so much of my time at my now primitive workstation.

Curiously enough, the book is about a guy named George who lets poor circumstances like flat tires and big workloads ruin his life. He's always angry because he feels as though he has no control over his life, and he ends up meeting a bus driver named Joy who helps him see his life in a new light [what a cleverly-veiled innuendo for a name, right?] She shows him how these seemingly bad circumstances can be God's way of nudging us to a place where we meet someone we need in our lives, or learn a lesson that we desperately need to learn.

So of course, as I'm reading this, I'm becoming increasingly aware of the fact that God is, in fact, planning to mess with me seeing as he's hacked me off at the knees to do any sort of work and has left me with no other choice but to pass the time by reading a book about the very thing he's doing with me. Bring it on, I said, bring it on!

I continue reading more about this Mr. Rogers-esque bus driver named Joy and how she explains to Georgey-boy that once he is able to see his self-perceived "problems" as part of a bigger story, it's much more likely to be excited, enthusiastic, and energized about what's happening with life. On and on she goes about how people are magnetically attracted to people who are excited, enthusiastic, and energized about what they do, even if they're not leaders. Which I hadn't really realized before, but I found it to be quite true when I really got to thinking about it. Some of the people I admire and look up to the most are those who have a clear vision about their lives and are absolutely passionate about what they do. The positive energy that they emit from being so in-the-zone about what they do hooks any and all observers, even if they're not the slightest bit interested in the subject matter.

For example, while I have virtually no interest in sports, I still find myself baffled when I see the dedication and intensity on the faces of Olympic athletes who have dedicated their entire lives to their passions. This same principle can no doubt hold true for a political candidate. The voters may not be interested in every topic he addresses, but the excitement, enthusiasm, and energy that he conveys as he speaks to the masses will sway the hearts of the voters. There's something about those attributes that inspire us to believe in a person's potential as a leader. The old saying about being able to sell ice to an Eskimo is probably a direct result of people who’ve harnessed their potential like this.

This got me thinking about my own passions. About when I have felt the most excited about an opportunity, enthusiastic to do my best, and energized to commit my time to something. As I thought about it, I was surprised when my honest answer wasn't leading worship – It was teaching English.

Over the summer I visited a very good group of friends in Mexico City, and had the opportunity to sit in on an English course down there. I got to help people native to Mexico understand what words meant in English, how to say them properly, and good ways to remember them. It came so naturally to me that it felt like breathing. I loved every minute of it and would do it for free for the rest of my life.

As I flipped the last page of that shiny yellow book over and clapped it shut, everything came into focus like God was carefully dialing in the lens on my camera.

Several weeks ago, my boss had asked me about an ESL (English as a Second Language) opportunity at her church that met on Monday nights. She knew I was well-versed in Spanish and that I would be a great asset to their program. I unfortunately declined because Monday nights were the nights when we had Immersion worship team rehearsals.

But wait, there’s more!

Over the past few weeks, the Immersion worship team and I have been discussing ways we can streamline our band selection and rehearsal processes a bit. After a lot of brainstorming and praying, we decided that for the 2009 year, we were going to forego having practices on Monday nights at all.

Now, to bring it all together...

So in a matter of hours, God completely destroys the hard-drive in my laptop; forces me to read a book about excitement, enthusiasm, and energy in your life; unveils the passion in my own life that invokes those qualities in me; and tops it all off by showing me that he had planned for me to have Monday evenings free to explore this opportunity in teaching at my boss's church for weeks now.

What a show-off!

But in all seriousness, I love the ways that God orchestrates all of the seemingly mundane details in your life to set you up in perfect position to walk through the next door he has opened for you. Keep your eyes peeled and your ears sharp – he could be after you next! :)

Paddle

2008-12-12T13:44:00.000-08:00

I knew the economy was bad.
I knew it was all over the news.
I knew it was affecting a lot of people.

But I didn’t personally KNOW anyone who had been let go…

...until last week.

And what a time to lose your job, I mean I can’t imagine the heartache going on in some family's lives at this time.

So I am aware more than I was.

Aware that people need help, and I need to be thankful for all that I have.

People (I myself included) are getting the sense that they are no longer in control.

They can’t control the economy.
They can’t control their job.
They can’t control their future.

It’s a scary thing to realize – especially if you thought you were in control (which we all know ultimately no one is in control except for God).

But I am also a believer that this doesn’t mean you should just sit back and let life happen, have the pieces fall as they may, so to speak.

There needs to be a balance and perspective.

You can’t control the current but you can paddle the boat.

So I pray that we as a country and also as a body of Christ learn from the past, learn from the present and paddle our boat accordingly. I pray for the lives that have been negatively affected and that the church pulls through in a big way and people see God working.

I pray that God would give me eyes to see what is important in life.

I pray for the release of fear.

I pray for hope.

Cartoon Angels Pwn

2008-12-11T07:34:00.000-08:00

Have you ever prayed a prayer for God to challenge you in an area of your life you felt you were failing in? Afterwards, when God delivers on your prayer, and you’ve been shaken way out of your comfort zone, have you ever wished you hadn’t prayed so well for it? Metaphorically, I often ask God to “slap me around a little”, but I usually end up feeling like I got my jaw busted in response.

I joke, of course, but I love when this happens. Many times I pray for God to help me see where my misunderstandings and irrational beliefs are so that, by his grace, I can change my heart and believe what is right, and what is true. It’s a beautiful thing when your life changes accordingly. What I love most is that God’s laws aren’t irrelevant, arbitrary whims through which he exercises his power. In fact, quite the opposite is true – there are a million great reasons for every law God lays down so clearly for us through scripture, and he’ll gladly show you the reasons if you ask!

God did just that recently for me.

A particular challenge for me is my relationship with my boss. As people, she and I have no qualms with one another. She’s a Christian as well, and one of the most caring individuals I’ve ever met. But when it comes to work styles, we see things VERY differently.

Just by nature, our personalities conflict a lot. My boss is a very detailed, over-involved person who likes to get her nose in any and every task possible. Many of her direct reports refer to her as a “micro-manager” in that she doesn’t just tell you to do things; she tells you how she wants it done as well.

I, on the other hand, am the complete opposite. I couldn’t care less how people get things done as long as the big picture is filled in. For instance, I see 5+5, 2x5, 20/2, and 15-5 all as perfectly rational ways to get to 10. But if my boss asks me to get to 10, she’ll tell me which mathematical strategy to use.

For someone who is more of an overview thinker, this can be frustrating. I feel like my creativity and freedom are very stifled, almost as if I’m being treated like a child rather than an adult with a full-time job. So, my natural inclination is to ask “Why this way?” This, of course, puts unnecessary pressure on my boss. She doesn’t have to explain herself to me, and she doesn’t owe me any explanation. It’s my job to listen to her, but when I don’t understand her reasoning, a simple command isn’t good enough. So, my natural “adult” reaction is to color outside the lines and show her that even if I do things MY way, we’ll still get the same result...

Yes, clearly this is a wise behavior.

In case you’re bad at detecting sarcasm, I’m using it right now. A lot.

God’s been challenging me a lot in this rebellious attitude I have with micro-managers. So, without even so much as a half-hearted prayer for help, God opened my eyes to what was really going on with my attitude. This may seem somewhat comical, but I often have mental conversations with myself, as if I have a little cherub on one shoulder, and a demon on the other. For some reason, the cherub has the voice of Towelie from South Park. I have no idea why.

I think the conversation went something like this…

Cherub: You should have changed your voicemail like your boss asked you to.
Demon: Why? It’s not like it matters. People still know I’m not answering my phone.
Cherub: Maybe, but why did you refuse your boss’s orders? What are you trying to prove?
Demon: Uh, that things don’t have to be done EXACTLY as she asks as long as they get done. I didn’t see any problem come from it!
Cherub: The problem is that you’re not the one in charge. Your boss gave you a task to do, and you should do it without any undue questions or fussing.
Demon: But her way doesn’t make any sense! It’s so much simpler my way!
Cherub: That may be, but does that give you the right to question every order she gives you? Should she have to explain herself every time she talks to you in order to get you to simply obey her?
Demon: Well, no… I guess not…
Cherub: Exactly! When you demand an explanation from her every time she gives you an order, you’re trying to make HER answer to YOU! SHE’S the boss here – not you! Get over yourself!
Demon: [walks away with tail between legs, grumbling about sissy little wings]

There, you got a glimpse inside my head. If you never want to come back, I understand.

Anyway, that’s just one of many awesome things about God. In praying through a tough situation with my boss, God showed me a very good answer to “Why are we called to obey all authority?” Cartoony special effects aside, I think if you honestly let God ask you some really tough questions, and don’t let your little demon get the last word, you’ll be amazed at what has been right under your nose for years.

Nature...no excuses

2008-12-10T14:08:00.000-08:00

My post today will be short, simple and hopefully sweet.

I love nature. I love hiking in the mountains or watching a sunset. I love the smell of the fresh air after a spring rain. I could go on and on...

Last week we had our first snowfall of the winter. It was one of those where it was still fairly warm outside (in the low 30s as compared to single digits with a wind chill) and the snowflakes where the big puffy kind. The whiteness blanketed the trees, the ground, the streets, the cars and the houses. A snowfall like this has its peacefulness and quietness about it. Everything is covered in white and the stillness is breathtaking. These snowfalls always remind me of Psalm 51:7.

“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.”

Nature is always pointing to its Creator. A snowfall is such a beautiful picture of what God wants to do within our hearts & souls. God wants to cover up the dirty, the rusty, the muddy, the dark, and the ugly with a blanket of white. He wants to make all things new in our lives...if we are willing to let Him.

I have just started studying the book of Romans (much more to come on this I’m sure) and I the following verse captivated me.

Romans 1:20, “For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing God.”

My study Bible offered these comments for the verse, “Nature shows a God of might, intelligence, and intricate detail; a God of order and beauty; a God who controls powerful forces.”

So the next time you step outside...even if it is just to scrape snow and ice of your car...take time to look around at the beautiful creation all around you and thank God for His amazing qualities we see in and through nature.

Gifts

2008-12-08T18:10:00.000-08:00

Can you remember some of your favorite Christmas gifts you’ve received? I’ve been thinking about some of mine when I was growing up. When I was really young, it was my Cabbage Patch Kids. One year I got a real cash register. As I got older I would receive more useful or practical gifts…a bike, a new tennis racket, clothes. For the most part, whatever was on my Christmas list, I likely received it.

Then there are the things, both big and small, that I’ve asked God for. Often times it was hard for me to see where God was in all of it. But now that I‘m so far removed from certain situations, I can see how the times I didn’t get what I wanted was because of what it would've done to me. Most of the time, the things I would ask God for were only a temporary fix to a deep-seated problem. And He wanted to get to the root of the problem.

So instead He gave me His incredible mercy…a gift so big I cannot even begin to wrap my mind around it or accurately describe what it’s done for my life. Forgiveness. Self-control. Just to name a few. Unlike so many things we get that may quickly loose their luster, a relationship with Jesus means these things will never go away.

God says that He withholds no good thing from us. And so we can be sure that whatever he does or does not give us is for our own good. I still can't believe how much simpler and peaceful my life got when I understood this to be true.

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. James 1:17

Reminiscing

2008-12-05T10:52:00.000-08:00

Reminiscing – how cool is it when you can reminisce with someone….

You know those really good friends?

Those great friends you may have from childhood or high school or even college that know stories. Good stories, bad stories…indifferent.

Those are the friends I am talking about.

I LOVE seeing old friends that know a chapter of my life, that can reminisce and laugh about silly things that have happened, adventures once taken, or events that took place.

Memories are a bond that link you together for life… if you let them.

I run into these friends when I go back to my hometown, a friend has a wedding or maybe a "chance" encounter in a new town (Philip that means you).

And of course there is the infamous Facebook… I have heard more people say that the reason they love Facebook so much is because they get to see what old friends are up to and keep in touch after YEARS of no communication.

I love it too!!!

The whole thing that got me started on this idea was that I made it back home recently and got to see some close friends from years past.

And yes, we’ve changed.
And yes, we live different lives.
And yes, many events have occurred between then and now.

But we were able to reminisce… and laugh… and remember.

I LOVED IT!!!

And it got me to thinking…. God know everything about me. He knows everything about my past, all the stories, the adventures and the events. So we started reminiscing….

“Hey God remember when you provided in a BIG way for me….. remember when I thought I was lost and never going to have it figured out and then you showed me…. remember when you spoke to me through that beautiful starry night and showed me how much you loved me and cared for me….. remember??”

Of course you do! You’re GOD!! ☺ HAHA

It’s me who needs to take the time to remember how He’s always been there, how He loves more than I can comprehend, and how I know who I am because of Him.☺

Here To Stay

2008-12-04T04:28:00.000-08:00

I am going to out myself (as if you haven’t already surmised this from past blogs). I am not a young adult. I am a poser- an old adult hanging around people 25 years younger than me, thoroughly enjoying it and sometimes wondering why. A plausible explanation is that I am immature and suffer from Peter Pan syndrome! Justin tells me I am more postmodern than some in their 20s (not sure if that’s a compliment or not). Regardless I have been around the block a few times and if that doesn’t give you wisdom it at least gives you experience. Experience I have.

Which is helpful. Experience, I mean, especially in times of stress or uncertainty … like now. It seems as if we are in a global economic crisis. Today’s bad news is followed by tomorrow’s worse news. Banks, businesses, individuals, automobile manufacturers want bailed out. 401Ks are down a third or more. Jobs are scarce, dollars few. Last week the non-profit I worked for sent around a letter saying that there will be no Christmas bonuses for employees this year, followed by a letter this week pleading for employees to donate money to the agency. Election elation seems to have been tempered by the reality of the state of the economy. There is serious tension everywhere.

Let me offer this word of advice that my father shared with me and that I hope will bring some measure of comfort. This too shall pass. Simple but profound and true: this too shall pass. In my numerous decades I have experienced busts and booms, repeatedly. I have seen prime interest rates as high as 21.5% and as low as 4%. I have seen homes sell so fast that there were lines in driveways of prospective buyers and I have sold a home, during tough economic times, at a $20,000 loss, thanking God I didn’t have to pay the bank to get out. My current home has been on the market for over 2 years. I lived through Jimmy Carter and double digit inflation in the 70’s, the Texas oil crisis in the 80s, the technology crash in New England in the early 90’s, the dot com rise and fall this century and most recently watched as the bottom fell out of the sub-prime mortgage industry. In between those were times of unprecedented prosperity.

I have watched good economic times come and go and I can say with a fair measure of certainty- they will continue to come and go. I am not trying to downplay the seriousness of the financial crisis by being a Pollyanna. Nor am I trying to be a Debby Downer suggesting we should eat, drink and be merry because tomorrow we may die. I’m just saying- wait and see if it doesn’t pass. And then come back again. Which is why it is so important to not attach your worth or self-esteem to your bank account or stock portfolio or material possessions or even your job. All those things you can lose in a day. Ask those who lived through the tornadoes and floods in Iowa this year. Ask anyone who has been around as long as me. You don’t traverse this world without experiencing loss and gain and loss and gain. And the older you get the more you realize- things don’t matter. People do.

It is important to be fiscally responsible, to live within your means and not take on debt if at all possible. It is equally important to guard your heart and not let the current state of the economy, whether it be good or bad, determine your happiness. Jesus says we are in this world but not of it and for that we should be of good cheer. We do not have to be slaves to today’s economic woes, worldly frets, doomsday predictions and dire news. We can live simply and joy in Him, thankful for His provisions today and trusting in His care for us tomorrow. Seriously that is not only doable it is the only way to live.

And that, my friends, is my 2 cents worth that you can take to the bank (do I hear a collective groan?)- a bit of experience and perspective (that is hopefully not completely devoid of wisdom) from this young/old adult who loves, loves, loves Jesus and loves, loves, loves Immersion. Be of good cheer. Jesus is here. To stay.

Previously on Heroes...

2008-12-03T12:14:00.000-08:00

I’ll come right out and say it: I’m a dork, and I’m not ashamed of it.

I love fantasy, and always have, all kinds of it. Video games, books, movies, you name it. As a kid, my dad and I bonded over hours of Galaga and dozens of other video games. My first R-rated movie was Terminator 2: Judgment Day. My pre-teen obsession was Goosebumps and Fear Street novels. And even now, I’ll confess to enjoying the occasional visit to the World of Warcraft.

I love the allegory of fantasy. It stimulates your mind in ways that most day-to-day interactions don’t. It draws us into a world that doesn’t exist, in order to teach us about the world that does. Even in the case of Firefly, where rogue independents fly from planet to planet fighting an intergalactic battle against a corrupt, oppressive government, the viewer finds himself easily identifying with the characters on the show through their interactions with other characters, the way they react to challenges, and their moral stances in times of crises.

Which brings me to my latest obsession: Heroes.

Heroes is set primarily in present-day. The basic premise of the show is that some individuals with unique genetic mutations express extraordinary, superhuman traits - what they call “abilities”. These abilities can be anything from rapid cellular regeneration to psychokinesis (moving objects with the mind). However, there’s one character in particular whose ability has really intrigued me, and even challenged me as a Christian.

Matt Parkman, a run-of-the-mill police officer, is telepathic.

In the beginning episodes of the show, Parkman’s ability manifests as him hearing the thoughts of people around him, similarly to the scene in Bruce Almighty where the prayers of everyone around him started popping into his head uncontrollably.

For example, during a murder investigation, Parkman hears the terrified thoughts of a little girl who the police had assumed was missing after her parents were brutally murdered. Because he heard her thoughts, he was able to find her hiding in the house and rescue her.

Parkman also uses his ability to hear his upset wife’s thoughts about him [something I’m sure a lot of men wish they could do once in a while]. Even though she is being stubborn and not communicating with him, he knows what is bothering her and takes steps to resolve the problem.

But this seemingly awesome ability has some downsides as well. Just as clearly as he hears the thoughts that he can use for good, he also hears the ruthless insults. The frustrated thoughts that people would never actually say, he hears with complete clarity. To make matters worse, he sometimes has trouble focusing when he is around a lot of people.

In an episode from the first season, there was a really powerful scene that spoke volumes to me about our nature as people…

After a romantic dinner with his wife, Parkman heads to a local convenience store to pick up some coffee-flavored ice cream. He grabs the half pint and heads to the counter to pay. As he is waiting in line, the thoughts of everyone are jumping in and out of his head. “I can’t remember what kind she wanted … Ugh, I’d have to work out if I ate this … These are so expensive!”

But in the midst of those random thoughts, he caught the malicious thoughts of a man intending to rob the store. Parkman glances around the store and sees a young man glaring angrily at the cashier, hands in the pockets of his denim jacket. “Just shoot him and run … the security cameras won’t see you … just do it!”

Being the upholder of public safety that he is, Parkman decides to intervene. He cautiously approaches the man in the denim jacket and has a hushed conversation about how he knows what the man is planning to do, and that he himself is a cop. Parkman convinces the man to leave his gun on the shelf behind him and go home to his girlfriend who is pregnant.

The man who intended to rob the store leaves the store, and Parkman breathes a sigh of relief. He then grabbed the gun that the man left on the shelf and proceeded to get rid of it. Just then, the thoughts of every other customer in the store hit him like a ton of bricks. “Oh my God, he’s got a gun! … Is he going to shoot me? … What is he doing!?”

Parkman puts his life on the line to save the cashier (and perhaps others in the store), and he ends up scaring everyone in the store into thinking that he is the criminal looking to rob the store.

Now, I’ll leave you to dwell on how that scene is a pretty good representation of how Jesus was treated by the Romans, the Pharisees, and even his own disciples. But, what really struck me about that whole scene is that after convincing the man not to rob the store, Parkman was ready to feel like a Hero. But, because of his ability, he got the real story. In a way, he got a glimpse of God’s perspective.

God sees straight through to our hearts. Despite what we say or do, God understands perfectly what we’re actually thinking.

When that annoying person at church comes to talk to you and you greet them with a “Hey, how’s it going?” God hears the, “Great, this guy again.”
As you drop change into a homeless person’s hands, God hears the self-inflating “You’re a good Christian!”
And even before you open your Bible to read, God hears the “Gosh, I’d really rather be doing something else right now.”

Those are only examples, but I think you see what I mean. Just because we don’t act on evil thoughts we have doesn’t mean we’re somehow justified. Those things that come into our minds came directly from our hearts. And if those thoughts are reflections of our hearts, then I think we have a pretty good reason to be thankful for grace.

In conclusion, I’ll leave you with a challenge. Think of a person who really tries your patience, someone who annoys you to no end, or even someone you have chosen to ignore entirely for whatever reason. The next time you see them, act as if they can hear what you’re thinking. See how it changes your behavior. See how it makes you feel.

I think you’ll end up thankful that we have a Hero to worship.

Love

2008-12-03T06:10:00.000-08:00

What is love?

Why does it feel so wonderful to be loved? Why does it feel even better to love someone?

Why is it that when one gives up on love, everything else seems to fade away as well – joy, hope, forgiveness, compassion. Are they all connected in some way?

Erwin McManus offers these thoughts in his book Soul Cravings:

"We cannot live unaffected by love. We are most alive when we find it, most devastated when we lose it, most empty when we give up on it, most inhumane when we betray it, and most passionate when we pursue it."

Again, what is love?

Let me say this...Hollywood does not have the answer.

1 John 4:16: God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.

God is love? What does that mean? I have heard that phrase thousands of times, but what does it mean? This past summer I had an epiphany about this which forever changed my perspective on love. It was not really anything super amazing, but I just remembered one basic principle from algebra. The word “is” in story problems often meant something equaled something else. The word “is” could be substituted by the equals sign. Like I said...nothing fancy.

So...

God = Love

Cool, right? Then I remembered things on either side of the equals sign could be rotated or flip flopped as long as they stayed unchanged on both sides. Huh?

Love = God

This is when it hit me. Love is God. Just soak in those words for a few minutes. Love is God. I’m going to say it again because it sends a tingle throughout my being with the very thought of it...love is God.

Why does it feel so wonderful to love or be loved? Love is the very presence of God. Love IS God. Isn’t that a mind boggling thought when you really stop to think about it? The very existence of love in every human circumstance, however great or small, is the presence of God.

My prayer for you today...may you experience the presence of God in your life...may you encounter love. God is love. Love is God.

Preparation

2008-11-30T17:04:00.000-08:00

Earlier this year I had decided that I was going to run the Chicago marathon. Not exactly a small feat for someone who'd never run more than 4 miles at a time. It ended up being eighteen weeks of training that completely changed my life. There's something to be said for the solitude that running provides, and I know that God has allowed it to be one of the many ways I get to experience His peace.

But the training wasn't all great. Of course in the heat of the summer, there were days when running was the last thing I wanted to do. There were days when I couldn't even go a mile without feeling like my legs were going to collapse under me. Days like this caused a lot of self-doubt and I would question if I could actually do this or not. As the weeks went by, I was getting more anxious and impatient and I just wanted the race to be here NOW, even though I knew I was not ready.

But how critical is the training to the race? Most people would not just say, "I'm going to run a marathon today!" and have it be a success. The weeks of training were the difficult part…the time management, maintaining my motivation, listening to what my body is telling me, allowing myself to rest. Although difficult many days, the training and preparation were essential…I would not have finished otherwise.

For a long time, I had the complete opposite attitude toward my spiritual life and my relationship with God. I used to wander through life with no real focus. I had always believed in God, and just thought that no matter what, He would always come through for me. And often times He did. But there was no real devotion on my part…I wasn’t willing to do the training, so to speak, that God was asking of me to get me where He wanted me. My heart wasn’t in it and the result was not good.

But now, I’m learning to treat my spiritual life as if I’m training for a marathon. Learning that it’s not enough to just be waiting for something big to happen in my life, but to be focused and preparing myself so that I‘m ready when God decides it‘s time. To be purposeful and intentional every day of my life. To follow the path He’s laying out for me and trust it’s taking me some where great, even when it feels like it’s taking forever. To run and not be weary…

Self Betrayal

2008-11-25T07:33:00.000-08:00

I’ve been reading a book called Leadership and Self Deception lately, and it’s really challenged me on the way that I see basically EVERYONE in my life. I’m only halfway through it at the moment, but the basic premise of the book is that through a series of interactions with other people, we develop beliefs about them, and consequently, about ourselves in relationship to that person. Furthermore, once we [perhaps, unknowingly] develop those beliefs, we bring those to the table every time we interact with that person, and we posture ourselves accordingly.

For instance, I may see my boss as a very legalistic, hard-edged person, which makes me react as more subservient than I would to my brother, who presents me with a totally different relationship dynamic. He obviously has no authoritative role over me, and is a very lax person, so I react much more casually and personally to him than I do to my boss.

This isn’t news to most people, nor is it a revolutionary way of thinking. But, what really caught me off guard is this cycle that the book illustrated that literally had me astounded and convicted to the point that my jaw was hanging open.

This is going to be a long ride, so stay with me…

The author began talking about self betrayal. He defined it as “an act contrary to what I feel I should do for another person.” For example, when we pass by a homeless person asking for change and we ignore the pull of the Holy Spirit to help them out, in this author’s vocabulary, we have betrayed ourselves.

To illustrate the author’s point in its fullness, let’s run with an example all-too familiar to each and every one of us: tipping wait staff.

Note: If you want to get anything out of reading this, approach it with an open mind. Don’t introduce your own details to the story to excuse a behavior or weasel your way out of applying this to yourself. Just run with me for a few minutes here, and I think we’ll both see something very powerful at work.

Imagine it’s Thursday night after Immersion, and you’re out with a group of friends at our dearly-beloved Buffalo Wild Wings for some socializing and spicy chicken. While you’re there, you are forced to wait longer than you’d like several times for your drink refills, your food took over 20 minutes to arrive at the table, and you were infrequently visited by your server after it was delivered. It was a busy night due to the large Immersion crowd, and your service was suffering. In addition to all this, when your server was at the table, she seemed very rushed and was struggling to keep up with all of the refills and miscellaneous requests from people at the table.

Finally, the bill comes, and you pick up the pen to fill in how much of a tip to leave. You’re faced with the decision to either leave a tip based on the service you actually received, or based on the situational factors that made your server’s job incredibly difficult. Being a person who receives grace weekly through the body and blood of Jesus, you know what the right choice is: Show your server some grace and give her a generous tip despite the inferior service.

But, let’s say for argument’s sake, you make the wrong choice. You choose the action contrary to what you feel you should do, and betray yourself. You leave a lousy tip. And in the blink of an eye, BOOM! The guilt hits you, and you’re faced with the weight of the lousy tip you left.

…But, the service was still really lousy, right? And, I’m just as important as every other customer there, right? Plus, if that server was waiting a ton of people like that, she probably still made out all right for the evening. I’m really not a tightwad. If that server really wanted to earn a good tip from me, she could have. She wasn’t working to her full capacity. I made the right choice.

You walk out of B’Dubs with no guilt, no shame, and your head held high.

Does this sound familiar? Making a poor choice, and then justifying it by distorting the situation? Think about these questions:

What did you feel about yourself right after you made the choice about the tip?
What about now?
What did you feel towards the server while you were there?
What about now?

If you’re not following me, I’ll help you out. Right as you left the tip, guilt struck you and you felt cheap. You felt bad for ripping your server off. You knew that the poor service was out of her control, and that she was doing her best to keep you and your friends happy.

And now, after distorting the situation to justify your behavior, you see yourself as generous, and the server as a slacker who needs to learn to work harder. Is this even close to reality?

No, it’s not. But it’s what you walked out of BWW believing in order to cope with the self-betrayal, the sin, the poor choice you made.

The author goes on to assert that this kind of self-justifying behavior can become characteristic of us. That, in explaining away our self betrayal, our view of reality becomes distorted, and that we carry those distorted views around with us. I’ll continue the example…

Let’s say you’re back at BWW a couple weeks later and you get the same server as last time. Before she even has a chance to greet you, because of the last interaction with her, you already believe she’s not a very hard worker, and that your experience at BWW is probably going to be a negative one. Your expectations of her performance soar sky-high, and you continue to see yourself as a justified, generous person.

But here’s the clincher, do you suppose the server remembers you? The group of people that she busted her butt to serve and got slapped with slave-wage tips to thank for it – you bet she does! Before she even has a chance to greet you, she already believes you’re a tightwad and that you’re probably going to be demanding more of her than anyone else she’s waiting on. She believes she is a good server, and that she deserves better tips than what you offer.

How do you suppose your interaction with the server will feel for you both? I would guess that the greetings would feel pretty forced seeing as you both actually have pretty negative feelings towards one another (which are based in distortions of reality, remember). I would also venture to say that she would be less inclined to work hard and serve you well because of how you treated her last time, which would further enforce your mis-belief that she’s a poor server.

How well do you suppose you’ll tip her this time? Do you think she’ll be surprised? Probably not…

So, what’s the point? Well, if you look at the example closely, you’ll see that in making the poor choice about the tip, justifying your self betrayal by blaming the server, and interacting with her based on those distorted beliefs, you invited the behavior that upset you in the first place!

By choosing to believe that your server was a lazy person who deserves low tips, you provoked her to believe that you’re an unappreciative tightwad. Thus, she feels that she has no reason to try to earn a good tip from you, and puts very little effort into serving you. Your distorted reality is reinforced, as is hers.

Gosh Luke, that’s a pretty elaborate example with a lot of assumptions.

Yea, it is. But, I can say with 100% certainty that this kind of mutually destructive behavior occurs with EVERYONE to some degree, and most of them are completely unaware of it. It’s certainly not limited to something as tangible as a serving tip either:

I have a friend who finds a particular individual overbearing and annoying, so he goes to great lengths to avoid that person. Consequently, that person tries even harder to get attention from my friend, which annoys her further. Do you suppose my friend should just give that person the time of day, and maybe that would solve her problem?
I know another friend who is extremely opinionated and combative about musical opinions. As such, many of us who know him see him as narrow-minded, and opinionated, and consequently, we feel we have to go to great lengths to justify our opinions to him. And, go figure - that makes him want to argue more. Do you suppose that if he were to lighten up, our views of each other might change?

The examples could go on and on, but I think you get the point. I’ll leave you with a paraphrase of this whole cycle that the author outlined in his book. It’s been a powerful reminder for me to approach every person and every situation as objectively as possible, and to make the choices I know are the ones Christ would make, even if I don’t feel like it at the moment.

Self Betrayal
An act contrary to what I feel I should do for another

When I betray myself, I begin to see the world in a way that justifies my self-betrayal.
When I see a self-justifying world, my view of reality becomes distorted.
So – when I betray myself, I become distorted.
Over time, certain distortions become characteristic of me, and I become them.
By being distorted, I provoke others to be distorted.
While distorted, we invite mutual mistreatment and obtain mutual justification. We collude in giving each other reason to remain distorted.

All Things Work Together...

2008-11-23T19:32:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I'm amazed at how quickly I forget all that God has done for me. I get busy with my life, my every day routine, and I do not stop to thank Him for all the ways He has blessed me.

I was thinking today about the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday weekend, and I started to get sad because I remembered I have to work my 2nd job at the hospital on both Friday and Saturday. This means I'll be making a short trip home to visit my family on Thursday. This really bummed me out because I've been working so much lately, it seems I rarely have a day off and I felt I really needed a couple days to relax and do nothing.

Poor. Me.

Then God told me to shut up, stop complaining, and open my eyes to what He is doing.

In a time where people are losing their jobs left and right, I have been offered overtime at my full time job--an opportunity that was not given to any one else but me. In a time where people are being laid off or cannot find a job, I've been given a 2nd one. It's not just any "2nd job", it's actually the position I held for over 5 years before leaving a couple years ago to move to Omaha (which is where I quickly found out that wherever you go, there you are).

I should back up a little bit to say that I had been praying for many months for an opportunity to make more money so that I could get myself out of debt quicker. Praying A LOT. For a long time I was just waiting and it seemed like nothing was getting better.

And then one Sunday evening as I was leaving church, I ran into an old co-worker and she told me that our friend's (another old co-worker) mother's brain cancer had returned and that she would be needing an extended leave of absence from work while she cared for her. I should also tell you that this woman's cancer was diagnosed 3 1/2 years ago and she was given only 6 months to live at that time. See where I'm going with this?

My 2nd job is working at the hospital for her a few days a month so she can spend some special time caring for her mom.

While my heart breaks for my friend as her mother's health is declining every day, and I can't pretend to know how difficult this time is for both of them, His timing never ceases to amaze me. The sacrifice I’m making by working a couple of extra days is the least I can do for my friend. To that end, He has given her priceless time with her mom that otherwise might not have been possible. And He's given me another reason to be grateful and humbled.

Experieince on Gnome Hill

2008-11-21T12:58:00.000-08:00

Today, I have decided to share my very weird dream I had last night.

You know when you have those dreams that when you wake up, you can remember a lot of it? And if it’s a scary dream you can’t move until you tell yourself that it was just a dream and that it didn’t really happen?

No….. ?

Just me…..? (ya, I can be kinda a wimp sometimes ☺)

Anyway, here is the dream. The title is – Experience on Gnome Hill.

I was standing next to this giant gnome (it didn’t talk or move on it’s own – it was kind of like a tree) and next to me was Jesus (he was real and was talking). So, we were talking and I was facilitating this encounter Jesus was about to have with the Antichrist. And then Jesus went away and the Antichrist came and stood next to me and let out a roar so loud that it shook the giant gnome until it fell on it’s side and started rolling down this hill crushing all the little gnomes below.

Then……

I woke up.

And I had this sense of strong fear come over me. I don’t know why I was so afraid but it was very real to me…. so I started praying to Jesus and I had this revelation.

I can talk to Jesus anytime I want….. He’s real…..and He cares….

Now, I have prayed many times before and believed that Jesus was real, but this was a different kind of revelation. I think it was because I was just standing next to Jesus in my dream and now I was praying to Him.

The same Jesus that was born in a manger.
The same Jesus that grew up and became a great teacher.
The same Jesus who died…. and rose from the dead – allowing me to spend eternity with Him.

That Jesus.

God.

Not some nice thought up idea of what Jesus is.
Not some imaginary person you can pretend to talk to.
Not some hierarchy that doesn’t have time to listen to your fears about a stupid gnome dream.

A loving Jesus. A caring Jesus. An understanding Jesus.

I felt better, and I’m pretty sure that’s not how the apocalypse is going to happen, but you never know….. maybe that was a prophecy about giant gnome being built up right before the second coming….. something to look for I guess. J/K!!!

Chaos and Contradiction

2008-11-20T16:55:00.000-08:00

When I uploaded last week’s blog I knew it would be hard. Let me clarify. I knew that blogging THIS WEEK would be hard. Not that it wasn’t difficult to admit to sitting alone on a Saturday night watching movies while throwing myself a pity party- not pretty stuff. Nor was it particularly easy to admit that Jesus called me on the carpet for stuff. Big stuff. I knew the real challenge, however, would be writing this week. Because I knew that I would probably fail and I knew I would not want to admit it to you.

But I had promised myself that if I was going to do this blog I was not going to waste my time or your time with posturing, pretending or glossing over the truth. Post-moderns hate masks and moderns hardly know how to exist without them. Boomers are so darned driven and so success oriented that what I want to tell you is how great I did at obeying God. Jesus spoke, the Holy Spirit anointed and I immediately responded by giving up what I was supposed to give up and stopping what I needed to stop. I could then follow it with a 3 point teaching on how to walk in obedience, throw in some Greek roots to boot.

Yeah … not the case. Something shifted in my heart, but I still failed.

Hanging out at Immersion is changing me in ways I never expected. And one of those ways is I am learning to be what I have always claimed to value but never truly walked in – being transparent. Transparency is frightening. It is risky. It is uncomfortable. And honestly, transparency in a modern boomer Christian world invites all kinds of mini-sermons and well-meaning but ultimately finger-pointing advice on how not to fail from those to whom you confessed. Boomers have taken Christianity, boiled it down to principles and precepts, and turned it into another project at which we must succeed. New car. Check. Promotion. Check. Obeyed God. Check.

Interestingly enough, the very charge that moderns levy at post-moderns- not believing in absolute truth and the seeming ease of living with sin and without conviction- I am shockingly finding is the very thing that is freeing me to be transparent. In the mix of that I find amazing and breathtaking acceptance.

When I talk about my struggles or (gasp) failures I don’t get raised eyebrows, shocked looks, five ways to fix it or a “come on you can do better” talk. Sometimes I don’t even get a reaction which tempers my self-absorption; like ‘this is not only not a big deal it isn’t a deal at all’. I’m sure it can be argued at length that this is bad. But for me, for right now, it is freedom. Hear me clearly. I am not talking about the liberty to sin but the freedom to be honest about it.

I am learning to sit in my own sinfulness and to be comfortable with it and resist the temptation to hide it, fix it, fudge it or pretend it isn’t there. Like the extra pounds I’ve gained this past year, nothing I put on is going to disguise it and there is no quick fix to get rid of it. I am learning to be at ease with who I am as I am, and it is good.

My logical, linear thinking is starting to make room for the chaos and contradiction of sin and grace. The mask that used to protect is now heavy and suffocating; the image of perfection too exhausting. And if Christianity is all about success, I quit. Because the truth is I am now, always will be and always have been only one thing- a miserable sinner saved by God’s amazing grace. Fatally flawed, passionately loved. How freeing it is to live in the dichotomy of that truth.

Brokenness

2008-11-19T11:10:00.000-08:00

I used to always laugh at the idea of going to the gym to lift weights. The idea of being around a bunch of sweaty people exercising and flexing their muscles in front of mirrors just seems so wrong to me.

Oh well...I enjoy going after work each day. It relaxes me. My mind is usually worn out from the day at the office, but my body needs to expel cooped up energy. So I try not to think too hard while I lift and let my body begin to work.

However, while I was pumping the iron recently, my mind was racing with fascination of how God designed the human body. It is amazing to think that the act of lifting weights does not build the muscle but rather it tears it apart and breaks it down. It is the time of rest after the workout where the muscle is strengthened by the body repairing itself from the damage done during the workout. My workout is really only breaking my body apart...tearing and stretching the muscles. It is while I sleep that my body becomes stronger as the muscle tissues use protein from my diet to mend and repair the broken tissue. The process makes my body stronger...or so I hope.

Isn’t it amazing how God designed our bodies to gain strength through being broken and torn? I think this is true in more than just physical terms.

Have you ever been broken? Maybe you have been at the end of the line, on your knees, humble before God, desperately needing Him to get through a trial in life? OR..maybe you have been broken from the consequences of sin when your actions finally caught up to you? Let me tell you I have been broken many times...both from trials and consequences of sin. I cannot describe in words what a state of brokenness feels like...it is a very humbling experience.

King David knew what it felt like to be broken. Just after Nathan confronted him about his adulterous affair with Bathsheba and his murder of her husband, King David cried out these words to God in Psalm 51:

“Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me — now let me rejoice.”

Looking back at my life over the past few years I can certainly say I was strengthened the most when I was broken. Not physically, but in my spiritual life...deep down within my soul as I turned toward God.

I have been broken many times and will be again I’m sure, but today I rejoice! I am full of joy knowing God has designed us to grow stronger as we turn toward Him when we are broken. God has given me back my joy...and...I am stronger spiritually as well.

Just[ified] Prayer

2008-11-18T12:33:00.000-08:00

For those of you who know me personally, the fact that I’m choosing to wax intellectual about a topic like grammar in prayer will come as no surprise. But, for those of you who don’t know me well, at least give me a paragraph or two to explain myself and at least attempt to save face before you write me off as an obsessive-compulsive grammar nazi.

I have a degree in Technical Communication, which is an emphasis within English. It focuses intensely on audience analysis and determining what method and style of communication will be most effective for said audience based on your findings. It’s rhetoric in a sense, but with the added perks of being anal about grammar and technology, and it’s all rolled into one four-year program. Needless to say, once you’re trained in this type of thinking, it’s tough to turn it off…

I’m the person who laughs at signs that say “ATM Machine”, or chuckles at the redundancy of phrases like “enter into” that pop up all too often in the church these days [sorry Justin, I can’t let this go on any longer]. I’ve also been known to cringe at things like “8:00AM in the morning” or needlessly-elaborate phrases like “in the process of” when simply saying what you’re doing will suffice.

Anyway, I think you get the point. I tend to pay more attention to how people say things than I do to what they’re actually saying. And yes, I realize that’s going to be a major problem with a woman someday, but that’s a battle I’m prepared to fight! But for now, I’m hoping that my quirky brain will have noticed something that you, the beloved Immersion blog reader, will find thought-provoking at the very least.

So, with no further delay, here’s my question:

Have you ever noticed how often we say “just” when we pray?

Think about it. Almost everyone who you hear pray aloud will drop this seemingly harmless word into a prayer to God. “God we just ask that you [verb].” It’s very commonplace language anymore; and even I have to confess to hearing it slip into my prayers now and again.

So, what’s the problem? Well, think about the context in which the word is being used in a prayer. A dictionary suggests “only” or “merely” as synonyms for this use of “just” as an adverb. Linguistically, adding this kind of modifier to a request attempts to shrink the request and make it seem less daunting to the recipient, which therefore makes us feel more justified in asking for it.

Again, I urge you before you read on: Think about it. What are some other times in our lives when we use this kind of language? Who else do you “shrink” your language to in order to seem like less of a liability?

Maybe a friend when you ask to just borrow a couple bucks?
Or to a landlord when you just need a couple more days to get the rent?
Perhaps to a friend or lover you’ve burned who you think just needs to give you another chance?

Call me crazy, but the trend I’m seeing here is that it puts us in a position of beggar, doesn’t it? By framing our requests as such, it seems that we’re acknowledging that the person we’re addressing has power over us and that, in some cases, we feel unworthy to even be asking them for a favor.

Now, be careful not to jump to conclusions. Even I want to ask, “Well, yea, but we’re talking about GOD here! Why WOULDN’T we want to pray as if we’re not worthy? Why SHOULDN’T we feel as if we’re beggars in light of God’s sovereignty?” Well, simply put, we’re not commanded to pray that way.

After Jesus told his disciples how to pray, he gave them a very powerful story about a man in need of bread that I think we could all stand to learn from:

Then he said to them, "Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, 'Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.'
“Then the one inside answers, 'Don't bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can't get up and give you anything.' I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man's boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs.
"So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.”
Luke 11:5-10

Did you catch that? Because of the man’s BOLDNESS, he will receive as much as he needs! The footnote of the NIV says this word could also be translated as persistence.

How do you suppose the man inside with the bread would have responded if the man at the door had asked “Come on, just spare a couple loaves?” I can only assume that he would’ve grown slightly more irritated and probably shooed the “beggar” away from his house and gone back to bed. However, because of the man’s boldness and persistence, he got what he needed!

It’s no accident that this story immediately follows Jesus’ teaching of what we now call the Lord’s Prayer. Jesus is telling us that yes, we do approach God as strangers in need, but that we must pray boldly and persistently! We have no reason to approach God as if we have no business speaking to him. God wants us to speak to him, and tells us exactly the posture to have when we do it! Jesus endured what he did to give us the privilege to speak to God with confidence, as justified people before a glorious God. What a shame to not use it!

So, my friends, as strongly as I can urge you, pray knowing that you’re worthy! Pray knowing that you have every reason to bring even the smallest request to God! Pray boldly for the desires of your heart, and pray persistently without shame because your sins have been forgiven! Don’t just pray, pray BOLDLY!

Fear Not

2008-11-16T18:48:00.000-08:00

I know God is speaking to me when He lays some thing on my heart and then I cannot get it out of my mind. I think about it all the time and then it seems this theme is showing up everywhere in my life. This week, it's been the idea of fear.

I began thinking about this last week in church as I was listening to one of the most powerful sermons I've ever heard. I was moved beyond words. Why? Because I saw myself so much in it....too much. From start of the drama with the girl trying to fight off every temptation thrown at her, to the end when she surrrenders it all to God. That was me...beginning to end. If you were there, you may have seen yourself in it too.

It got me thinking...

What if every person in this church...this city...this country, actually believed this? What if every one saw themselves in that skit? Do we understand the power that could come from all these people being saved?

The reason I ask these questions is because lately as I look around church, I see people I know, friends even. They call themselves Christians. They say they believe in God. They go to church every Sunday. But they aren't exactly Christ-like outside the church walls. I won't go in to specifics...you can probably guess the kind of behaviors I'm referring to. Obviously they have a desire to go to church, otherwise they wouldn't be there. Isn't this desire from God Himself? So what is holding them back from experiencing all that He promises? Why do they continue to engage in a lifestyle that is taking life away from them?

I know what was holding me back and I'm sure I'm not alone - FEAR. Isn't it fear that prevents any one from moving forward? Fear of what your friends might think. Fear of what you might have to give up. Fear of being called to do some thing that doesn't quite fit in to the plans you have made.

People are only afraid of things they do not know, understand, or trust. Fortunately, we have the Bible, God's Word that is nothing but TRUTH. And the truth will set you free. Are you expectant of God's blessings but not willing to be obedient to Him in every area of your life? What is holding you back?

This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. 1 John 1:6

Deep Listening

2008-11-14T14:59:00.000-08:00

Deep listening is miraculous for both listener and speaker. When someone receives us with open-hearted, non-judging, intensely interested listening, our spirits expand.
-Sue Patton

So I have this planner, this Franklin Covey planner that was given to me as a gift from the company when I first started my job.

Not only did it make me feel appreciated and organized, it also was a great test of my decision-making skills because I got to choose the theme of my pages.

I ended up choosing themed pages based on the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

I have never read this book, so I cannot voice an opinion one way or the other, but the combination of nature scenes as well as quotes on the top of each daily page…..

tripped my trigger.

The above quote was from the top of page April 5th.
I made that up, I truly do not know the exact date so if you have the same themed pages please do not stress yourself.

Anyway, I LOVED this quote, and I don’t even know who Sue Patton is (not on Wikipedia, trust me, I checked), but regardless of her lack of Wiki-famousity, I thought this was super insightful.

People love to talk but LOVE to be heard….

There is a difference.

You can totally tell when someone is really listening to you. Not judging, intensely interested, not thinking about the next thing on their list of things to do, truly heart felt listening….. to YOU.

You know what I’m talking about, you can tell. Remember that time when you were trying to explain something to someone and they “heard” you but didn’t really “hear” you. And how did that make you feel?

Devalued
Unappreciated
Unimportant

Good listening is so valuable but so hard to find.

When someone stops what they are doing, looks you in the eyes, sincerely nods along, doesn’t interject with the ever popular “Oh, that happened to me once” “I remember when “I” “I” “I” “I” “MY””MY””MY””MY””ME””MINE””MY TIME, MY THOUGHTS, MY ATTENTION, MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE!!!!”

Not only is it a miraculous thing for the person being listened to… but it is also a miraculous thing for the person doing the listening.

And what Christ promotes!

How did that verse go again? You should be QUICK to what???? What should we be fast to do?? Oh, ya.

Try it for yourself, check your motives when listening to a friend, spouse, family member, etc.

See for yourself.

I often wonder what we could get accomplished if we practiced healthy listening skills.

Meet-Cute

2008-11-12T20:10:00.000-08:00

I had a difficult night Saturday night preceded by my sitting alone for many hours watching Love Actually, The Holiday and Pride and Prejudice back to back. It was a 6 hour and 40 minute British love-story-palooza and yes, I cried and yes I’m a sap and yes I’m a girl and yes I’m single. Probably wasn’t the smartest way to spend a Saturday night.

There is something endearingly enchanting (to women anyway) about the “just happened to run into you, how weird is that, and now we are falling in love” love story. I think it’s the mystical “it can happen at any moment” part that is so beguiling. It catches single women wondering when they enter the grocery store, “Could this be the time? Will I accidentally bump carts with the man who will love me for eternity?” The Holiday calls that a meet-cute. Women call it fate.

Many years ago a Newsweek article spoke words of doom over single women when they pronounced the chances of marrying a man after the age of 40 were slimmer than the chances of being killed in a terrorist attack. A collective cry of horror arose which if you listen closely can still be heard in lonely city streets, seedy hotel rooms and bars late at night. A horror the equal of Munch’s Scream.

Now I get that many of you reading this are no where near close to 40 and probably weren’t even born when that article came out and maybe you never even heard about it (lucky you). I dare say, if you’re single and a woman and a Christian, you know the angst, the ticking clock, the always a bridesmaid, the ‘should I put on makeup before I run out for the paper’ conundrum that defines your days and stalks your often lonely nights.

I turned off the movies and walked the dog for the last time that night and sad to say, no meet-cute. Not in the city streets, not in the elevator, not in the hall outside my loft. My life isn’t like Hollywood- dang it. So I went to bed and cried and felt oh-so sorry for myself and told Jesus all about it. (He was shocked!) (Not.) And interestingly enough He used the fact that He had my attention to talk to me about some things in my life I needed to give up and some things I needed to stop doing. At once. I had an honest to God come to Jesus.

He clearly showed me ways He had blessed my life that were gifts that came straight from my Heavenly Father and things in my life I had badly bunged up by putting my hands in when I had no business. The Isaacs and the Ishmaels. These moments of crystal clarity come so infrequently. Usually life is a muddle. But I could see, really see what needed to be done and had a glimpse of where He may be taking me. Single? Married? I have no clue. He spoke not a word on that issue. I’m reasonably sure I am probably safe from a terrorist taking me out regardless of my marital state. (By the way, that Newsweek article turned out to be bunk though it remains today an urban legend.)

But this is the kicker of the story. When I woke up Sunday morning seeing clearer and knowing what needed to be done, my eye lashes were stuck together and there was this substance the consistency of oil on my eyes. Not the hard crusties like you slept too long. Oil. I am not making this up. All around my eyes- oil. I can only surmise that the Holy Spirit anointed my eyes as I slept. So apparently I did have a meet-cute that night with the greatest of Dates imaginable. Not Hollywood style but a love destined to last an eternity. And only Jesus can truly deliver on a promise like that.

GOD’S ARMS

2008-11-12T09:48:00.000-08:00

It is hard for me to write something today. I won’t try to hide it. Today I am sad and my spirit is torn. Today I cannot offer anything deep or insightful. Today I am on my knees begging to hear from God. I know He is speaking to me; I just cannot hear Him or probably I just don’t want to hear what He is saying. I suppose we all feel this way at times, but so often we cover it up. Honestly, I didn’t want to admit today either. I wanted to put on a fake smile and say life is peachy. Today that doesn’t seem to work. Today I need to know God is holding me close. I need to feel His presence.

Earlier this week I read these verses:

Isaiah 40:10-11, “Yes, the Sovereign Lord is coming in power. He will rule with a powerful arm. See, he brings his reward with him as he comes. He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart.”

Throughout scripture, we are reminded of God’s awesome power and authority. Nothing seems to symbolize His mightiness and justice like that of His arms. Reading these verses a I get the picture of a king holding his scepter or a battle-proven warrior holding his sword. I see the mental picture of a strong, muscular arm being flexed showing incredible strength.

Today I need to believe the second part of those verses. I need to believe the powerful arms of God...the same arms and hands that created this ever-expanding universe...are the same gentle, loving arms that are holding me close to His heart. I need to believe all the power of God is being funneled through His arms as He holds me.

God – today I pray and ask you to hold me close. Today I need to feel the warmth of your chest and the strength of your arms. I want to hear your heartbeat...the heart that loves me so much you were willing to give everything that I might live. May I rest in your arms today knowing you are holding me close. I know there are others who need to feel your presence today as well. I ask you to hold them close to your heart. May they hear your heart beating with love for them like never before.

Can you feel the strength in His loving arms?

Can you feel the warmth of His chest?

Can you feel His heartbeat?

I pray that you do.

So I'll stand... if everyone else does...

2008-11-11T08:46:00.000-08:00

The popular stance on worshiping God with song is that we should sing the songs for an audience of one. The ideal is that our hearts are so focused on God that we’re almost completely oblivious to what is happening around us. We are so caught up in praising God for his love that we can’t help but sing along to the music and shake whatever moneymaker he may or may not have blessed us with. :)

But, when we’re completely honest, that’s rarely the case - myself included. It’s nearly impossible to close our eyes, throw our hands in the air to God, and completely forget about the six complete strangers in close proximity. Granted, some of us are incredibly shameless with our worship (and my hat’s off to you), but for most of us, it’s a struggle. It’s as if we’re more concerned about someone around us having an awkward impression or thought of us than we are with telling our creator that we’re grateful for him. Sound silly? Well, it should. It is!

But, have you noticed that seeing the people around you engaged deeply and honestly in worship seems to relieve the fear you have of cutting loose and praising Jesus? Sure, it’s easy enough to just say, “Yea, it’s easier for you to not look like a fool if everyone around you is doing it too!” And that’s a fair point if all you’re concerned with is what everyone around you thinks.

I believe there’s more to it - there has to be. If our own ability to worship hinges on the behavior of those around us, I hate to say it, but we’re going to leave worship services very empty, very often. I don’t aim to make any conclusive point here, but more to just think out loud and provoke some thought or good discussion.

Is it possible that there’s something unseen that happens when someone fully engages in worship? Does it affect the people nearby?

Personally, I’d say yes with 100% certainty. If there’s one thing that will happen consistently, it’s that when I leave a service feeling as though I experienced God in a more powerful way than I had in a long time, a handful of other people will approach me and say the same thing. I believe there’s a synergism that comes when even one person is fully engaged in worship around other people.

It’s difficult to explain. Some people are comfortable with just referring to this concept as the Holy Spirit’s presence, but some want to explore it more and explain what happens. Both are ok!

So, what do the rest of you think? I’m curious to hear people’s thoughts on praising God with song and what things are happening between our reaching hands and beating hearts.

"For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."

Patient Healing

2008-11-09T14:26:00.000-08:00

When I was a freshman in college living in the dorms, I had a minor mishap with my loft ladder one morning as I was attempting to get down from bed and hurry my way to class. As I placed my left foot down on the step, the step splintered in half, with the nail that was once holding it in place now piercing my leg deeply. As if that pain wasn't bad enough, the nail quickly carved down my leg another 8 inches as I fell to the floor. Not a straight, clean cut, but a curved, crooked, jagged gash. It was obvious this wasn’t going to be easily put back together.

I hobbled across campus to Student Health where I received at least 40 stitches. I now had a giant red and purple "S" shape down my leg...not pretty. The cut was so deep, almost to the muscle, and I was told if I wanted it to heal properly, I needed to restrain from any physical activity for the next 4 weeks. Not good news considering I was on the women’s tennis team and we were leaving for the annual spring break meet in a week. I had been anticipating that trip for months. Meltdown ensued. I thought my life was over (at 18 years old, I clearly had a lot to learn!) I was so angry, replaying the incident over and over in my mind and trying to answer the question “Why me???”

For months I did what I could to help minimize scarring...I would dutifully massage Vitamin E and every anti-scarring medication I could find and cover it in a silicone wrap every night. But any time I wore shorts, people would say "what happened to your leg???" I was so frustrated...the discoloration was actually getting darker, not lighter. I wanted plastic surgery, a quick fix.

Now eleven years later, the scar is barely visible. Definitely not a quick healing, but a process that occured over time as a result of taking care of it properly. Yet it was hard to trust those who knew best--those who said that it would eventually be invisible. Those who said the dark, ugly scar was simply a part of the healing process.

What about our scars inside that nobody can see? The scars that developed as a result of someone hurting us. The scars that arose from the pain of another failed relationship...the end of a life long friendship...rejection…failure to meet our own expectations or the expectations of others. How are we caring for those wounds? Do we even acknowledge they are present? Or do we just go on about our lives, pretending as if everything is great and we've never been hurt? Packing our days so full of busyness that we never have time alone with ourselves and God to admit that our hearts, the very wellspring of life (Proverbs 4:23), are in need of some serious healing? I think often times it's easy to avoid. After all, no one is probably going to ask you (although they may be thinking it), "what happened to your Heart???" like they did my leg.

But a friend did ask me a few months ago "how is your heart these days?" Truthfully, I had never given it much thought, probably because the answer would've exposed a side of me I never wanted any one to see. If I cared so much about healing a scar on my leg, why was I not as concerned about healing my heart? It does, after all, determine the course of my life.

The scars on my leg and in my heart weren’t straight paths, but crooked ones. Isn't that how God gets us to where He wants us? The long, crooked, and sometimes ugly path? But He gets us there, without a doubt.

If I was asked that question today – “How’s your heart?” – my answer would be so much different. Healed, not broken. Better, not bitter. And yet just a little bit scarred, but in such a promising way. Scars always remain as reminders of where we were, how far we’ve come, and how we got there. They help us recount what God has done for us and they remind us of who God is – the Great Physician who heals. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually.

Organization

2008-11-07T08:34:00.000-08:00

Organization… being organized…. Everything has a place and everything in its place. This is a life lesson that has taken me YEARS to learn and I’m still learning. When I was little I was the complete opposite of a “neat freak” my idea of cleaning my room was to shove all my toys under my bed. My thought process was “out of sight, out of mind” ….. right?!?! I mean if nobody else can see it, then does it truly exist? And to be honest I thought I was completely fine with this logic…. until the time came when my mom would say to me “Hey, Jodi – where is (FILL IN THE BLANK)? I would get this sick to my stomach feeling because I knew that I had to “come clean” (as corny of a line as it is). I remember just mountains upon mountain of toys pulled from under my bed. To me it was overwhelming… I didn’t want to start dealing with the problem because I didn’t even know where to start. I needed help. I needed someone who was blessed with the gift or organization to help me. I couldn’t do it on my own. And so I went to the person who I knew was the expert, my sister. She would put me to work and tell me where things should go and come along side me and help me figure out this overwhelming task. And when we were done, there was this peace that came over me. A weight was lifted. I didn’t have anything to hide. I was free.

I do this with my heart too. My feelings get shoved away, to deal with them at another juncture. If I push them away, they’re gone… right? I mean out of mind out of heart? And a lot of the time I am completely fine with this logic… until the time comes when God asks me “Hey Jodi, where is (FILL IN THE BLANK)? Ahhh, what? Not now God, I don’t want to deal with this… stop trying to refine me for goodness sakes, I’m tired of it. I can deal with this problem on my own, in my own time. I don’t need you. And then the pile gets bigger and harder to hide. When it’s finally pulled out, it’s overwhelming and I don’t know where to start. So I go to the expert, my Savior. And He stays along side of me, helping me figure things out and deal with them. He takes my problems and lifts them off of my shoulders, showing love in its truest form. A weight is lifted. I don’t have anything to hide. I am free.

Many Pounds on Dog

2008-11-06T05:33:00.000-08:00

Rasta Dog (name changed to protect the not-so-innocent) flushed up a wounded bird on our walk today. Cities are hard on birds. Not because of why you might think- the obvious lack of trees and green space. I think they do just fine with building nests in the nooks and crannies of tall buildings. It’s because those same buildings which give them shelter can spell their doom if they fly into a window six stories up. I have seen three dead and one wounded bird in the last few weeks. It makes me feel sad.

And then it stirs another curious sensation. Every time I see one of these fallen birds I immediately think of what Jesus said about how not even a sparrow falls from the sky without Him knowing about it. I think then I extrapolate. I ponder how many birds there are in the world and how many died today. I consider how many hairs there are that fell today from the how many heads there are in the world. I think and then doubt. How in the world could God possibly know all the birds, all the hair, all the heads and all our thoughts? At once? Seriously? Not possible.

I have been a Christian long enough to have had many wrestles with my intellect concerning God and the Bible. I remember struggling with the account of Jonah trapped in the fish belly for three days. Not possible, said I. Gastric juices would have eaten him from the outside in. Lot’s wife turning to salt makes a great point about getting on with kingdom business but did it actually happen? I think not. However Jesus affirmed both those accounts making them either true or Him a liar. Not a liar is my vote.

As I matured so did my doubts. Casting a legion of demons into swine? Why? Why not just send them to the dry and arid places and leave the poor swine owner his livelihood? Why make a paste of spit and mud when you can speak a word? Why didn’t You heal my marriage God when I prayed for so … many … years? Why? Why? Why? I don’t get it, Lord. Why?

I have been a Christian long enough to know that wrestles of the intellect end in one place- with a bowing of my knee. My brain is just not capable of grasping in entirety God’s power and might and sovereignty nor understanding His purposes, reasoning, will or plans. At the end of the day, after playing with my doubts the way my tongue plays with a rough new filling, I bow to His majesty and give up the need to understand and mysteriously the doubt turns to, “Of course You know all the sparrows that fall. Why wouldn’t You … You’re God!”

Rasta Dog didn’t hurt that fallen bird pathetic in its attempts to hop/fly away. I had mercy on the wounded bird and played God for a minute and used the fact that I have many pounds on Dog to pull her away and today, I may not have done much, but today I saved a bird. The bird fell and I saw it and I cared. Why shouldn’t I believe that God knows and cares about all the birds that fall and knows and cares about all of us even more?

My Soul Craves Truth

2008-11-05T09:42:00.000-08:00

Have you ever been told a lie? Have you ever looked someone in the eye and asked for the truth only to get a flat out lie in response when you know it is a lie? It can hurt deeply. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself why does it hurt to be told a lie? Why does it frustrate us when we have been told a lie? Lies certainly hurt but even worse...they destroy trust. Why is it that it can take years to build trust and earn a good reputation, but one little lie can throw that all out the door?

I think the answer to all these questions are found deep down within our very own souls. I believe everyone was created with certain cravings within their soul. For example, at the very core of who we are, we all desire intimacy, to be loved, and to love. Also, we all desire to have meaning, purpose and significance. Just like these, I believe we all have a craving for truth. Think about it. We all want to know the truth. In life, every day we are subconsciously determining if things we are being told are true or not...do we believe it or not...can we trust the source or not. Where does this desire for truth come from? Why do we search for truth all day, every day, in all that we do, and in all we are told?

What are we craving when we seek truth? OR...is the question really who are we craving? Is our instinctive quest for truth really an instinctive quest for the source of all truth...God? Think through this with me. What is it about knowing the truth that comforts us and gives us peace and rest within our spirits? Why is it that when we do not know the truth we yearn for it and search for it and are not satisfied until we know the truth? I think this characteristic at the very core of who we are as human beings cannot be explained any other way than it was created within us by the source of all truth. Did God place within our souls the desire to seek truth so we would ultimately seek the source of all truth...God himself?

Reading my morning devotional earlier this week, I was reminded of this truth: God cannot tell a lie. The devotional discussed how this is not a weakness in God but a display of complete power. What is impossible for God? Nothing is impossible for Him due to lack of power; only what is contrary to His nature is impossible. God cannot limit His fullness and cannot change His nature. He is who He is and this does not show a weakness, but rather the absence of weakness shows His complete power.

Hebrews 6:18-19, “So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary.”

God cannot tell a lie. This reminder was so comforting to me this week. Why? Because I know I can trust my God. I can believe everything He has ever told me. I can believe all His promises to be true such as: He loves me, He is with me, He is never changing, He is faithful, He is in control, and He is working all things for the good of those who love Him...just to name a few! I don’t know about you, but I know my soul craves truth...my soul craves the source of all truth...my soul craves God. There is so much comfort and peace in knowing the truth, even more in knowing the source of truth, and words cannot express the comfort and peace in knowing God. What does your soul crave? Are you searching for truth? Do you know God?

Salvation in 30 minutes or less, or it's free!

2008-11-04T07:07:00.000-08:00

Last week on www.bedeviant.com J-wise posted a pretty sweet quote from a guy named Rhett Smith. In this quote, Smith suggests that we have strayed away from the style of teaching that Jesus used with his disciples, and that our doing so is preventing people from actually taking time to read, study, and extract meaning from scripture, which would lead to a much greater understanding and more durable faith as a result.

It’s as if the road that leads us to an end isn’t important anymore, which is a silly notion to say the least. Imagine if we were to engineer a type of pill that could provide us with all of the nourishment we would ever need in a day. This pill could contain every vitamin, mineral, and calorie a person could ever use from morning to night. As long as we’re talking crazy, let’s say it contains the necessary hormones to stave off any sort of hunger we would ever feel as well.

Knowing how amazing food is, could you do it? Could you sacrifice the enjoyment of sinking your teeth into an ooey-gooey, warm-and-toasty, extra sloppy-melty piece of pizza? Could you forego twirling and slurping each tomato and parmesan-drenched spaghetti noodle as you glance around the table trying to see who’s going to steal the last breadstick? Could you go the rest of your life without carving your way through a delightful blend of ice cream and whatever candy your little heart happened to be pining for as you stepped up to the counter?

I mean, as long as we are getting what we ultimately need from food, there’s no point in the process, right? Why bother with all the ceremony when we could provide ourselves with everything food provides in the blink of an eye by swallowing a pill?

Obviously I’m being facetious to demonstrate the absurdity of the example and questions I’ve posed. But, why do we approach a relationship with Jesus this way?

As Christians, we meander about talking about the most satisfying, fulfilling relationship anyone could ever know. We swear up and down that the ways of the world are repulsive and are to be avoided at all costs, yet it seems that we can get caught up in approaching our loving savior in the same way that we approach a flame-broiled Whopper. I want it my way, and I want it now!

At what point did we decide that hearing from God was work? And when exactly did we lose any and all appreciation for the journey of reading, studying, and meditation on God’s living word? And most dishearteningly of all, have we really been led to believe that if we simply manage to glean all of the “lessons” from the Bible that we’ll finally “get it”? We’ve been offered eternal salvation, and a promise from an everlasting God that He will walk hand-in-hand with us through every joy and trial in our lives. And instead of walking by his side, we’re trying to drag God by the hand and hurry him along as if we have somewhere else we’d rather be.

Of course our culture isn’t going to change anytime soon. It’s on us to put our approach to our relationships with Jesus in perspective. We’re faced with a myriad of decisions everyday, and by making a choice to endure and enjoy the journey instead of instantly rewarding ourselves, we can slowly teach our hearts to have a greater faith in God’s timing.

So, the next time your pastor doesn’t answer every question you had about a topic, maybe you can do the research yourself and let God show you the answers instead of just sending an email to your pastor and taking the easy way out. Or maybe the next time you’re facing a difficult trial, you can pray for the faith and wisdom to endure the suffering rather than for a swift conclusion. Even if you’re thumbing through the pages of God’s word and you end up confused by what you just read, try thanking God for the opportunity to explore the depths of his love because, deep down, you know that working through it will be much more gratifying and worthwhile than swallowing a pill.

Free Will Free Grace

2008-11-02T19:57:00.000-08:00

Free Will...this tiny little gift that each and every one of us has been given. The freedom to choose what we want to do, which path to take...pretty much the ability to make any decision related to our life completely on our own. Sounds pretty amazing, don't you think? After all, it is OUR life, let's do what we want with it!

I find it ironic that "free will" is actually called such because in reality it gives us anything but freedom, especially when it leads us to behaviors that shape us in to something so far off from what God had made us to be. In the beginning, the choices we make apart from God may not seem like a big deal; they may not seem all that detrimental to our character. But before you know it, all of these small choices that are made day in and day out have developed into this huge burden to bear and we are left feeling lonely and confused, asking ourselves "Who have I become and how did I get here??" Yep, I've been there.

Lucky for us, God will only allow us to screw things up so badly before He hits us with circumstances that make us realize we can do nothing without Him. Lucky for us, He is all about second chances. Lucky for us, God will never stop loving us. These are amazing promises that I did not fully understand until I started surrounding myself with people who know who they are simply because of their relationship with Christ.

As I look back on the past year, I am blown away at how God's grace has changed my life. He has broken a vicious cycle I fought for so long and over a few months time has transformed feelings of hopelessness and guilt into a sense of peace and contentment. Isn't it amazing that He has the power to do that...to take away burdens I thought I would have to deal with everyday for the rest of my life...to rid me of the behaviors and relationships that were not honoring to Him...to change my heart that much?

When we can finally humble ourselves to the fact that we've really messed things up, acknowledge that we need God, and truly make Him the center, THINGS WILL CHANGE. His amazing plan for each of us is so much easier to see when all the old junk is finally gone...circumstances begin to change, you can see where God is working in your life, and there is so much hope in that. The only question I'm left asking now is, why'd I wait so long?

"He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions." Psalm 107:20

I Am Des Moines

2008-10-30T14:43:00.000-07:00

The fierce winds that blew so cold and strong this weekend had another effect besides breaking me out of the denial that winter is coming. I love Iowa and I love Iowans but this east coast born and bred really doesn’t like Iowa winter. Especially when the arctic front drops just below Des Moines making it feel more like Canada than the Midwest. And the infamous winter white-outs … what’s up with that? I neither heard nor experienced that in the east coast. Nor flesh-freezing weather; seriously, is that necessary? But I digress.

I live downtown which is usually, remarkably for a city, neat and clean. We have our dumpsters for our trash and neat little poop bag dispensers for dog owners like me to keep the sidewalks and small grassy strips clean. Most buildings have some kind of container out front for cigarette butts and we even have street people who regularly swing by and collect cans and bottles to redeem for the five cent deposit.

Every few weeks you see groups of people wearing matching Principal or Wells Fargo t-shirts, laughing and enjoying a “day off” from work as they volunteer to walk around the city and pick up trash. Des Moines is a great place to live, made even better by how clean it is. This past weekend, however, the winds they did blow. And they blew and howled and tore down allies and in the process helped themselves to whatever they could find in the dumpsters. Trash and lots of it was lifted and carried and deposited all over the streets and sidewalks and buildings. Isn’t it amazing how long it takes to clean and how fast a mess can be made? Des Moines was a mess.

I am Des Moines. I am a mess. I have a dumpster that I do my best to stash my trash in and I try really hard to keep the top down so no one can see or smell it. I think that only I know its contents and as long as I can keep it contained I look good to the rest of the world. My streets are clean. Problem is, now and again the winds come and lift the top and spread the contents around and low and behold, there is my stinky garbage visible and in plain sight and in all kinds of places it shouldn’t be. How humiliating. And I remember again the futility of trying to keep myself clean and how even my very best efforts are always in vain.

Thankfully I have a God who is neither too ashamed nor too proud to walk my streets and clean up my mess. God, the Creator of the universe, dons a t-shirt, takes up a garbage bag and one of those pointy sticks and stabs up my sins, cleans up my hurts, lifts up my offenses, sweeps away my pride, and sets me to rights again. This isn’t His day off; this is His daily work! And He does this with patience and grace and with so much love for me regardless my state. Jesus- my Savior, my King- and my ever humble and oh-so gentle garbage man … how incredibly amazing is that?

Can I trust God...even when it hurts?

2008-10-29T11:38:00.000-07:00

I just started a new journal. Last week I put aside the one I was using for more than a year with the pages full of prayers and notes about daily life circumstances. As I put the old one down, I flipped through its pages and looked back on where I have been through the past year or so. The year was full of wonderful blessings and new friendships but it was also full of hard and confusing trials. It is always incredible to look back and see how God was working in my life each day and in all those life situations. My God was with me each step of the way and it is more amazing how he used all those life circumstance and trials to mold me into who I am today and to teach me lessons I hope to never forget. He taught me about patience, about forgiveness, and about love. He taught me so much about the depths of His heart and His love for me as I discovered the depths of my own heart and love for others. Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” I could not see it at the time, but as I look back, I can see how God kept His promise to me. He did work all those things together for my good.

Yet, here I am today in the midst of another trial and I am so quick to forget that God is working in this situation as well. I know what the lesson is this time. God wants to teach me about trust. Like the other lessons I learned, this one will not be easy either. I learned patience cannot be learned in a hurry or right away...it just doesn’t work that way. I learned forgiveness does not mean to ignore the pain and forget what happened, but to choose to not hold hard feelings and to love anyways. I learned love is a more than fuzzy feelings but a choice that needs to be made in the good times and bad times, in the ups and the downs, in the highs and the lows. Now I am learning about trust...not just about trusting God when everything in life is wonderful but when life is not fun, things hurt, and life is confusing.

For most of my life I have been a Christian and it is always so easy to say “I trust God” without really putting much thought behind the words. Now I ask myself, “can I trust God...even when it hurts?” Is He really working in this situation for my good even though it may not be going the way I want it to go. I so badly want to take control the situation and want answers from God right away (there is that patience issue again). I want to do this my way and in my timing and in the way I think it should go. I am so quick to forget that I tried that before once and it didn’t turn out so hot. I am not very good at being God. He is much better at it. He knows what He is doing. I realize I need to trust in Him. I need to trust in Him knowing He is in complete control of the situation and is working “ALL things” for good in my life in His perfect timing. Even though I cannot see it today and most certainly cannot feel it today, I will choose to trust in God. Even as I write these words I am discovering that as I make the choice to trust God, my inner spirit is filled with joy and peace knowing I am in God’s hands and in the very midst of His will for my life. I am excited to see what this trial looks like on the other end and learn all that God wants to teach me through it. I am sure someday in the future I will look back on these pages of my new journal and once again see how God was with me the entire time working the situation for good in my life.

James 1:2-3, “Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.”

So...can I trust God even when it hurts? Yes, absolutely...because God is completely sovereign, infinite in wisdom, and perfect in love. I am reading a great book called Trusting in God Even When Life Hurts by Jerry Bridges. Check it out...I can’t put it down.

Spicy Truth with a Large Diet Coke

2008-10-28T14:40:00.000-07:00

Last night I was enjoying a steak burrito from Panchero’s with a little pico, hot sauce, and a handful of jalapeños. A buddy and I had decided to discuss some Immersion worship ideas, and out of nowhere, he hit me with some knowledge. It was one of those things that I had always felt and known deep down, but never heard someone put it to words in such a way that I saw it as a relevant truth.

I started coming to Immersion several years ago. Being a musician myself, I really dug the worship music, but I also really learned a lot from the messages. It was a time I looked forward to every week. But inevitably after I had been a regular for months on end, I started hearing overlap. I could sing half the songs with my eyes closed, and I could extract the point of a message long before the speaker ever got there. I felt as though I wasn’t learning anymore, or that the feeling I got from being convicted every week was gone for good. I was slowly losing my motivation to attend Immersion, and church in general.

Naturally, I think a lot of us get to this point sometime or another. The great thing about God’s word is that it’s consistent, and you can draw the same conclusion from tons of different verses. However, that also means that for us big-picture thinkers, we may not feel challenged consistently as these concepts become second nature. Or, regrettably, we may become bored and lose interest in a relationship with God as we feel it has become stagnant or that we’ve “learned everything.”

Now, obviously that’s not true, but we can’t deny that we all get that feeling sometimes. It goes without saying that we can all use good reminders of teachings, some more frequently than others, but when your entire relationship with God feels like nothing but a series of reminders, what do you do? Luckily for us, God sends along people like mi amigo en Panchero’s…

Get involved.

Seriously, just get up and do something! The knowledge that I digested along with my succulent Amerimexican cuisine was that serving a ministry, no matter how seemingly insignificant the role, changes your heart for it completely.

When you contribute your time and effort to a body of believers, you gain a new perspective. The instant you decide to show up a bit early and hand out bulletins, you’re no longer a bored spectator, but a herald of good news. With each piece of bread you break off and pass to your brothers and sisters during communion, you step closer and closer to furthering the ministry as a whole rather than idly watching it pass by. Even choosing to reach out to someone with something as small as a joyful greeting spreads Christ’s love like wildfire.

In short, you’re helping the ministry expand and prepare itself to serve people who were just like you, years ago, walking in for the first time. If you don’t believe me, try it and see for yourself!

It certainly doesn’t even have to be Immersion either!

Offer up some of your free time to help a ministry grow, and you’ll see how quickly God changes your heart for the ministry itself and the people involved. We’re commanded to serve one another in love, not because God needs us to make huge ministries or churches, but because God knows that serving one another in love is one of many things that He made us to do, and that it ushers in His presence and fills us up!

You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
Galatians 5:13-14

Who knew that burritos were such an enlightening entrée?

2008-10-27T06:30:00.000-07:00

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk.

Some friends invited me to lunch at their house yesterday. There were a lot of people there I hadn't met before. A friend introduced me to this person, told me his name and we shook hands. I said "So nice to meet you 'so and so'." I say 'so and so' because I literally repeated his name back but was not listening at all. I was so wrapped up in everything going on around me, I could not remember what he had told me his name was just 20 seconds earlier!

About an hour later I left, was driving in my car on my way to the bookstore and talking to my mom on my cell phone. I asked her a question, she began to answer, and before she could even get the answer out I would interrupt with another question that was completely unrelated. This went on for about 5 minutes before she finally said “Can we get back to your first question?”

I am feeling especially convicted by my behavior yesterday. Aside from being rude, it got me thinking. If I listen this attentively to friends and family who are physically with me, how well do I listen to what God is trying to tell to me through His Holy Spirit? Am I stopping or even slowing down to listen to what He is saying back to me? There are some days I feel like I am in a constant conversation with God, but so often it's this one-sided dialogue because I never shut up long enough to hear what He wants to say! Some times I’m not even focused on what I’ve just asked Him!

God desires a relationship with us. Have you ever been in a relationship or had a friendship with someone and you felt like all they did was talk about themselves? I have, and it drove me nuts...I imagine God feels the same way.

"Let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance." Proverbs 1:5

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 5.19.08

2008-05-19T11:30:00.001-07:00

I’m currently reading a very interesting book. It’s called “Christ and Culture” by H. Richard Niebuhr, and it’s 50 years old.

I included that last bit about the book’s age because if you’re even a casual student of culture, you understand that culture changes - that is its nature. The culture of the U.S. was vastly different 50 years ago than it is today (example: a gallon of gas 50 years ago cost $0.19 compared to the $3.56 we have here in Des Moines this morning!), yet this book reads as though it was written yesterday. (“Culture,” Niebuhr says, “holds its inhabitants as the sea holds a fish.” How great is that!)

Niebuhr discusses the different postures that Christians normally take towards the culture they find themselves in. They read like this:

Christ against Culture: Christians and the pagan culture are at odds; at war.

Christ of Culture: The movements of Christ can be found within the historicity of a culture.

Christ above Culture: The current world in which we find ourselves living acts a “waiting room” for the Christian - more of a nuisance than anything.

Christ and Culture in Paradox: Christians and the surrounding culture and in a struggle of disbelief that will ultimately be determined by the ending of time.

Christ Transforming Culture: The Christian here believes that God is moving in the here and now, actively transforming the culture in the present, and not just when Christ returns.

I may have totally just nerded out and lost you all, but do you see yourself/Christians you know fitting into any of these categories? If you are a Christian, what’s your position towards culture? Towards the world in which we live in?

Miracle Night: GOD STORIES

2008-04-04T12:33:00.000-07:00

Well, that was fun.

Last night was Immersion's first ever Miracle Night and, by the sounds of it, God showed up in some very cool, very tangible ways:

Spiritually
Emotionally
Physically
Financially

We want to capture some of the pictures of what God did and is continuing to do after last night.

That's why we'd like you to post your God stories in the comment section of this post. You can post anonymously if you'd like or you can tell us who you are - either way we just want to know what God did/is up to in your life after last night!

So come, share your stories... Tell one, tell all! Bless you...

"They triumphed... by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony!"

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 3.31.08

2008-03-31T11:53:00.000-07:00

In the words of Mike & The Mechanics, "All I need is a miracle/All I need is you."

Immersion is having its first ever Miracle Night this coming Thursday. What's a Miracle Night? Well, we're going to ask God to show up and do... well... miracles.

Blind eyes would be opened.
The bondage of debt would be broken over the lives of young adults.
Depression and anxiety would be healed.
Unbelievers would become believers in and followers of Jesus Christ.

Those, good people of Des Moines, are miracles. Events that do not happen in our normal, everyday level of existence... But maybe could and should (and if we're real honest, we want to have happen in our lives on a regular basis).

Now, some of you might be conjuring pictures of a televangelist with cuff links and slicked back hair, placing his hand on the forehead of a poor, old woman in a wheelchair and saying something like, "and now, be healed in the name of Juh-hee-sus-uh! And for only a $1,000 love gift, you too can be healed in Jesus' Name! We now accept credit and debit cards!"

Oops. Did I step on anyone's toes?

Here's Reality #1 for you and me: God desires to move in your life in miraculous way. Whether it's fixing your finances, healing the scars of sexual abuse, healing your lower back problems, or changing the way that you see God (and, consequently, yourself and others), God wants to show up in your life.

Here's Reality #2: God will not force himself into our lives. "Jesus is a gentleman," I heard it said once. A gentleman is always invited in, he never forces his way in. God is the same way - he will not force himself into our lives, he must be invited. I truly believe there are mountains of exciting things God wants to do in our lives, we just need to ask. Matter of fact, let's look at what Jesus said:

“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened."

I'd like to invite you to ask God for a miracle. Better yet, come and join us this Thursday at Immersion 7:37pm for Miracle Night. You don't even have to buy all this Jesus stuff, just give God a chance to show you how good he is.

May the Lord bless you and keep you on this Monday morning...

Justin

Tradition.

2008-03-11T14:09:00.001-07:00

Jesus once said, "You ignore God's law and substitute your own tradition." He said this to a group of people who were known for being extremely "religious".

They said the "right" things.
They did the "right" things.
They had the "right" doctrine.

Yet, for Jesus, these were some of the most misled and dangerous people around.

They were the ones who hassled him the most.
They were the ones who hated him the most.
They were the ones who had him pinned to a cross in a garbage dump.

In most cases, it seemed as though Jesus and the "religious people" were following a different God, so much so, that Jesus once called the religious leaders "children of hell" and that their "true father" was none other than Satan himself! As I've said before in other posts, Jesus reserved his harshest words not for the raunchiest sinner, but for the disillusioned religious elite!

The religious leaders (a.k.a. "children of hell") were so dangerous because they were perceived as being God's ambassadors - as reflecting the character and nature of who God was and what he was like. They were the ones who people looked to in order to tell them what God thought about them and how they were to think of him.

Jesus would get so angry with them (and still does, in my opinion) because they misrepresented God the Father and what he was like. Jesus is the true reflection of God because he is God. What we see in Jesus and what we see in the religious leaders could not be more diametrically opposite:

Religious leaders said "do" in order to be acceptable to God.
Jesus said "be" the child of God, the image bearer, that you already are.

Religious leaders heaped oppressive demands onto their followers.
Jesus said, "my yoke is easy, my burden (weight, load to carry) is light."

Religious leaders kept mental records of their own sin as well as the sins of others.
Jesus said, through his Spirit, "I will remove your sin from you as far as the east is from the west and remember it no more."

As you can see, when we choose to follow tradition - human religious tradition that has the appearance of godliness but denies the power of the Gospel - we're in, as they say, "deep doo-doo". Jesus desires nothing by wrote, but a deep and living interaction with him through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Have you considered this for your own religious walk? Does your walk with God resemble an empty, lifeless, religious tradition or is it a vibrant and alive interaction between you and Jesus Christ? Consider the implications of each...

Peace to you on this Monday morning...

Justin

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 3.06.08

2008-03-05T19:33:00.000-08:00

Something struck me as I was preparing for my message this week: Jesus thinks very highly of us.

Jesus thinks highly of us because he’s God. If Jesus is God and God is Jesus and Jesus not only loves us but actually likes us, then that would mean that God feels the same way about you and about me.

God honors you (Isaiah 43:4).
God calls you “very good” (Genesis 1:31).
God, in fact, loves you (1 John 4:9-11).

I think this struck me so hard because I wonder how many people really believe this? Christians included! Most of us - if only subconsciously - believe that God is mostly mad at us and is really disappointed with our lives. He’s standing in heaven with a long, flowing beard, checklist and clipboard and a sharpened #2 pencil in hand, constantly checking our behavior, scribbling on his checklist and clucking his tongue whenever we goof up.

My question is simply, “who would want to follow a God like that?”

Not me.

Luckily enough, that’s not the God of Scripture and it’s not God the Father of Jesus Christ. Even as I write these words, I can feel a weight being lifted off of my shoulders... God is not mad at me!

Would you take a moment during your day and ask yourself the question, “how do I think God sees me?” Then ask yourself a second question, “how do I see God?” Those two questions, G.K. Chesterton says, are “the most important beliefs” someone has.

God is good. Good is God. God says we’re “very good” (Genesis 1:31). Any questions?

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 2.27.08

2008-02-27T13:58:00.000-08:00

I don't get why anyone would not like Jesus, but I can understand why people don't like Christians.

In the past few months, I think God has led me into experiences that have allowed me to see what non-Christians see. Whether it's money or judgmentalism or fundamentalism or bigotry (or worse), I can see the lineage of stereotypes that plague Christians and the Christian church.

I was at a concert that was put on by Christians that had significantly less people in attendance than the promoters had bargained for. Less people = less money. I found my jaw on the floor when one of the promoters interrupted the concert to take them mic and ask the audience, "what would Jesus want you to do? We need $150,000 to break even at this concert and we want you to pray about giving sacrificially in order to help us get out of the hole financially." Then he ended in prayer. I was appalled. Jesus reserved the harshest of reprimands for religious leaders who use guilt to meet their own personal needs. (Luke 20:45-47, 21:1-4)

I was in a conversation with an agnostic and another Christian. The Christian insisted on calling the agnostic a "heathen", even after the agnostic asked him not to. What was worse was the Christian had no idea that what he was saying was highly offensive to the agnostic (and to me, nonetheless). God says that human beings - all human beings - are created in his image. In the image of God he created us. (Genesis 1:27)

I hear multiple stories of how people left the church of their youth because they were constantly threatened with the fires of hell and damnation - essentially petrified to step foot in the church ever again for fear of being struck down by lightning. Their image of God is not a loving Father, but a detached, crotchety, old miser who desires nothing more than to smite them and send them packing to the lake of fire and burning sulfur. God is not willing that any should die in their sins, but that everyone would come to a saving knowledge of who he is (2 Peter 3:2). Guilt and fear are not God's primary motivator (1 John 4:18), but it is his kindness that leads people to follow him through a relationship with Jesus Christ (Romans 2:4).

All that to say this: Jesus is good. God is good. The Holy Spirit is good. We, as the Church, sometimes really screw it up.

There, I said it.

In the pages of Scripture, I have met a Jesus who loves sinners - who loves to be with those who have no pretense about them. He loves to meet people and change their lives - it's what he's really, really good at.

As a pastor, it's my job to try and introduce people to Jesus while scooping the piles of religious elephant poop out of the way to give them a place to do so. If you have struggled with some of the poo-filled scenarios I listed above - or worse - know that Christians (most all of them) really do have the best intentions at heart. But, as they say, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions."

If you've been burned one too many times by the Church or by religious people, will you take one more chance to believe? Believe that Jesus is all that he says he is and none of what well-intentioned-but-destructive Christians sometimes make him out to be?

Peace to you this day...

Justin

Immersion Staff UPDATE: Quantum Physics.

2008-02-20T07:33:00.000-08:00

This was a post from the Juice Faith Blog that I write with a few other young pastors in town. I wanted to re-post it here to see what you all think of this topic.

Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below. Take a look:

Wow. Talk about a mind-blowing experience.

I spent the last few weeks in class at Bethel Seminary learning about God and the sub-atomic world. Isaac Newton's Principia pretty much set the standard for modern science, but as people like Albert Einstein and Niels Bohr emerged onto the scene things began to change.

Einstein took us deeper into the realm of the atomic and sub-atomic levels. Simply put, Einstein (and many others) gave us eyes to see what goes on at the most minute level of existence.

The study of this is called quantum physics.

Quantum physics tells us that there are smaller pieces of existence than previously thought. Seems as though the protons, neutrons, and electrons that you and I learned about in science class are made up of even smaller parts called quarks. Quarks, by and large, are a mystery to scientists. They behave erratically and seem to change their make-up depending on whether they are being observed or not.

Did you catch that?

They change their "shape" depending on whether or not they are being watched. In some weird, mysterious way, the sub-atomic world has a sort of "self-awareness". That's some really freaky stuff.

What does this all have to do with faith? Read the words of physicist Stephen Hawking, "the odds against a universe like ours emerging out of something like the Big Bang are enormous. I think there are clearly religious implications."

As we delve further and further into the strands and fibers of the make-up of our universe, we become more and more vexed as to just how all this stuff works. The deeper we dive, the more questions we have. The deeper we dive, the more we see that things, in fact, are not an accident. The universe is calibrated with such intricacy, that to change the gravitational pull of the earth even one thousand million millionth would either send us hurling through space or smash us right into the sun. Fascinating.
I'll sum up this post with the words of Ian Barbour, "this fine tuning [of the universe] could be taken as an argument for the existence of a designer, perhaps a God with an interest in conscious life."

Peace to you on this Monday morning...

Justin

Immersion Staff UPDATE: Blogging Bethel (v.3)

2008-02-09T16:54:00.000-08:00

Okay, so the picture you're looking at is of an unhappy me with a band playing in the background, over my left shoulder. There's three dudes here and they're all wearing trendy hats and shoes and playing their guitars very loudly. Right in front of me.

I am in a coffee shop. When I am in a coffee shop, it's usually to plug my earphones in, sip an Americano, and crank out some work. When I'm in a coffee shop, I usually like to be left alone. Not to be entertained.

This band is trying to entertain me. That is why I am unhappy.

I'm all for artistic creativity - really, I am. But please, trendy-hat friends, can't you just be creative somewhere else?! Not here. Anywhere else but here.

Oh well. Guess it's back to turning up "Band of Horses" even louder and making it obvious that I'm not listening to them. I'd be nicer in different circumstances, but a brotha's got a lot of reading to do.

Peace to you....

Immersion Staff UPDATE: Blogging Bethel (v.2)

2008-02-08T06:36:00.000-08:00

This week has been a lot of fun - to quote a bearded friend of mine, "it has been intellectually satisfying." I've been learning about quantum physics, the chaos theory, entanglement theory, teleportation and its role in the Bible (!!!).

God is opening my mind to the immense creative potential that indwells all of us and how the reality of the universe is so amazingly complex and literally wonderful. The universe is alive and is held together in the person of Jesus - that is why it is alive. The scientific community is even beginning to grasp this on a micro-molecular level. Simply fascinating. We'll probably do a series on science or something like that... Way cool.

Here's some more pics:

Morning stop.

Walk to class.

Sledding down a hill.

After I took this picture, this girl hit her face on a tree. She's okay, but has an egg-sized knot on her temple. We stopped sledding after that.

The happy seminarian.

Immersion Staff UPDATE: Blogging Bethel (v.1)

2008-02-05T20:00:00.000-08:00

For those of you who don't know, I (Justin) am finishing up my last few years here at Bethel Seminary in St. Paul, MN. So when I'm not hanging out at Immersion, preparing a sermon, attending meetings, or goofing off, I'm usually doing some form of school work in order to get my Masters of Divinity.

I'll be up here for the next two weeks. In the meantime, here are a few pics from my life at Bethel:

My friend, Michael. We call him "the Pope".

My bed. That window was open all night. Those Pepsis are frozen through.

My desk. Where I don't study.

My roommate and our closets.

And finally, not hard at work.

2007-12-19T11:16:00.000-08:00

So, I was Christmas shopping last Saturday, which is something I must admit I had really tried to avoid. Being at the mall on a Saturday in December, that is. And the following explains why: I had survived the traffic and made it into the Kohl's parking lot, but an empty space was nowhere to be found. Eventually, I found a car with it's engine running and it's owner brushing the snow off in preparation for departure. I waited for what seemed like an eternity as I watched this woman brush every single snowflake from her vehicle. The impatience in me was quickly changing to actual anger. "How dare she take her time? Can't she see that this place is a zoo? Why doesn't she just want to get out of here ASAP?" I'm confessing to you my thoughts a.k.a road/parking lot rage toward a complete stranger. I am not proud of it. This is not the way I want to think or act during Advent, or any time of the year really. And maybe it's not that big of a deal, a little impatience doesn't necessarily hurt anyone. But what does it say about the state of my heart? About my self-centered perspective on the world? After spending some time asking these questions (believe me, I had time to think!), I chalked it up as a good learning experience and some Holy Spirit conviction. I don't really need more presents this Christmas. But I do need more of His presence. I need more of his transformation in my life. I'm a work in progress. I want to continue to ponder this as well as the truth that God is so very very patient with me.

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 12.10.07

2007-12-10T08:01:00.000-08:00

Greetings to you all this Monday morning... Hope all is well with you!

We've been mulling over this notion of a "Miracle Night" here at Immersion. Wild, I know.

I've been thinking about how the real spiritual gifts of God have been turned into this concept that is so completely bizarre to our modern sensibilities. The notion of God breaking in to our here-and-now, natural world has been turned into something that's only for televangelists and, let's just say it, "weird-o" Christians who handle snakes and drink poison.

I think God wants to change that. I think God wants to use Immersion to change that. Can you imagine Immersion being a place where you can be chatting with a friend over a good cup of coffee one minute and then watching a person rise from the dead the next? Not only that, but the fact that the person rose from the dead is almost an expected reality rather than remain an object of lore.

Let's be honest, most people do not need to hear another sermon. I've said that to some of our leaders here at Immersion, but it's true. I take what I do very seriously - it's a huge responsibility to preach and teach the word of God. But young adults don't want to hear more dead words falling from the mouth of a dead pastor. We, as Christians, are meant to live in power and might. It's supposed to be the norm, not the exception.

So, be ready for some new things I think God wants to try. As staff, we will navigate those avenues faithfully and to the best of our abilities. The rest is up to the Spirit. Are you ready to come along? Will you come expecting miracles? Will you come expecting the unexpected? Will you leave the stoic, dusty pews of religion and enter into the lush and vibrant Promised Land that God has for the people who love and cherish him?

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 12.03.07

2007-12-03T09:13:00.000-08:00

Did you happen to read this? I'm pretty proud of our little city. Granted, most media outlets are forced to be here for the caucuses, but nevertheless, our city is "movin' on up" in the world. Check it out and let us know your thoughts.

What's your favorite place to hang out in DSM? To eat? To catch a cup of coffee? What do you do with your time when you're not here on Thursday nights?

Immersion Staff UPDATE: 11.27.07

2007-11-26T10:15:00.001-08:00

It's been awhile. I know. Moving on...

Do you see this?
This is a proposed "communication life expectancy" graph put out in a projections study. You may or may not be familiar with some of the communication mediums listed, but I want to draw your attention to "Blogs" and "F2F" a.k.a. "face to face". In case you're "graphically challenged," the study is showing that blogs will have a greater audience and lifespan expectancy than face-to-face interaction.

This is both alarming and indicative of where our culture is (allegedly) heading: more technology. This graph shows that people would rather read about other people's lives, news, current events, etc., over a computer screen than sitting in front of them having a discussion. Does this surprise you? Scare you? Encourage you?

What implications does this have for the Church? For Immersion? Better yet, take a look at the following video and ask the same questions... What do you think Immersion, what's the best way to integrate (or disintegrate) from our culture? How do we respond to these new forms of technological communication? (Marshall McLuhan would be proud...)

Staff UPDATE from Justin: 10.15.07

2007-10-15T06:50:00.000-07:00

Man, updating this thing is really hard sometimes. Any of you other people with blogs know what I'm talking about? Honestly...

Well what to tell you all about the inner-workings of Immersion? Didn't Sarah do a great job last week? I told her afterwards that I wanted to run home and immediately get into the Secret Place with the LORD, do some fasting and praying and getting in the Word. Awesome job, we're so blessed to have her on board here at Immersion.

Speaking of fasting, Sarah mentioned that she hated doing it and also mentioned I did as well. Misery loves company, and it's true - I absolutely hate fasting... physically, anyway. There's nothing worse than an empty stomach, except maybe belching with an empty stomach - and belching with an empty stomach that only has a multivitamin in it... Gross. I remember once when I was in high school and we were doing two-a-days for football. I took a Centrum before the AM practice and didn't have time to grab breakfast. I get to practice and start to sweat my brains out, thirstier than all get out. Then I belched. First of all, I was dangerously thirsty. Secondly, the aftertaste of a vitamin and bile-laced belch was almost enough to make me throw up on the spot. Thankfully I didn't and saved myself further embarrassment than that which was already due to me for trying to play football.

At any rate, we're excited for the final week of Immersion's mission statement. Make sure you check it out in person or on the web, beimmersed.com. We'll be talking about how to speak and live and act out the Message of Christ in a culturally relevant way.

Peace to you on this day...

Justin

Staff UPDATE from Justin: 8.29.07

2007-08-29T14:07:00.000-07:00

This week. This week. Man, this week. This week is going to be a great one. I'm excited to be preaching on "The Foreigner"... the culmination of the series we've been in for the past three weeks. You don't want to miss it. We went and met a charming young man, Abdo, yesterday at LSI's Refugee Cooperative Services. You'll get to meet him tomorrow night - can't wait...

I've been wondering what Immersion needs to hear about... Do you have any ideas? I want to be the type of ministry that is not afraid to speak to the things that the 20s and 30s of DSM are encountering... What do you think? Any ideas? Post them in the comments below.

We're getting new leaders popping up all over the place! Welcome to Phillip Kreis and Kari Swenson, the new Men's and Women's Community Coordinators of Immersion. They're going to be around as contacts for all of you Immersionites who want to get connected in significant ways. Also, welcome to Dawn Elliott, as she just came on board as the Immersion Operations Director! Basically, anything that happens on a regular week-to-week basis, Dawn will be making sure those leaders in charge of those areas are feeling supported and cared for, and also to make sure those things get done! She's a great addition to the team and will serve Immersion and Immersionites well...

join us on Facebook! We have a group of about 90 people on Facebook! I know there's been a few people who haven't been able to join (my wife included!), so we're still trying to figure that out. But just run a search for "Immersion" and you'll find us... The familiar black and blue....

The Blitz starts in a few weeks. If you're wanting to get connected at Immersion, this is the place to go... Connections galore... Like Tinkertoys. Look for info at the Info Table and during the announcements...

Alright crew, wrapping it up in the office - hope to see you all tomorrow night. Peace to you...

Justin

Invisible Children: UPDATE

2007-08-24T09:47:00.000-07:00

Alright - so many of you have been contacting us on how you can get involved with "Invisible Children" - especially after the movie we watched last night. I would encourage you to go here:

Invisible Children FAQ's

Keep the faith, church! Remember - you are the church, not a building or a set of ideals or a political belief system. The Church will change the world, nothing else.

Staff UPDATE from Justin: 8.21.07

2007-08-21T06:43:00.000-07:00

I had a thought today, can you believe that we're coming down to the last few months of 2007? Wow, time goes fast.

Well, it's that time at Immersion - the college kids are heading back to school. This is always a bittersweet time for Immersion: the college students who call Des Moines "home" are going back to their "school home," while the students who call someplace else "home" are heading back to their "school home" of Des Moines. The flux is always interesting to watch - new faces coming, old faces going...

We're in the middle of a series right now entitled "The Widow, The Orphan, The Foreigner." It's been a challenging series to plan and prepare for. God, it seems, takes this stuff pretty seriously - taking care of the underprivileged and forgotten of society. It seems that he wants us to take this stuff pretty seriously as well. It's been a challenge to see the areas where I fall dreadfully short in not only "talking the talk" but "walking the walk." Gracefully, slowly, redemptfluly; I'm getting there.

Sorry for such a long lapse in these postings. We've been working like mad around here to try and get our leadership structure in place and running. Exodus 18 - the dialog between Jethro and Moses absolutely blows my mind - and it's what we're basing leadership on here at Immersion!

I think you'll really be pleased at what we have ready for you all tomorrow night. We'll be watching an abridged version of "Invisible Children" with a little bit of teaching as well. It's a powerful film made by a bunch of goofballs - the reality of the film will stare you in the face afterwards, though. Be prepared.

That's it, gang. On a sidenote, my whole day has been made as I've introduced the word "crunk" to the office ladies up front. Pure hilarity. Anyways - see you tomorrow night.

Justin

"Family"

2007-05-31T19:35:00.000-07:00

I had the most beautiful picture of family this week.

My dad had open-heart surgery on Tuesday. But, after a successful surgery, Dad began having complications. His blood pressure and blood oxygen levels were dropping. The nurse called his surgeon and was told to prep Dad for surgery again.

We didn't totally know what was going on, just that it wasn't good. And so we began to make calls. Immediately, people started praying. And before we knew it, people started showing up.

At one point during Dad's second surgery, more than 35 people filled the waiting room. We cried and prayed and laughed to lessen the tension. And then we celebrated the good news from the surgeon and threatened to give him a "group hug."

What struck me throughout the whole process was how beautiful the Body of Christ can be. Sure, we have our bumps and bruises, but for the most part, we're beautiful. We support each other. We love each other. We show up when asked.....and when we're needed, even if not asked.

It makes Paul's admonition in 2 Cor. 1:4 come to life. We comfort those in trouble by the comfort we've received ourselves.

I was comforted by so many on Tuesday. I was loved by family - by birth and by faith. And it made me smile.

Immersion DEVOTION: 05.30.07

2007-05-30T09:43:00.000-07:00

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “Way beyond religion…” Jason Upton, singer/songwriter.

I think we’re coming to a place in human history where, “that’s the way we’ve always done it” isn’t going to quite cut it any longer.

If you pay attention to the statistics, people (specifically young adults) aren’t coming to church anymore. They cite boredom and irrelevancy to their everyday lives as reasons for not coming. “The way we’ve always done it” is not working any longer, and I could not be more pleased. You see, we are in a time when God is doing something fresh and new – something that looks very different from “the way things have always been done.” God will no longer allow political or denominational lines to form a box around his beauty and majesty. Those lines, that box – the “box” of religion – is beginning to be dismantled by the gracious hand of God.

What are we, as Immersion, going to do with that? God is such that he does not reside only in a temple “built by human hands.” What are we going to do with this knowledge? How are we going to respond to a God who “desires mercy, not sacrifice?” Meaning – God desires a “repentant and contrite heart” over you coming to church on Thursdays or Sundays. What are we going to do when the walls of religion come tumbling down in the church of America? Will we be ready…?

Prayer for the week: Father of Lights, the Fragrant One, break us out of the boxes that we spend so much of our time in. The boxes of religion, of “the way things have always been done,” these boxes of fear and apathy, of doing things by rote and uncreatively. You are the one who is constant but always changing. Teach us to be constant in our devotion and love to you but open to change everywhere else. In Yeshua’s Name, Amen.

The tank is not included...

2007-05-16T17:24:00.000-07:00

So my charcoal grill finally bit the dust after 5 years of faithful service... I am a diehard charcoal guy but my wife convinced me to get into the now and go acquire a gas grill. We were having a HUGE Mother's day gathering and the grillmaster needed an appropriate weapon at his disposal. And so the quest began...

I started with the Sunday ads in an attempt to find the cheapest/best option out there. I poured over every major retailer and found the one I wanted... I ventured out at 10:00am only to experience my first roadblock- the store did not open until 11:00am. So after twiddling my thumbs and getting a cup of coffee, young Noah Brandt and I finally stood before the future Brandt family grilling machine. The price was right and we called over the friendly neighborhood grill expert to complete the sale. This grill also came with the most beautiful words my eyes had ever seen while grill shopping, "free assembly included!" However, my next roadblock came with my next obvious question... "so where is the tank?" After tacking an additional $50 onto the sticker price, the entire package, tank and all made it safely home to my deck... Ah the fine print we so often miss...

Do you ever wonder what life would be like if we had the whole picture going into things? Have you ever thought about how much simpler it would be in our feeble attempt to understand God if we knew everything about Him? Adam and Eve tried that approach... Moses asked to see God's face only to catch a glimpse of his backside which was so intense, Moses glowed all the way down the mountain... Job found out the hard way that God is and he wasn't... and on and on in scripture. The bigness of God, even the mystery of God is what drew His people to Him and can draw us yet today! You can read the same passage of scripture many times and have God speak to you in many different ways! It is impossible to know God fully this side of heaven. And yet we are fully known by Him! I find peace in that... but I am a simple guy that doesn't always concern himself with the fine print...

InHim,

Mark

737(Reprise)

2007-05-15T07:44:00.000-07:00

Quiet(Night)Music

2007-05-11T12:35:00.000-07:00

Some of you have been asking about the music we were playing last night during the service. For your listening pleasure, here is a sampling of the songs that were played, available for purchase through iTunes. Enjoy...